The Book-Keeper

There exists, deep in the secrecy of library shelves, an Organisation.

The Librarians, Book-keepers, Readers And wRiters, Insistent Advocacy by Numbers (LIBRARIAN) organisation, to be exact. Those fortunate enough to be unfamiliar with the organisation - which was to say, most of the people inhabiting a random bar in a small town - were understandably puzzled by the instinctive cowering of everyone who was familiar with them, when the door opened and a woman dressed in black entered.

Sure, everyone got twitchy at the thought of their parent or significant other finding them in a bar when they swore over the phone that they were just working late. Even when that was the case, though, the one lady couldn’t be wife or mother to all of the quietly-whimpering bar patrons.

There was nothing about her that really explained the reaction, either. Quite the opposite, in fact. A woman of ‘undetermined years’, hair that had once been golden but was now edging toward platinum as grey crept in, and built with the kind of soft plumpness that suggested she would whip out a plate of freshly-baked cookies at any moment.

The beatific smile she bestowed on the staring crowd, however, changed as her gaze fell on the ones who recognised her, hinting at the triumph of a pursuit predator who had finally run its prey to ground. The crowd of the blissfully-ignorant began to wonder if the cringing minority might not have a valid reason for their obvious fear. Her posture was relaxed but ready as she scanned the bar. “I’m the Book-keeper, and I’m here for Mr Payne, Jackson.”

A young man in a business suit tried to make a break for the door, but had barely pushed his chair back when the Book-keeper’s hands moved, and Jackson Payne jerked back into his seat. On closer inspection, his sleeves were pinned to the table with what turned out to be old-fashioned filing cards. The Book-keeper tucked the filing box, something that most of the patrons only recognised as a relic of distant childhood memories, back into her coat, and pulled out a small record book. “Now, then. Overdue book fines in fifteen different libraries, all unpaid. Two video rental stores that revoked your membership after an established pattern of unreturned DVDs.”

She closed the book with a very final-sounding snap. “Did you really think that you’d get away with it?”

Jackson tried for a charming smile, and failed miserably as the Book-keeper stalked toward where he was trapped. “Oh, come on! I thought we shared something special?”

A solid punch caught him square in the jaw, stunning him as she pulled the filing cards free, tucking them back into the little brown box in proper alphabetical order. “That was before I found out what you really were, book-thief.”

She hauled him to his feet, glaring around at the rest of the bar’s occupants, the majority of whom were trying to blend into the furniture. A few were actually attempting to hide under the stools or tables, heedless of exactly what had been spilled there in the undetermined past and left to dry stickily. It was still preferable to drawing the Book-keeper’s attention. “Anyone else with overdue accounts, you have three days to clear them. After that, I’ll add you to my list, and you won’t like it if I have to hunt you down.”

There was a ringing silence as the Book-keeper departed with her bounty, before two patrons glanced at each other nervously. “Do you think three days is long enough to skip town?”

The sound of shattering glass was the only warning before a book catalogue flew through a window, scoring a perfect head-shot and knocking the speaker unconscious. His friend checked for a pulse, before draining the rest of his beer in a single gulp. “Maybe, but that will only make it worse when she comes for you.”

He stood up, pulling out his wallet to pay his tab. “See you later in the week, mate. Gotta pay the fees as soon as the library doors open tomorrow.”

There was a scraping of chairs as several others decided to follow his example. The Book-keeper’s appearance might belie her deadly skill, but there was a reason that she was known and feared as LIBRARIAN’s most successful bounty hunter.

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