New Virus Detected in America

While still reeling from the world-wide effects of COVID-19, the Center for Disease Control (CDC) has issued a medical alert regarding another in a long list of highly contagious and potentially dangerous viruses. These new viruses can be transmitted orally, by hand, visually and even electronically. A facilitating agent for transmission of the virus, is considered, also to be governmental and corporate stupidity and greed. The virus has been aptly named the Weekly Overload Recreation Killer (WORK) virus. Ground zero for the start-up of this virus has been narrowed down to a location somewhere between 1599 and 1601 Pennsylvania Avenue in the city of Washington, D.C. in America. It seems that a person (or persons) in that specific area has been attempting to spread the virus to many parts of America and the world through insistence that the citizens of (at least) America (especially the elderly) prepare to undergo daily and/or regular contact with WORK beginning as soon as yesterday. It is very likely that WORK has already been contracted by some corporate bosses and employers and that they, in turn, are prime candidates to spread this very dangerous virus to others in their own business environments. The CDC strongly recommends that all citizens of America, and indeed North America and the World, should distance themselves as far as possible from WORK at this particular stage of the present global crisis. If, for example, your own boss attempts to transmit WORK to you, or if you suspect that any of your colleagues are extending efforts to put you in contact with WORK, via any means, immediately vacate those premises and take shelter right away in your own home. One should also avoid opening electronic messages or responding to telephone calls that may attempt to coerce you back into the WORK-infested environment any time in the indefinite future.

Perhaps one bright spot in all of this, according to the CDC, is that, unlike the lengthy trial periods associated with COVID-19 virus vaccinations, the WORKNOW-B48 virus already has several effective antidotes in place. These self-administered medications are actually not only effective, but virtually “No-Fail”. They have also stood the test of time in ongoing trials over the past several decades if not longer. So, there is no need to worry about Food and Drug Administration Regulations and your own personal safety while in the midst of self-medication. The first medication can be obtained at any liquor store and can be found in the section named – Work Increase Nullifying Elixir (WINE for short). Anybody who is overly-concerned with coming in contact with WORK should purchase, perhaps, one or two cases of both the red and the white forms of the elixir. The second medication recommended by the CDC can also be obtained at the same location as the first (to help you with your human-contact-reduction efforts). This medication can be found in the aisle marked – Bothersome Employer Effect Removal (BEER). Again, it is recommended that citizens purchase several cases of any variety of BEER. These two antidotes should be taken repeatedly upon arrival back at home. Medication should continue until threats of WORK no longer seem possible or until WORK has been completely eliminated from one’s system. If neither of these two medications are available, there is one further CDC-recommended cure for WORK. It can be found in certain shops (depending on one's country, state or city) or from street-corner vendors. It is referred to as Work Enabling Elimination Drug (WEED). As many as four bags are recommended to begin with. Then, after several days of constant and repeated intake of WEED, WORK will not pose such a threat and will no longer be an issue.

In summary, it should be pointed out that those who have already come in contact with WORK and who continue to do so, are at a relatively much higher risk of contracting COVID-19 as well. The CDC feels that if WORK has made its way into your life that it is just a matter of time before COVID-19 also takes control of things. So, the final message should be expressed. If one wants to avoid contracting COVID-19, one should start by avoiding the hazardous effects of WORK.