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The light of another day

Just one more day

By Jennifer Louise BarnardPublished 4 months ago 3 min read
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The light came in through the window. Shining bright. A lot brighter than my mood. My mind is alert but my body is slow to respond. Not wanting to wake up, not wanting to start the day, I lie dead still, with my eyes still closed, trying to push the day away. Like a movie, I play the last year of my life through my head.

It started so well. This day last year, the light wasn’t bright enough. My 21st birthday. My life was just getting started. I was up before the sun. Jogging on the beach. Music in my ears. A smile on my face. A big day lay ahead. A big get-together with family and friends. What made the day so exciting was that my best friend from school was back from oversees and he was going to be there.

I had a secret crush on him since I was 14, he was 16. He was my first kiss. I turned sweet 16 and never been kissed and he felt it his duty to change that. We were sitting on the roof outside my bedroom window, looking at the stars. We were talking and laughing and then that thing came out. He grew all serious, kissed me, and then went on looking at the stars and talking as if nothing had changed. For me, my whole world had changed. The stars suddenly shone brighter.

Unfortunately, he was off to university a few weeks later. We kept in touch. Never talked about the kiss. Obviously another guy never stood a chance after that. And he never mentioned a girl, so I remained hopeful. After his 4 years of business school, he went for a year to travel and work in Europe. And on my 21st birthday, I would see him again.

The whole day was filled with people running around and calling. Finally 4 o’clock came and the people started to arrive. A few fires were started for the barbecue. Lots of congratulations went around, but I only waited for one.

And then, he was there. When I saw him, lots of different emotions went through my mind. What if I hoped and longed in vain? Then our eyes met and he smiled his photograph smile, and all other faces and voices vanished. He pulled me into a bear hug and swung me around. I wished that all the other people would go home and impatiently I waited.

Finally everyone had left except him. We started cleaning up and talking about all his adventures and my dancing. We ended the night with hot chocolate and sitting on the roof again. It was there that he told me how he felt. How that kiss stayed with him every day and how he missed me. I was dancing in the stars.

From then on we were basically inseparable. The night we got engaged was just as magical.

And then everything changed, again. We had just visited some friends. We were driving home, and a drunk driver came from the front. We got hit on his side. He died holding my hand, looking me in the eyes and smiling: I love you. I was in and out of it for a couple of weeks. And now, a month later, my fairy tale is over and every day is gloom.

Will the light ever shine in my heart again?

I take a deep breath as I will the tears away. And then with one foot after the other, I climb out of bed.

Short Story
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