Purple Mountain Train

“I… can’t see… can I?” I have no idea who I was talking to. Was I alone? I feel so off. Wait, I can see, it’s just so… so weird. Man, this train is really moving. Oh gosh, I really don’t feel good. I’m looking at my hands but they don’t look real. It looks like my hand is resting on my stomach, but I don’t feel it there. I begin patting myself down. As I touch each part of my body each part begins to feel a little more real, a little more solid? Is that the feeling I’m trying to describe? Why do I not feel solid? This train, I’ve heard of high-speed trains but I hadn’t realized they go this fast. I close my eyes and try to push my body down into the seat. I just feel the need to make sure I’m really here in this train. It kind of feels like I’m not. This may sound crazy but I feel like I’m here, but wasn’t here a few minutes ago. I feel like I’m struggling to hold on to reality. I’m on a train, I feel like I should have a ticket? Maybe that will tell me where I’m going. Hmmm… no, I don’t feel anything in my pockets.

My boyfriend hates flying, he hates spending so much time going through security and bag check. He’s spent so much time in his life in airports, I can imagine how difficult it must be. He prefers the train; you just get on and go. No TSA patting you down because you’re injured and can’t lift your arms above your head. He must have decided we’re going on a trip. But where and why? I feel around again for a ticket, but find nothing. Oh! Maybe on my phone. Yup, there it is in my email. We’re trying to get from Spain to Italy. The ride is a little longer, but he says the hassle is a lot less. I guess it equals out in the end. I’m just sitting here contemplating the way I’m feeling and trying to figure out if he’s right. Is it even worth saving the hassle if you wake up from a nap feeling like this? I just feel so awful right now, I can’t even describe how I’m feeling. I’ve never felt like this before. I do agree that long wait times can be a hassle in the airport. And the way your ears feel when they just won’t pop… sometimes it’s unbearable. But this… is awful. I feel like my stomach was somewhere else and just popped right back into my body. Being on an airplane never made me feel this way. I think. I don’t know. My brain feels fuzzy. Thoughts are slipping in and out of my head. I have ADHD it happens sometimes. Thoughts are there one second, and gone when I try to open my mouth and share them.

One time I had gotten into a car accident like a day and a half before getting on an international flight. I didn’t think I was injured that badly from the accident and I was expected home. I thought I would just tough it out. But as the flight took off, I suddenly felt how bruised up I really was. My knee had hit the dashboard of the car in the accident and most of my weight (and I’m a big girl) had mostly met on one point in the seatbelt just above my left lung. A little bruising from the lap belt as well, but most of my weight met at one impact point on the upper seat belt. As the plane sped down the runway, I suddenly felt all the pressure all over again. It was awful. But this, I never imagined a train could make me feel so weird. And why was it going to fast? Why don’t I feel like me? I don’t normally have a flat belly.

I mean, I’ve been on a monorail before and thought that was pretty fast, but this just doesn’t seem real. I’m afraid to open my eyes again. Maybe I’ll just sit here for a bit longer with my eyes closed. I’m starting to feel a little more present in my seat. Less nauseous. I take a few more deep slow breaths. In the nose, out the mouth. Like I’m meditating. Ok. I can do this I think to myself. I slowly open my eyes. I realize that I can in fact see, but there seems to be something wrong with my brain. I can’t grasp what I’m seeing. It’s like that scene in that candy movie, everything is just wonky. It looks, smells, and feels real, but it just can’t be so. Did I hit my head? Maybe I hit my head real hard and I have brain damage. Everything just looks so wrong; I can’t get the concept of what it is I’m looking at.

Wait, where is everyone? I’m alone in what looks to be a sleeping car. What time is it? I look at my watch but the hour hand is missing. How is that possible? The watch isn’t broken, the minute hand is there. Man, I paid a lot for this hybrid watch. I wanted to count my steps but still look classy. But somehow the hour hand just comes out of the enclosed watch? Cheap crap. Damn.

The door slides open and slams into the pocket. A hairy figure steps through… is that… no… is that… a centaur? Should I just close my eyes again? Yeah, I’m just going to close my eyes again. “Brianne, thank the gods you’re awake! How are you feeling? Are you all in one piece? Talk to me? Wait, can you talk? Please tell me you can talk!” I heard my boyfriend talking, but was afraid to open my eyes and see the centaur again. Do I dare? Something was wrong with my brain. My eyes seemed fine, I could still see clearly, but nothing I was looking at made any sense. The colors were all off. There was a strange haze over everything. I could kind of remember where I was but not how I got here or why I was here. The only clearly recognizable thing in this whole scenario was the sound of his voice.

“Eric, stop. Slow down. She doesn’t even seem really ‘here’ yet.” Cierra? Was she here too? Why did she stress the word ‘here’ so much? I’m here, I’m right here. All in one piece.

Was I here? I feel not quite anywhere. Ok, I’m going to open my eyes again.

Nope. Centaur. Closing my eyes again. “I don’t know what’s really going on here, but my brain is acting up. My eyes are seeing, but they’re not working right. Eric looks like a centaur and there is this weird purple haze over everything. I don’t even feel like my body is all with me here. I’m feeling so sick. I’m afraid to open my eyes. I’m sounding crazy.”

“You’re right Brianne. Maybe you should just relax and keep your eyes closed.” I could hear Cierra coming and sitting next to me. She took one of my hands into her hands and held it in her lap. “Brianne you’re not all here. And here isn’t really the ‘here’ you would be inclined to expect.”

“You’re not making any sense Cierra.” I turned my head away.

“None of this makes sense but bear with me. How much do you remember?”

I slowly answer, “Nothing. I don’t really even remember you. I somehow know you’re Cierra but I don’t know how I know you. And Eric? I remember his voice and I remember he’s not supposed to be a centaur. I also remember he’s my boyfriend. But I don’t remember anything else about him. How we met? How old he is? I don’t even remember how old I am. I can see that we’re on a train. And that somehow reminded me that Eric doesn’t like planes. But it’s like my memories are here inside my brain but I can’t get to them.”

Cierra squeezed my hands real tight. “Oh honey, I’m going to keep this real simple. I’m afraid giving you too much information right now is just going to be bad. We’re on a train headed east. But the train shifted into another dimension. Another dimension is not the best way to describe it, but I’m trying to keep it simple for you.”

Eric turned to her, “No Cierra, I think you should tell her. You’re going to have to in order for her to understand what is happening to her body.”

“Ok, simple version. There is an equal plain of existence parallel to our world. It’s almost identical. It’s the same place, and it exists in the same place, and the same when, but it’s not the same place. It’s a magic version of our world. Are you with me?”

I want to open my eyes. I can’t decide. Will it help me understand what’s going on? “Eric, I’m scared. I don’t even know whether or not to open my eyes. I don’t trust my brain.”

I think I can hear Eric coming closer but it sounds weird. It sounds like 4 feet, but like they’re clogging toward me, not stepping. “Brianne, we’re here for you. Only open your eyes when you’re ready not a minute sooner. You’ll know when you’re comfortable enough to do so. We’re both here for you.”

“Ok they’re staying closed. Now tell me whey I feel like a radio station stuck between two channels.”

Silence.

“Well?”

Cierra hugged me. “You kind of hit the nail on the head. You are kind of stuck between two channels. And so is the train.” I could feel what felt like a hairy hand on my shoulder in the direction of Eric’s strange breathing. I’m sure you’ve noticed how fast we’re going.”

I keep touching my stomach for some reason. It just doesn’t feel the same. “That seems to be the only thing I’m actually sure of. This train is bolting. Is that why I feel so sick?”

“Brianne, listen. If there ever was a time in your life that you believed in magic, now is that time. You see, there has been a shifting. We went through the mountains and there was this weird glow and everything kind of flickered a bit. You and the train flickered the longest. It doesn’t seem you’re entirely here nor there.”

My eyes shot open. Yup, there is definitely a centaur in the room. “I have no idea what you’re saying, but what I do know is that this train is going too fast. Maybe let’s worry about that first. Who’s driving this thing anyway?”

The centaur looked down nervously, “Um some Spanish guy, but he seems a little freaked out and not really doing anything. But that’s not even the worst part. Do you hear that squeal? That metal-on-metal sound as the train rounds the curve? That’s a sign that the train is moving faster than it is designed to.”

“Eric?” This train is going so fast. I’m so confused. Why does Eric look like a centaur? Focus Brianne. No one is driving this train and it’s speeding down the rail.

“Yes, it’s me Brianne. Somehow, I became a centaur in the shift. It’s kind of neat actually, I have always admired them as a fictional creature. I’m still trying to figure out how to walk with 4 legs, but if I’m stuck this way I’m going to run through a field at top speed like a horse. Somehow it feels like, I don’t know, natural? Comfortable? Like I was supposed to be this way all along? A little hairy, but other than that way better than my human body.” The train starts squealing again, it’s piercing right through the conversation. “We really have to figure out what to do about the train. Cierra knows a little bit about trains. We’re going down to the Locomotive cab. If you think you can make it, you should come too. You’re the smart one.”

I still feel weird, like I can touch my hand to my body but I don’t feel it. However, I don’t think that’s stopping me from moving. I seem to get up ok. “Yeah, I think I can make it. Whoa!” My hand seems to slip into the arm of the chair as I push up, but then gets forced right back out. I follow them down to the locomotive cab. There is a guy in the cab yelling in Spanish. He’s just pacing around.

“My Spanish isn’t that great, whatever I’ve learned in school seems to be ineffective. I have no idea what this guy is yelling about. He seems to be confused about liquid.” Eric usually likes to show off his language skills but right now he just seems frustrated.

“Look, right there is the brake stand, but it looks a little strange.” Cierra points out. “Little bits and pieces of the train looks the way Brianne does. Unfortunately, that includes the brake stand. See, this lever here…”

“HELP!! Guys, why am I seeing the outside of the train?” I feel like I can’t breathe, the air is whooshing past me, I definitely feel like I’m outside the train! I feel them grab my hands and pull me back in. “I was just leaning against the wall here and sort of just slipped through. I have to sit down. I think I’m going to faint. I feel like I have no blood left in my body. Suddenly hanging halfway out of a train kind of makes a person feel queasy.” I drop to the floor and make a sloppy thud sound like a pile of wet cloths dropping on the floor.

“This guy is shouting about liquid again; he’s pointing at you and the breaks.” Eric leans in for a closer look. “I think what he’s trying to say is, the breaks aren’t working because they’re acting like liquid. Or fluid maybe, my Spanish isn’t so great. Maybe it’s leaking something?”

Cierra pops over, “No, there is no liquid in these brakes. Reduced air pressure engages the brakes, and increased air releases them. Maybe he means the train is caught between two channels as well. You and I seem to be all here, although, I’m not sure where here is. It looks like the same country side we were traveling on, but everything is different. I was watching the track as we went through the mountains before everything started to change. There was a strange disturbance in the air and when I looked back at you, you were a hairy centaur. Everything kind of flickered for a bit including you. When we got through the mountains Brianne and the train were both still flickering. The mountains never changed, they just looked like a different color. I think we crossed in to another dimension of some sort. But I think Cierra and the train didn’t quite make it.” She seemed to be fiddling with the breaks.

I feel so drained. I’m just laying here like a lump and feeling like all of the blood drained out of my body. I’m like so hungry but way too nauseous to eat. “Guys, I’m… just gonna… sleep…”

“Brianne! You gotta wake up! Brianne! We have to get off the train!” The Spanish guy was standing behind Cierra flailing his arms and yelling. Cierra was trying to help get me up, Eric was crouched down next to me. “Brianne, you have to get up. At least try to pull yourself onto Eric’s back. We have to find a way off the train. This guy here just showed me through binoculars that the track ahead is broken. If we keep going, we’ll go right off the track and into that ravine over there.”

“No mom, I’m not going to school today, my fairie aunts are taking me for a lesson in the forest today. Dad said it’s ok, he put a spell in the classroom so everyone thinks the class frog is me so I’m in attendance”

“Brianne, I have no idea what you’re talking about but you need to get on my back right now, we have to get off this train. It’s going to go into the ravine because we can’t stop it. The breaks won’t engage, they’re like you, caught between to channels and they’re not making contact.”

I started babbling, “Mom, why do you sound so hairy? Did I eat the wood cake again? I hate getting splinters in my mouth, but the fairie connection is my favorite place to be and wood cake is so much easier to make than trying to gather enough mana to vibe there. The side effects sometimes though, wow. You do sound kinda hairy mom.”

“Brianne, I’m not your mother.” Eric protested, “And how does someone sound hairy? Never mind that, you need to get on my back. We found these inflatable kayaks in the front of the train in the luggage car. We’re going to tie them together and hope they’re enough of a cushion to keep us from dying when we roll them out of the train.”

“Mom, that sounds like that stupid egg experiment we tried in 6th grade. Half the eggs cracked. I don’t want my yolk to spill, think of all the mana I’ll need to piece myself back together. You’re so hairy mom. Wow I’m so hungry.”

The Spanish guy is still yelling. I feel so drained. I need to eat something. If he could just shut up for one second, I could try to get up the strength to find something to eat. When did I vibe here? Wait, I’m not finished I’m still stuck between the human connection and the fairie connection. Why is everyone tugging at me?

Cierra’s hands slipped off my arms and she went flying into the wall and hit with a thud. “God you way a ton Brianne, why are you so heavy right now? You’re like 110-pound middle school student but you feel like a lead weight. You’re not even made of the same stuff we are any more. When we started this trip, you were like 200 pounds but somewhere amid the flickering you like shrank or something. Yet you somehow weigh twice as much. Eric, I’m not even sure you’re going to be able to carry her if we get her on your back. We’re just going to have to get her into the kayak and drag her that way.”

“Mom, that kayak thing is a stupid idea, you know that. The mana alone to keep us alive isn’t worth the cost. We should just stop the train. If I could just get the strength to get to my backpack, I could take out a wood cake.” The Spanish guy is yelling again, he’s giving me a headache.

“Eric!” Cierra yelled, “You have to help me pull her.”

He tried to tug on my arms, “Why does she keep calling me mom? And what’s a wood cake?”

“Eric, we don’t have time for this, we have to get off this train. NOW!”

“Y’know, her mom always gave me this weird hippie vibe.” He was still struggling to even move me an inch. “She hasn’t seen her mom and a very long time; says she’s travelling the world to teach a bunch of kids about vibing. Like, does that really need to be taught?”

“Eric, NOW!” Brianne is desperately trying to pull me into the Kayak.

“Cierra, she’s right, we’ll crack like eggs. Y’know, I always thought she was just being imaginative when she talked about stories about her mom, but now that I’m a centaur, I’m starting to rethink all those stories she was telling me. Maybe they’re real? She always has these weird little blocks of wood in her backpack packaged like little snack cakes. Do you think that is what she’s talking about?”

This Spanish guy won’t stop yelling. I have zero energy, but maybe I can roll over toward my backpack.

“Oye espanol lo conseguimos, todos nos vamos a morir! Man he just won’t shut up.” The Spanish guy is now trying to get into one of the kayak cases we created. At least he stopped yelling. I have to fix this before he tries to jump. I’m so confused. I swear I was talking to my mother a second ago, but now this Centaur who sounds like Eric is yelling in Spanish? “Cierra look, she’s trying to get to her backpack. I’m going to find those silly little blocks she’s always carrying and see if they’re what she’s looking for.” Eric quickly rummages through my back and pulls out the wood cakes. He tosses the wrapper and tries to shove it in my mouth.

“Stop, what are you doing?” I manage to get out with a mouth full of wood, “Why would you put wood in my mouth? Actually, that’s kind of tasty. Why does the wood taste so good? Flavored wood? Where did my mom go?”

“Your mom was never here. Just trust me, I think you’re supposed to eat that.” He pushed more into my mouth.

“Actually, I do feel kind of better. A little splintery but it has a nice crunch.”

Cierra rushes over, “Eric, I think it’s working. Look, she looks better already.”

I’m looking down at my body and I seem to be glowing purple. I am starting to feel a little more solid now.

The Spanish guy is sealing himself up. He just keeps shaking his head and whispering, ‘Toda vamos a morir,’ and smiling.

“Stop him, I’ve got an idea, everyone eat a wood cake.” Eric takes the cakes and gives one to Cierra. He tries to give one to the Spanish guy, but he just laughs in his face. Eric shoves it in his mouth. He tries to spit it out, but seems pleasantly surprised by the taste. Everyone chews and swallows. Eric seems to be glowing a greenish color with a hint of purple. Cierra and the Spanish guy aren’t really glowing, but they have a yellow/purple aura around them “Great, everyone put your hands on the break stand.”

The whole things starts glowing purple. You can start to see through the train as the whole brake system lights up. “Everyone try and picture the brake system working. Clear your heads of everything else, like they teach us in Yoga. You can even breath like we do in Yoga if it helps clear your mind. Imagine the lever being pulled and the air pressure releasing. Imagine all the needed parts moving to get the break to engage. Picture the wheels stopping and the train slowing. Just relax and focus.”

“Grab the lower lever and pull!” everyone stops and stares at the Spanish guy wondering why he’s suddenly speaking English “What? Is there wood in my teeth? Quickly, pull!”

“It’s the wood cakes.” I say. “We can understand each other now.” Eric grabs the lower lever and pulls with all his might.

The Spanish guy grabs the upper lever. “Ah hell, pull both just to be sure.”

Everything starts connecting and every wheel in the train is screeching as we slowly come to a stop. The Spanish guy grabs the Chock blocks and jumps out of the cab. We all follow him out as he places them. “You can’t be too careful.” After he places them, he flops face first on to the ground and starts kissing the ground and acting like he’s hugging it. He gets up and starts to hug all of us.

Different magical creatures begin to emerge from the rest of the cars. There are other centaurs, and other fairies like myself. Some are still human. Magical creatures of many different shapes and sizes. One car toward the back is pretty much split wide open as a family of Ogres trudges out.

The Spanish guy suddenly stops in his tracks and turns bright red. “I forgot about passengers, I panicked and tried to save myself. I’m supposed to go down with the ship. Please don’t tell anyone I tried to jump.”

We all laugh and begin to circle together in one big hug. “It’s ok Gabriel, your secret is safe with us, you were a hero in the end. We all were. We all helped save the day.”

“how did you know my name?”

“I’m a fairie. Knowledge is fluid to us. It just comes when we need it. I know your name because you’re a hero now. We’ll need to know what name to put in the history books.” I smiled and walked away leaving him to let that all sink in.