Salubrious part 14

“I’m calling the police, Charlie,” Pim said as Charlie vomited, still crying.

Charlie gagged, wiping his mouth and face with his sleeve harshly. His guts felt twisted inside, as he kept replaying what happened in his head over and over. That last scream sounded like Allan…

“Agh, Pim, we need to go back upstairs to Allan’s apartment to make sure he’s okay.”

Charlie’s eyes looked red and puffy, and Pim started dialing 911, saying to him, “I know, I’m worried too, but… hi, hello, yes, I need, we need police and maybe… an..” Pim turned his back to Charlie saying softer, “Ambulance to..”

Charlie heard Pim giving out Allan’s address and all the rest of the crazy situation, feeling woozy and still on a high from the stress.

Pim was still on the phone as he covered it slightly to talk to Charlie, “They’re on the way. They’ll be here soon.”

“Dude, do you realize how puny and pathetic that guy looked? I mean I got some actual weight on me, I should’ve just .. you know, ugh….”

“Don’t beat yourself up, Charlie. It won’t help Allan now,” Pim said softly, looking down.

Charlie frowned, “I shouldn’t just .. at least I could’ve tackled the guy and let you and Allan run out… damnit.”

His face twisted in grief, thinking of Allan actually being injured or worse…

Allan stabbed… or Allan bleeding, unconscious…or..

Charlie grabbed onto the top of a fire hydrant, gripping it as if it were his anchor to reality. The thought feels like a dried up banana peel, feeling something inside of himself break, violently pushing the thought away as tears leak from his eyes.

“I-..I just left,” Charlie said with a slight uncontrollable sob that hit his chest.

“I suck.” He covered his face, saying in a self-conscious tone as he saw Pim looking at him, “Don’t look at me. I’m not crying… I’m just.. there’s something in my eye.”

“Allan wouldn’t like you talking about yourself like that. And it is okay to cry,” Pim said, trying to smile but it felt weak. “Don’t worry, the police will come arrest that horrible man and we’ll all go out and have a wonderful time and…”

Charlie heard someone on the phone before he could respond and Pim started talking, “Yes I’m still here. The guy was like four foot nine, I think, he was blue, light blue, very skinny and was scarily holding a long bloody knife, wearing a broken goblin costume… of course I’m serious! This is a dangerous situation. He went crazy just because he wanted to hang out with our best friend!”

Charlie rolled his eyes, taking in a breath.

He heard sirens blaring from the distance. Suddenly between the soft conversation of Pim and the ambulance siren, he saw the police pull up.

“Hey you!” A police officer yelled at Charlie. Charlie frowned, looking confused.

“Me? What? Me?” He repeated.

The police officer got out his cruiser, looking at him angrily. “I ain’t looking at no one else, am I?”

Charlie snorted, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Oh you think you’re some kind of wise guy, huh?” The police officer put his hand on the holster of his gun. Charlie put his hands up suddenly.

Pim realized what was happening and yelled, “Stop officers! Charlie didn’t commit any crime or break any laws! Please, can you help out our friend upstairs? He’s being held hostage in his own apartment!”

The officier’s partner gets out of the car, “Do we have a problem, Lampano?” He said to his partner.

“No, but this guy is about to get himself in a world of hurt if he doesn’t shape up his attitude,” the officer shook his head toward Charlie, giving his partner a slight nod.

Lampano nodded back. “So, what the hell is going on?” He asked Pim, pulling him to the side. Charlie was in disbelief by the reaction of the cops.

“What did I do wrong exactly?” Charlie asked carefully to the first officer to question him. “I.. Can you two please go check upstairs, I’m really worried about the safety of my friend. A guy with a knife threatened us and…”

“We’re waiting for backup, punk,” the officer replied.

Charlie gripped the fire hydrant again, gritting his teeth. “Hey, I’m not a punk. I am a law abiding citizen here—.”

“Not from where I’m standing,” the officer muttered.

Charlie shook his head, putting his hands up. “What the hell?”

“He was doing it again Lampano! Gritting his teeth and vandalizing public property!”

His partner looked over still getting Pim’s story. “Just arrest his yellow ass! We’ll deal with him later!”

The cop nodded. “Put your hands behind your back! No funny business!”

Charlie overheard heavy protests from Pim as another two police cruisers pulled up, haphazardly parking near the apartment complex. Several new officers started running into the building.

“Dude I didn’t vandalize anything! I was just trying to not to faint! I’ve been throwing up!”

The cop started putting Charlie in handcuffs. “Faint from doing too many hard drugs I bet. Like that damn angel dust.”

Charlie would have laughed from the insanity that was occurring, but was still hyper aware of the potential consequences of leaving Allan. He was silently relieved there were finally some officers on the scene actually actively investigating the situation.

He saw Pim panicking, looking at Charlie worriedly, doing something on his phone.

As he placed on the side of the police car, hands put in tight handcuffs, he heard a clatter of metal, thumps of what sounded like furniture and more yelling coming from the apartment building.

Charlie bit his lip, he couldn’t handle it anymore. “Please, officer, can you please tell me if Allan is okay. Please? Please?” He begged. “Can you use your radio to check in on what’s happening?”

The officer gave him a warning glare, but saw the yellow man about to faint again, as he was shaking and stumbling.

Charlie felt helpless and stupid being arrested for nothing, and the fact that Allan was upstairs all alone without a real friend made him burst into tears. This softened the officer a bit.

He moved over to help Charlie from falling, “They are.. it’s a complicated situation…” he heard some static on the radio, saying, “What’s the situation? Did you apprehend the suspect?”

More static, then, “We are currently in pursuit.”

The cop suddenly turned around to look at Charlie, “What does your friend look like?”

“He’s tall. Red. Skinny,” he blurted out, looking miserable as his tears flowed out. “He… is wearing black pants and a black and white pinstriped shirt.”

The cop nodded, saying into the radio, “Is the man upstairs in black within view?”

Before the radio could answer, another car pulled up. A familiar man came out.

“Mr. Boss?” Charlie blinked.

Pim looked at Charlie, giving him a thumbs up. Charlie sighed. Of course Pim called their boss like that would solve everything.

“Whoa, whoa, just what in Tarantino-tarnation happened here?” Mr. Boss said, surveying the chaotic scene. “Charlie, Pim! Where’s Allan?!”

Charlie was weak from vomiting and crying. Pim ran over, talking to the boss.

“We got accosted by Allan’s crazy landlord and Allan is upstairs all alone with that insane person! Charlie got arrested!” Pim explained.

Mr. Boss looked at his employee in handcuffs, disturbed.

“Why’s my boy all cuffed up here, officer?” Mr. Boss asked the officer in a puffed up voice.

“He was caught vandalizing public property with disorderly conduct.”

Mr. Boss smoothed his hair and cleared his throat, moving up to shake the officer’s hand. The officer brightened.

“I’m the owner, idea-maker, manager and proprietor of the Smiling Friends, good sir, nice to make your acquaintance.” They shook hands. Charlie was blurry from the crying and vomiting, but had wide eyes watching the encounter going more smoothly than he could ever hope for.

As Mr. Boss smooth talked to the cop, it took all but ten seconds for the officer to uncuff Charlie, apologize and then proceed to continue chatting with his boss happily.

Suddenly, he saw a stretcher with a red foot coming out of the building. The stress of it all was too intense.

Charlie felt incredibly dizzy, fainting from the exhaustion.