Salubrious part 33

“I think a monster that sort of comes out of nowhere and doesn’t have like an immediate explanation, it’s, like better than anything else. Like how in the first Jaws you don’t really see the shark at first. That’s really good editing and shit, like your mind conjures up better, scarier pictures than what you can see,” Charlie says as their entrees are brought over.

“Thank you, wait-or,” Allan says as he starts cutting his steak.

The waiter nods. “Anything you all need?”

Charlie shakes his head. “No, no. What about you Allan?”

Allan shakes his head. “Nope-uh.”

“So it was like I was saying like the monster that is kinda like, lost in the fog and we don’t see it, like that’s cool. You know man?” Charlie’s continues.

“Like in The Happening or The Mist?” Allan asks.

“No. I personally felt like The Happening was a satirical film that had shitty acting, for one, and two, a poorly represented sort of horror plot. The Mist was better. But not by a whole lot,” Charlie snorted a bit, “Would you pass me the pepper over there?”

Allan nodded, giving him the pepper.

“I like the Japanese horror sty-le. The Hanging Balloons one. Where the dead coup-able’s head are floating around and kiss in the air,” Allan says, looking at Charlie intensely.

Charlie scoffs. “Yeah that.. that was something else, dude. I didn’t get it. I honestly was so confused the entire time you had me watch it with you, it was really… weird.”

“Yeah, that’s the point,” Allan says seriously.

“Who even thought of weird ass shit like that?” Charlie says as he’s chewing his salad.

“Junji Ito did, Charlie. That’s why he’s a artistic genius and you’re here talking with your mouth full of salad. Salad that I have to make you eat, to keep you alive enough for me to enjoy your nonsense.”

“That’s real funny, Allan, why don’t we talk about how you jump from buildings to, fucking helicopters and shit that gets caught on fire. That’s cute coming from you, dude. Like, just, you actually did an action movie just to get the boss some paper clips,” Charlie teased with a bit of seriousness. “I am sure if it weren’t for perfect timing you would’ve killed yourself.”

“Well luckily for you, my timing is always perfect,” Allan says with a saucy smile.

“Yeah. Yeah. You’re so lucky you’re cute otherwise no one would… dude, I lost my fucking train of thought, how the hell are you doing that?” Charlie laughed, looking at Allan who was balancing a spoon off his nose.

“You’re just jelly you aren’t coordinated like me, Charlie, dear,” Allan teases. Charlie laughs harder.

“You… you’re gonna get us kicked out, man. They don’t play that shit here. It’s a nice fucking rest—haha,” Charlie whispered and the spoon fell on the table.

“You try it.”

Charlie shook his head. “No.”

“Pleeeease-uh?” Allan whines.

“You’ll just make fun of my big nose,” Charlie grumbles.

“I like your big nose.”

Charlie blushes. “Shut up.” Charlie attempts to balance a spoon off his nose, but it falls immediately.

“That was so funny, Charlie. Your nose is catastrophically big. Haha,” Allan says in a deadpan tone.

Charlie slow claps. “You’re getting off on tormenting me, aren’t you? Especially in that hot pink eyeshadow. You look like one of the femme fatales.”

“I can whip you later, big boy,” Allan flirts. Charlie covers his mouth, feeling hot.

“Dude, people will hear this weird gay shit… stop!” Charlie whispers. Allan chuckles not nods.

“So, anyway, I talked to Pim today. He’s dating that girl we all met at the bar,” Allan says, trying to calm his boyfriend down.

“Yeah Pim told me too. I called him before our date,” Charlie says. Allan gives him a hard stare.

“What?”

“Charlie, is that why you were late?”

Charlie frowns, gulps and gives him a forced smile. “I’m, uh, sorry. Yeah.”

“Oh, wow-uh. Now you owe me. Tonight I pick the show we watch before bed,” Allan teases. “I want to watch that new anime out now.”

“You know, silly thing about that, like I was telling Pim that he was like my blood brother. Like in some anime. And he was like, ‘Charlie you don’t watch anime,’ but I totally do. Like I watch shit like that with you all the time.”

“Charlie, Pim’s right. You don’t. It’s only because of me that you watch it now.”

Charlie scoffs, “Seriously? I used to watch Dragon Ball Z. That was my shit. My childhood nostalgia right now in a single show.”

Allan rolls his eyes. “Sure, Charlie. Whatever you say.”

“Dude you think you know me so well but I have tons of cool shit you don’t know yet,” Charlie boasts.

“Like what?” Allan eyes him with an unconvinced look.

“Uh, well, I have abs hidden under my chubby stomach. Like a total six pack, dude. It’s hard as a effing rock.”

Allan spits out his champagne, laughing.

“Dude, it’s not funny. I’m serious,” Charlie blushes, smiling a bit.

“Oh my gosh, Charlie, you kill me.”

“Anyway, you up to do a double date with Pim and his new girlfriend soon? I talked to Pim about it already and he said yes.”

Allan nods. “Okay.” They were quiet for a few moments, finishing up their dinner.

“So, works slowed down a lot,” Charlie murmurs.

Allan frowns. “Yeah. It’s spring now. We almost never get any clients during this time. The whole seasonal depression thing kinda melts away when the snow melts too.”

Charlie perks up. “Oh my God, dude. That’s so right. I never thought of that, but it’s true. Spring makes people smile more. That’s brilliant.”

“I know. That’s why I make rocket boots and file things. I like to be logical and factual.”

Charlie grinned. “That’s why you’re.. why I like you so much, dude. You’re just so smart.”

Allan smiles, “Thank you, Charlie, you’re so sweet. I like when you’re sweet and not grumpy. But I also like your grumpiness. It’s like an old man in your body.”

Charlie winks at him. “Ah, you like when I’m sweet, huh? Well, maybe that is why you’re the only one that gets to see my sweet side so often…”

“Oh, Charlie, something about you tonight makes me want to try that thing you..”

“Did you enjoy your meals?” The waiter asks, moving up to their table to take plates.

The couple nods nervously.

“Yes. It was adequate,” Allan says.

Charlie laughs with a snort, “Everything was so good. Don’t worry, he enjoyed it, that’s just his enthusiastic voice,” Charlie laughs nervously.

Allan gives Charlie a blank stare.

The waiter tries to not look disturbed and smiles, “Um, dessert? Would you.. are you wanting dessert?”

“Sure. Charlie?”

Charlie nods, looking away from the waiter’s eyes.

“Okay. We will share the chocolate torte. I’ll get an espresso. He’ll have a glass of milk,” Allan ordered.

“Milk? I’m not a child,” Charlie says as the waiter nods and leaves.

“It’s for your own health, Charlie. Not because of your immature addd-it-tude.”

Charlie scoffs.

“So, kinda wanted to talk about something. You know how I do those anime conventions and get dressed up?” Allan asks.

“Yeah. What about it?”

Allan sighs. “Last time I got harassed really badly and I wanted to know if you could be my bodyguard and pro-tech-tor. Since you’re my boyfriend.”

Charlie nods vigorously. “What happened? And yes I can definitely come with you. Is that coming up?”

“Next weekend. This guy wouldn’t stop talking to me. He chased me after I turned down his love and affection. It was terri-bull.”

Charlie grimaces. “Oh my God. That is so scary. I hate guys that don’t get the hint. Like if a girl says no just get over yourself.” He sighs. “If anyone tries that around me I’ll kick their nerdy ass.”

“I’d love too see that. But I can count on you?”

Charlie nods. “Totally. I’m yours.”

Allan’s eyes go big. “Damn, you know, you really turn me on when you act tuff and protective of me.”

Charlie puffs out his chest. “You got yourself a body building champ here. You’re lucky.”

Allan giggles. “Damn right I am.”

The waiter hands the dessert to Allan, with two dessert forks. Another server comes to give them the drinks.

“Thank you,” Charlie says as they walk away. They start eating the cake, looking at each other happily.

“Here’s to two months being together,” Allan says, hitting their forks together.

“It’s been a hell of a journey. I have enjoyed this more than I ever imagined… being with you, I mean. You keep choosing me and I don’t know why but I really, lo—-I am so grateful for you.”

Allan heard the slip for a second and felt warm. “Same here. I really appreciate you too.”

“Hey, remember when we first announced our relationship and you said that thing about the boss not getting ideas?” Charlie recalls, making Allan nod with a curious look.

“Yeah, I do.”

“I know you told me what happened but I swear I was freaking out. I was like, is he gonna suggest a threesome? Haha.”

“It made you jealous. The whole not knowing what the context was. Right Charlie?”

Charlie rubs the back of his head, scratching nervously. “Well, it was the beginning of our relationship. Things were so shaky at first.”

“You were sweet.”

“It’s still crazy that you and the boss did that one thing. When we were at his cabin on our work vacation? That was wild.”

Allan shrugs. “I just like licking things. He had cookie crumbs on his stomach. It was relaxing. And you and Pim were hiking anyway.”

“Do you have some sort of oral fixation? Like you seem to have one, from how you talk to me sometimes.”

Allan nods. “Yeah. That’s obviously my thing.”

Charlie stutters, blushing dark red. “Did you like de-dessert?”

“Yes, you dirty thinking yellow man,” Allan whispers.

“Let’s get outta here,” Charlie says in a low, musky tone.

“It’s a hundred bucks an hour if you want to get personal,” Allan teases.

“Look, I know you’re dressed like Julia Roberts but you don’t have to play the part that well…”

“You couldn’t afford me..”

Charlie scoffs, laughing lightly. He gets the waiter to give them the bill, paying quickly, then taking Allan by the hand, they scurry out of the restaurant.

“Happy anniversary! Have a wonderful night!” The hostess yells to them as they leave.

Charlie blushes darker as Allan says to her, “Thannks for having my back sis!”

“No prob sis!”