I stand so still, and it makes the movement of the elevator that much more jarring as it begins rising again. If I move, I wonder if the world will stop, but when I try nothing happens.
I run fingertips over the glowing buttons and the numbers rise as my hand moves lower. The first floor and the one marked ‘lobby’ have gone out, and I run careful fingers over the number two, still glowing with yellowy light. I wonder what I will find when the elevator opens, but I don't have any idea what to expect. I close my eyes as the ding of the opening door sounds from a speaker that I can't see.
For long moments, I don't move, eyes squeezed shut.
When the spinner of fate draws me out, it is as if I am being pulled to her by a string.
The second floor is dark and musty as an antique shop. Along the walls yarn sits in hanging baskets. Some are wrapped in tight balls, others lay loose, strings clinging from one basket to another.
The pull of Clotho is entrancing, I walk through crowded hallways and shelves; I don't know what i am looking for, but I think I will know it when I see it. And I do.
The light is warm and sunny and I think for a second that the gloom and dust were an illusion. I can't quite see her face, it is as if she is everyone doing everything at once. When I think I find someone familiar, I can't recognize them fast enough.
Fate looks me in the eyes and there are so many things that could have been. I wonder why she chooses the ones she does.
Clotho doesn’t take her eyes off me as I move closer, she knows i'm here and I don't understand why she ignores me.
Spinning the cloth of fate, she is both beautiful and terrifying. I think that if I were to touch the glittering threads, it would drive me mad.
When Clotho speaks, I can't hear her exactly, but I feel how her words are supposed to sound.
‘You cannot find your way?’ She says, but I don't respond, ashamed.
‘I will not show you the right path.’
For a long moment, I am quiet. ‘Is there a right path?’
She laughs. ‘That is the wrong question.’
So I ask her what the right question is.
But Clotho laughs at me again.
‘That is not for me to tell.’
My fists tighten in frustration. ‘How else will I find the answer?’
She smiles and her eyes are serene, calm as an early morning sunrise.
‘Try looking for it.’ She says, and vanishes in front of me.
‘Where do I look?’ I say to the empty air. ‘How will I know when I find it?’
In a flash of a moment, she is behind me, and my gasp is audible when she pushes me hard. ‘You'll know.’ She says, and I brace myself for the crash only to find that I am back in the elevator. The the second floor light has gone dark.