The Inner Silence:

I used to hear them talking about me. I guess you could say they were spirits, or angels, or something. As I got older I ignored the voices. They went away eventually as I sat in my small room reading my science fiction books and fantasy books. I couldn’t get enough of those books until something strange happened--I got a hold of a book on spirituality and shamanism. I was very young.

I didn’t know the difference between science and shamanism. To me they seemed like the same thing. The shaman would do the work, look, observe, apply certain rituals and techniques learned throughout the ages by people who experimented and categorized what worked, just as the scientist would. At the age of 7 I didn’t know the difference, and I still don’t think there is one.

My interest in science and spirituality grew. More and more information on both these subjects were becoming available at the touch of a button. The old dusty books I had to find in the stacks in the nearby library were available on the internet. I was in heaven until I discovered that some of the things on the internet were quite wacky, even if interesting. I still continued to study both.

Around the age of 17 or 18, when I entered college, I discovered a form of fundamentalism that made my desire to learn more in both areas much more of a challenge. The scientists refused to admit that anything existed that human beings couldn’t observe and measure.

Their ideas were based on an old, leaky foundation that started all the way back in the 1800s. Many of those assumptions had been proven inadequate, if not totally incorrect through their own methods, but they ignored those findings. They would cling to those old beliefs like a religious fanatic clinging to misinterpreted bible verses.

The spiritual group was being taken over by fundamentalists. The people seeking Spirit, whatever they called it, but who had been hurt by their various faiths or religions had packed themselves into this new genre. They were good at quoting the teachings of those who they considered great teachers, but not living them, or really experiencing them.

Their voices were growing stronger each year. This left me in a quandary--Science vs. Spirituality. Which would I hook my wagon to? None. I had to really find the truth and I couldn’t find it where I was so I had to do it. I had to leave home and go on my own journey. That meant doing a walkabout, or driveabout in modern society.

A walkabout was supposed to be a somewhat spiritual ritual performed by some of the indigenous people of Australia. A person would leave their home and walk all over the known world at the time exploring things and learning new things through their interactions with people as well as the natural environment.

They would not only gather knowledge from conversations, but their spiritual knowledge would increase as they carried out their own spiritual practices and spent time alone, solitary. So I decided to go on walkabout.

All of my work went into studying courses and getting into a job position that would allow for it. Finding a place where I had seasonal work was hard, but I accomplished it. Looking back I realize that I had given up a lot to be able to move around the country...no wife, no children, no home...just a beat up van, a membership at LA Fitness where I could shower, a PO Box, and a fake address where I could do my banking. That’s all I had. But I think it was worth it because I found what I was looking for. It happened one night in Colorado Springs.

I had my van parked at a campsite. I was there for about three days. I had found a spot as far as I could from everyone else, but as usual, everyone seemed to have the same idea. I found myself surrounded by people playing radios, talking, laughing and drinking. This was not new. I had gotten used to it and was happy that I had a van instead of a tent. At least I could dull the loudness, but...I loved sitting outside in front of the fire. I had a great fire blazing. The sun was just setting. For some reason it was quiet that night. I sat there and took a deep breath when a homeless person approached me.

He was about five foot seven, average height. He looked to be in his mid fifties. Something about his eyes were strange. He seemed joyful almost. There was a spark of youth in his eyes that I had lost somewhere along the way. My arguing and debating with the fundamentalists had sapped my strength. As he approached I wondered what the heck he was doing all the way out there in the woods. He stopped at the edge of the camp and waved. I gave him a nod.

“Beautiful night,” he said.

“Yes. It is? How are you tonight?”

“Well. Very well. I’m camping about 4 campsites away. I just decided to take a walk and I noticed that this is the only other campsite I’ve seen that is usually quiet.” He laughed to himself. I smiled.

“That’s true. You want to come over and sit a while?”

“Sure.” As he approached I opened the extra folding chair and he took a seat.

“So. Where are you from?” I asked.

“I move around a lot. I’m on something they used to call…”

“A walkabout?” I said. He nodded.

“That’s crazy.” I responded.

“Well not crazy, just strange.”

“No. I mean, that’s crazy because I’m on one too.”

“Oh. That’s a great coincidence. Maybe our paths are supposed to cross. Where’d you start off from.”

“Chicago. And you.”

“I’m not from here. I’m on a walkabout from...” He was hesitant. He folded his arms across his chest. “Well, I guess since you are on walkabout and looking for something new I can tell you. I’m from the nether region. Have you heard of the Hollow Earth theory?”

“Yes.”

“Well it’s more like...say you have a piece of clay or something that you heat. It solidifies and has little bubbles in it like a honeycomb or something. That’s how our world is, and there are actually people who live in those underground caverns. Whole civilizations. I’m from one of them. I’m an Inner Earth being.”

“Oh yeah. I really believe that.”

He grinned. “I’m serious. Is it so hard to believe?”

“Yes.” I said. “Yes and no,” I corrected. “There may be beings like that, but the likelihood of me meeting them is astronomical, from what I’ve read about them. According to those who believe in them they don’t deal with us.” He laughed.

"Do you really think a civilization would live underground and not keep an eye on the large civilization living above them who are wreaking havoc when it comes to pollution, the weather, wars, and violence? Do you really think that?”

“Well if they didn’t exist I wouldn’t have to worry about it, and if they do and don’t do anything about it, what concern are they?”

“You seek knowledge don’t you? You have the desire to know. Think of what you could learn from a civilization that is millions of years old. Aren’t you even curious?”

“I’m very curious, except...”

“You think I’m some kind of crazy, homeless man. Have you looked in the mirror lately? You look kind of homeless, with a van. Did you notice that?”

“No. Because I know me and I know I’m not homeless with a van.” I laughed a little. “Yeah. I guess you’re right. I may look a little scruffy and bummy, but to hear someone say they are an Inner Earth being is a little shocking and questionable. You have to understand that?”

“Sure. That’s why I have proof.”

“Don’t tell me. You are going to pull your finger off for me.” He laughed. He suddenly became serious.

“We’re going to adopt you as an adept, if you would like.”

I arched my brows. “I guess that means...what?”

“Say yes--a world of adventure. Say no, you go on your way and soon the old homeless guy you met at a campground in Colorado Springs becomes just a story to tell your friends and something...a missed opportunity, that you wonder about all of your life.” I sat there thinking as he waited patiently.

“Ok. I’ll bite.”

“You don’t have to go that far.”

“No, it means, I take the bait. I ‘ll say yes. What will happen now?”

“Someone will come see you tonight. First in your dream and then tomorrow morning we’ll meet you.” He grinned. “Is that alright?” He arched his brows. I wondered if I were making a deal with the devil. He smiled pleasantly.

“Sure. Send somebody to visit me in my dreams.”

“All right.” He stood and brushed himself off. “Tonight.” He extended his hand. “I will be seeing you tomorrow, or someone will.” I stood and gave him a nod as we shook hands. He turned and left the site. I sat back in my camping chair and fed the fire a little more. He was a strange guy. I hadn’t even remembered to ask his name. He looked homeless, yet again, so did I. I laughed to myself. Maybe I was homeless.

***

I woke up in sheer terror. What had that old man planted in my head? I had a dream where four people were arguing with the old man for inviting me somewhere when he had no right. Another one just sat there listening as they argued back and forth with the guy. In the dream I realized I had never even given him my name. The fact that he didn’t even know my name really upset the people around him. They were going at it hard until the fifth person, a tall woman with long dark hair stood up and began to walk out.

The short black man threw up both his hands, “What Sheila! You’re just leaving? This doesn’t interest you?” She glanced back over her shoulder with a total look of boredom on her face. “I think you should have a seat.” She returned reluctantly as the others glared at her. She shrugged and grinned.

“Oops. I’m sorry. I thought we were done.” She took her seat again. “Just tell the guy not to come if you don’t want him to and he’ll just think it was a dream.”

“He’s probably listening right now,” the man said.

“That won’t change anything.” Another woman with somewhat Asian features looked at her and shook her head.

“We can’t do that Sheila.” She looked at the old man. “We gave our word, now we have to go through with it.”

“I agree, Anja,” the short black man said.

“I just knew you would, Solomon,” Sheila commented. They all looked at her angrily.

“Now we need a mentor,” Solomon said. “I think Sheila would be a good mentor.” Everyone began to agree except for the old man.

“Put it this way, Bob,” said Mark, a dark haired man with chiseled features, who had been quiet compared to the others. “Either she mentors or no one. Beggars can not be choosers.” Everyone began to agree.

“She can’t mentor that man, she’s crazy! She hates the surface people and you know the affect she has on everyone." Bob said. He looked at her laughed even as he was speaking. The mood lifted as everyone began to smile except for Sheila.

“Congratulations, Sheila,” Solomon said. “Have fun. Maybe it's time you learned to work with people. You're in line to govern. This will be a good chance to prove yourself. Do you agree, or should I be having this talk with your Father?" She frowned and nodded, but She didn’t seem to like that at all.

I woke up right then. For some reason I was filled with both awe and terror. It was about 4AM and very quiet, except for a few strong gusts of wind every so often. I got out of the van and went to the bathroom. When I came back a strange woman was sitting in my folding chair in front of the van. It was dark. She scared the heck out of me at first.

“Who? What are you doing out here, Miss?” I shined the light on her. She lifted her hand to shield her eyes.

“Will you put that down! You know who I am.” She looked like the woman in the dream. She was tall for a woman, very tall. Strange looking eyes too. I wondered if this was some type of joke, but how could it be? She stood up. Please remove your light from my eyes! Came through more strongly, but her mouth wasn’t moving. I lowered it so it wasn’t shining in her face. “Thank you.” She lowered her hand, sat back down, and patted the seat beside her.

“Now that you have had your little wee wee, take a seat and let me look at you to see what I have to work with.”

“Who are you?” I asked. “I mean who are you really?”

“Is that a spiritual type thing or something? Do you mean who I am on a larger scale, or what?”

I took a seat facing her. I wasn’t going to turn my back on that babe. “Who are you?” I repeated.

“What difference would it make to know what my name is or where I’m from if you haven’t been there? My name is Sheila. I am the daughter of the First Regent of South Western Region. Does that help? You knew I’d come visit this morning.”

“It’s around 4 O'clock.”

“We call that morning where I come from.”

“You shouldn’t be out here all alone. It’s dangerous! You’re a woman. You crazy thing! You’re big, but it’s still dangerous.” She started smiling.

“I have a gun with me and I’m quick to shoot,” she said. I stiffened up a little and she laughed. “Just joking. You surface people are all so scared and violent. You do too much harm to each other and every other creature. You’ll learn about living in peace and harmony when you come to my home."

I’m your mentor. Some of our interactions will be face to face, some mind to mind. As you may notice, I’m talking to you in your mind right now as you blather and talk out loud so everybody and everything can hear you, and sometimes I'm speaking out loud! You’ll learn to do that too so you don't look crazy when you use telepathy.”

“I don’t think I want to go with you. I thought that old man was just crazy.”

“Well he wasn’t and you are under my tutelage if you want to be or not. You made a bargain and you are going to stay true to it.”

“Or what?” I asked. I crossed my arms.

“There is no ‘or what.’ You will be true to it. You don’t have a choice. We can either do it the hard way, or the humane way. Which is your preference?” I couldn’t believe this. “Don’t go silent on me now. You’re supposed to be on some spiritual journey. Well welcome to the real world. You don’t have a choice. What’s your decision?” She said, caustically.

“I don’t like being threatened.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” She stood. “I will see you tomorrow. You will drive your van to a designated safe space and we will proceed into the caverns. You’ll spend some time with me and then come back to your world the better for it. That’s the way I see your future. I can also see an alternative one. You're out here camping. You have an accident on the road and go into a coma and we do our lesson all inside your head. Which do you like best?”

“I’m talking to you in your head. How hard do you think it is for me...for us, to arrange for something like an accident, or a coma?”

“OK. I’ll go with you if all of this is true.”

“I thought you might.”

“How could I not?”

“You shouldn’t have said yes if you didn’t want to.”

“You are a bit too intense. Can I have another mentor?”

“You are too. I’ll see you tomorrow!” She turned and tromped off into the dark at a quick pace.

“Do you need a flashlight?” I asked as an afterthought.

“Fuck off,” came back.

What a bitch!

End Part 1

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