Roses

I woke up to the smell of roses today. They weren't just any roses, they were special roses. The kind of roses we get for special events. We don't buy this type of rose often, the last time we bought one was when I was a little kid. I remember walking into the hospital with those flowers in my hand. I don't remember much after that, but the idea of me getting to hold a bouquet of flowers stuck with me. I felt like I had the most important gift, the most important responsibility. I've always had a thing for flowers. That's what made my relationship with my mother stronger. Every evening I would come home to see my mom in the garden. I had my own tasks so I felt like I was really contributing to the garden. To this day, my favorite type of flower is Bloodroots. They are so beautiful despite their horrendous name.

There are many reasons to give out roses, the typical scenario is a lover appearing at your door with roses. I've always imagined myself handing out the roses instead. I purchase some roses and I walk around the park handing out a rose to everyone to make their day a bit better, this is my ideal scenario. I've never actually done it, but maybe I will soon. Maybe today is the day I can get out of my bed and hand out roses like the ones in my room right now. I hate being negative, but I highly doubt I'll be able to get out of bed soon. I wish my mother could be here, we could talk about flowers and nature and our long-awaited adventure to go out into the woods. There are so many things I could've done in my life.

The room is still filled with the scent of roses, but the room is getting louder and louder. I wish I could sit up to see who's sitting on the edge of my bed. I would love to thank everyone who visited me today. In the corner of my eye, I can see everyone surrounding me with tears in their eyes. I can hear them sniffing and them talking over each other trying to put a sentence together without their voice cracking. I look over to the white rose placed in the vase on my nightstand. I shut my eyes, once again knowing I won't be able to wake up to the smell of roses tomorrow.