The Dive Instructor 2

This is really out of my expectations.

I had 2 dives last Sunday, while the instructor had 3 dives in total. When we were ascending and made the safe stop, I found his right hand shaking obviously. I know he usually gets cold since he likes to say "cold". I guess he's tired because of diving thrice in 6 hours. I felt particularly distressed. So I put my left hand onto it, while we had the other hand holding together due to my limited diving experience. Then we stay there for 3 mins, holding each others's hands, tightly.

I've already tried to avoid having too much affection for him, unfortunately, I failed again. We were separated at the beginning of my second dive, and I even found the tricky way to control my perfect boyancy by adjusting my BC. Then he reached out to me with his right hand again, and I held it as usual. Later on, when he was looking around for another 2 dive buddies, I saw the eyes of another girl, who seemed to be observing us, holding each other's hands like that in front of them. I was a little embarrassed, but didn't care much. On the contrary, I enjoyed the way he held me, I even got closer to him, and I could feel his arm. It's like walking with a lover under the sea. I never had this kind of experience before, especially publicly.

Before I left at the end of the day, he asked me when I was planning to go back. I said next Sunday. He asked me to text him. I did it. Because he never remembers me, I asked him if he knew who I am. By chance, he thought I was asking where I was, he invited me for a drink. Then, a further invitation to his house.

The next day, he asked what I was doing at noon. Then we started to chat. Because I do like him, I checked his status and saw a sorrowful paragraph. I've tried my best not to ask him initially, but since we're chatting, I asked what that means. He wanted me to change is sad emotions. Then we made an appointment to meet later after work.

I used to call him upon his request, though we said nothing special. After more chat, he wants to call me again, and I agreed. Then that was something I've been shocked. He said he likes me! He said I'm very special to him. When he was holding my hand, when he was together with me, he was so happy and could feel his heartbeat. What was even more shocking is that he said so firmly to me that "You like me!", thrice as I remember. I was like being pushed to a corner, with everything revealed. I tried to understand if it's because I sometimes chat with him in the diving center initially, because I saw he was sitting there alone without joining our dive buddies chat. I wanted to make him happy and involved. Or if it's because I covered his hand while he was shaking. I do like him, but I didn't plan to show him. I was extremely surprised that he reads my mind. Then he kept saying that he needs me, he wants to be together with me for a good moment.

Then I'm sure, when he kept on saying that he's alone, he has nobody, he can do anything he wants. He may want to say those above. Although I am eager to have something with him, I don't want to in real. I'm too conflicted because I do have my boyfriend.

Since then, I've been drawn into his messages. I listened over and over again, which made me have to delete all the chats to stop myself. I fell in love with him again! I stared at the message and saw his on and off. All night long. I can't fall asleep but to think over his expressions again and again. I want to chat with him, but I'm afraid that could influence his dives the next day...

I'm so happy that he likes me, and he feels I like him too. I really like the way he says "You like me". Getting addicted.