My first love

I was 16years old when I started having feelings for a particular guy ,i never new what love was all about but I new for sure that I had a thing for him,he was in his early 20’s

While I was just sixteen and my parents were always against me as a girl coming closer to any man,but I decided to play every bit of it with calmness and confidence .

So one faithful day I decided to go get fed for our goat at home,and I met him on the way,and immediately my heart started beating fast and yea he never new I liked him,but i felt he liked me to

I exchanged greetings with him and then moved to my way,he called me back and asked me where I was headed,I told him and he decided to give a 🦵 leg,which he ended up asking me to be his girlfriend,and I told I was going to think about it.

Afterwards I thought of it and asked myself if I was ready to date someone,I then decided to go into the relationship because I already liked him alot.

We started dating and we never had s*x because I was still a virgin and I was ready to keep it too,he understood me and never asked for it,but he was cheating on me with different girls ,and when ever I asked he did tell me I wasn’t ready for s*x so he did get it from other girls instead,and I do feel bad about it until when I turned 18 I decided to break my virginity and let him have me.

I could say it was a horrible experience because it was really painful and I asked if that’s what other girls act like enjoying it,but he kept telling me it was a painful pleasure and I did believe him.

I could remember those nights I did leave my bed to sit outside and wait for him to show up and I will sneak out to go see him,all I could say is that I remember enjoying every bit of my moments with him

Most of the times my dad will want to go check up on me in the bed but wouldn’t see me and he will come out to check if he did see me,and if i noticed his movement I will go back home and pretend to be busy or something ,i loved this guy till I left for college and everything changed,we barely talked and even if we see each other it’s basically on occasional visits,it wasn’t funny and I found out he was already inlove with another girl ,who he told me that he doesn’t know who to choose between me and her.

I had no choice than to leave him and I did but i still love him and I let him move on with his other lover because I couldn’t see myself sharing the person I loved with another person it hurts a-lot

But I’m super glad because I did and I got to move on and find a new love ❤️