The Halloween Leprechaun

I remember the day I met Charles, he was short and fat and dressed all in orange and black. He was a leprechaun, believe it or not. He only came out on Halloween. In Enon Ohio is where this li"le guy resides. I invited him in, for a candy apple; he looked so kind. He had a twinkle in his eye and shiny buckles, gold I think, on his shoes. ‘’I just made some fresh candy apples,’’ I said, ‘’would you like to give one a try?’’‘’I’d be delighted,’’ the li"le guy gave a quick nod.‘’Come on in,’’ I said.The leprechaun followed me into the kitchen and then he did something, no one could believe. He ate the whole thing, stem in all. In one monstrous bite. ‘’Wow,’’ I exclaimed. ‘’I never saw that before!’’‘’I bet you haven’t,’’ the cri"er replied. ‘’I’m a leprechaun and you’re merely a human.’’The creature proceeded to fart and I used the inside of my t shirt as a mask. I raced to the window, with my eyes burning and opened every window in the house. ‘’It smells like cheese, pastrami and red wine.’’‘’I only drink whiskey, my boy and I only eat spoiled meat.’’My stomach churned. ‘’I hate to be rude,’’ I lied. ‘’But I think maybe you ought to leave.’’The leprechaun looked at me and shook his head. ‘’I think you’re wrong there, my boy,’’ the leprechaun retorted. I like your house, I think I’ll live here forever.’’‘’We’ll see about that,’’ I replied.