Mothers'

Today is a special day for all mothers'. The years culmination of a grand event called motherhood. I never really knew how much i appreciated my mother, until this day. And when this day comes to an end, I will know that it will be all for naught. Watching this scene play out like a short end of a mozzarella branch.

Yesterday I told my mother that I always wanted to be a nun. She had no idea that I was going to share that with her. It made her upset, upset enough to not listen at first. And then I would listen to the commiserating of her soul. Partially wanting to not tell her at all. And partially wanting to forget about this whole revelation myself.

She got over her sudden spell of agitation. She then told me me that her incentive for not listening was a sudden distaste of nunnery. It led her to believe that I was going to waste my life over it. And become the laughing stock of the family. I simply told her that this was what I had always wanted to do.

It became a reason to express myself distastefully. To lead my life into the meditation of a lifetime. A plush sentiment of a lifestyle that I could not forget. Or even begin to enjoy now that my mother knew my secret. I will not let this eat into my consciense. I wasn't going to let this spasm break me down into a colorful response.

The flower of truth was about to spread. Spreading into something that I cared immensely about. This was either going to make me or break me, and I was not going to let that happen without a fight. It gave me great pleasure and incentive to let my mind wrap around this tale.

Now, my mother loves me beyond compare and that is all that I have to have. But that did not change the fact that I wanted to tell her my story. A story that might seem silly to you, but it's very important to me to tell it. It gives me satisfaction and clears my conscious at the same time.

My mother was also a nun in her past life, before she had me, and I believe that was another reason why I wanted to become one. Although I don't think men can become nuns? Maybe that is why they are called monks. That would be the male version of it. I agree. It can become confusing. Not only for me but for you, dear reader. But hopefully you will read the story with me.

Now I know that in your mind I could never become what I had always wanted to become. But that will not stop me from trying to remember why I want this in my life. I am so glad that I have the support structure to become what I treasure in life. Otherwise it would all be for naught.

In this twisted world, this would be my only escape, not to mention, yours' as well. It may seem like a true story, but it is not. It's is only an extension of the paranoid feelings in my life. Something that will quell the feelings of a lost soul. And intertwine it with a reality that I can tangibly call my own. Another reason to let go of my negative feelings toward life in general. So thank you reader, for taking the time to listen to me rant about why it is important to become a nun or in my case a monk.