It was thirty years ago now. A friend and I enrolled in a private university and went to Tokyo. To put it more appropriately, we took a bus to Tokyo because we were going there. Like all candidates in the world, I was looking out the window with a bit of anxiety and uncertainty. In order to stabilize my mood, I talked and chatted. However, the situation was completely different when a high school girl came up from Tokyo and sat in the seat next to us. It was a beautiful girl with the appearance of a sunken fish. My friend and I were more or less confused and our conversation dropped. By the time my friend tried to talk to the girl, the car had already passed Shizuoka.
She had enrolled in a university in Kyoto and was on her way back to Izu Daini. My friend whispered quietly in my ear.
"It's a dancer from Izu!"
I didn't know why they called her a dancer from Izu, but I just nodded my head. The girl also began to talk with us and said that if all three of us passed the exam, we should celebrate together somewhere. This comment disturbed our minds. She got off the bus at Mishima after leaving that sweet smile.
"I'm not going to take the university in Tokyo either, I'll take the one in Kyoto. ......"
My friend muttered, not all in jest.
"I've just been thinking that if I go this year, I'll probably fail, so it would be wiser to study for another year, slowly strengthen my strength, and take the test next year."
I also took out my heart. The decision was made without thinking about it. We spent the money that my parents had given us for Tokyo on a trip to Izu, so we got off the bus in Atami. --What an ungrateful son. Also, it was the first time in my life that I changed my mind in the middle of the trip. We were in a great mood, soaking in the hot springs in Izu and thinking about the pretty girl who lived in Oito. Although she left her address and phone number, we just looked at the piece of paper and didn't do anything. Three days later, it was as if we had just finished an exam and returned home.
Six months later, my friend's father passed away, and because he inherited the family business and continued to run continuously, he put off the idea of entering the university.
As for me, I threw the entrance examination aside and looked for novels to read everywhere. But in their hearts, they failed to forget the shadow of the girl they met on the train. When we get together, we always talk about this topic, did she get into Kyoto University? I miss it, I can't help it. One day, we came up with a guessing game, whoever loses will call her home. When I lost, I dialed the phone, and she came back from Kyoto. She answered the phone and said that she had successfully entered the university and was staying with a relative in Maruta-cho.
"Which one of you two are you?"
She asked. Just to make a joke, I gave my friend's name. After a moment of silence, she whispered.
"If we meet, I will only meet with you alone."
I was silent, holding the phone for a moment without moving. After that, it was time to hang up. Maybe there would have been a better way to do it, but eighteen-year-old me kept that to myself. What to do, I didn't know.
"Hey, what about it, what did it say?"
My friend's eyes glowed, asking over and over. I lied and said she didn't get into college and went out to work, and she said not to call any more and hung up.
"Hey, that's easy to blow off."
He stuck his tongue out and gave a smile.
This thing, in my heart has not been able to eliminate. The first lost love in my life, how can not leave scars in the heart? I can say that my lies are more than enough, only this time even I can not forgive myself. The reason I'm writing this down now is because my love interest - that friend - died in a traffic accident ten years ago.
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