Make yourself a fool and ask questions if you don't understand, you will learn more

Facing my brother, I thought of Su Yuanzhi - also not right, I mean, I don't know how to say it, anyway, this can be a bit of a shame.

"Nanyin, you let brother into the house, so cold weather -" Dad's voice came down from the balcony. Then mom also came out from the floor-to-ceiling window, both hands wet, probably rushed to wash off the flour, mom did not express surprise, nor did she show delight, she just said: "Tired, right? Dinner will be ready soon."

"Good, Third Aunt." He always exuded particularly comforting submissiveness when he spoke to my mother. Mom always told me that my brother's personality was very much like hers, sometimes adding, "He's the one who should be my child." --When I was in a bad mood, I associated all kinds of hateful things with me after this sentence, and then started to scold me.

I think that because my brother is not her child, she always sees all the good things in him. The kind of distance that cannot be seen or felt.

The New Year's Eve dinner was very lively, and my father and my younger uncle opened two bottles of wine that the family had been saving for years. Everyone, like me, tried their best to express that they were happy because they felt it was wrong to be unhappy at this time of year - and only at times like New Year's, they could also taste what I was tasting every day. Just thinking about it made me sincerely happy. Mom's cheeks were red from the alcohol, her eyes looked like they contained tears, and the smile on her face was different than usual, with a touch of capriciousness, "I'm so happy," she said in a sudden burst, as if to announce something, "Xidian is coming home, Dongni's store is booming, Nan Yin has finally decided to take the exams graduate school, and Bei Bei is healthy and smart - that's so good."

"You're the one who works the hardest." Little Uncle stood up at this time and lifted his cup, "We should all toast you."

"That's right." Sister also said with certainty. All the glasses were raised in an instant, and the arms stretched in mid-air were like a flock of birds that had received some kind of marching orders and were united in the direction of mom. Mom was like a little girl, proud and shy, "Don't be, I'm afraid of this kind of formal scene with my people-"

"Mom, do you want us to be happy if our people are not serious?" I know very well what kind of lines I should say to make people happy at such times. To be precise, I know exactly when people need me to make them happy. This kind of thing is difficult to say, sometimes I do not know what I say to make them feel cute, but sometimes I know, I choose the part I "know", with different scenes, using the same logic to replicate, you can often make people laugh.

It was at this point that Beibei moved her tiny walker with great determination and "squeaked" towards the dining table. "Beibei, the baby," Chen Yan, who had probably been patient for too long, finally found a chance to show off Beibei, "Brother is back, Beibei, look, call 'brother', you can say it! --I buried my head to eat food, to prevent their expression to show the end, if I were her, beat me to death, I will not deliberately talk to my brother about Bei Bei - but then again, she should have thought about it long ago In fairness, I sometimes admire her.

North refused to hold the stage, refused to talk. Good boy. But she picked up one of the chopsticks on the table, just one, and held it out to her brother. --The world of babies is mysterious after all. "Is this your gift to me?" Brother laughed, "Thank you, Bei Bei." "No," my sister spoke up from the side, "she was trying to poke you."

Brother smiled lightly but did not turn his face to look at his sister.

I understood the sister's words, which were not serious and not like a joke. She sounded a bit muffled because she couldn't decide what kind of way to talk to her brother. She was trying to impress him, but she would never admit it to herself.

The sound of firecrackers exploded in everyone's ears - a flurry of sound, clamoring with an inexplicable passion as if vowing to shatter the glass of the whole house as much as they. Dad had to raise his voice and say, with what looked like great force, to the whole table, "Good New Year." I thought he was shouting as if we were not on land, but in the cabin of a ship bobbing on top of the waves.

Early in the morning of the first day of the year, I quietly got up and slipped into my brother's room. Just as I thought, he was already awake, staring at the ceiling in disbelief.

"Have you seen the red envelope?" I gently closed the door behind me, "Mom put it under your pillow last night, count it, I want to know if yours will be more than mine."

"You count it yourself." He owned up and moved to the side, giving up the pillow, his back against the wall, half sitting.

There was something in his eyes now that I couldn't quite put my finger on. At least I sometimes don't dare to look at him directly without fear like I used to. I had to keep my head down and count my money, pretending that nothing was wrong.

"Are you not going to see Su Yuanzhi today?" He asked me.

"Yes." I nodded, "Today I'm going to their house for dinner, tomorrow he's coming to our house - think about it, I can't eat at their house for dinner."

"If you don't want to go, don't go, it's not that kid's turn to order you around."

"When are you going back to Sichuan again?" I put the money back inside the red packet, thought about it, and drew out three more, "Mom gave you more than she gave me - no matter, I'll just redistribute it internally."

"So greedy for money." He gently hit my head, "not going, the school sent another teacher to replace me, I went back to class as usual after winter break."

"That's good."

"How are you all doing?" He asked me after a slight pause.

"Fine. My sister's store is doing crazy. It's weird," I raised my face, "no other store on College Road has as many people as her place, and she's beating the economic crisis."

"I want to move out." He looked at me seriously.

"Are you kidding me?" I shouted out, "No way, Mom would never approve! Do you know how mom packed your room when we moved? All your stuff, every single thing, mom made me write it down on a list, down to what goes in which drawer, which painting goes on which wall - don't you see that your room in this new house is the same as the original? That's how it came to be, and now you're talking about moving ......"

"I told you, this place is too far away from the school, it's not convenient to work can't it?" He picked up the cigarette case from the nightstand, pushed it open with his index finger, and stared at it as if he was deciding which of those identical-looking cigarettes to draw from inside.

"Don't worry, Mom will say, then give you Dad's car." I sighed, "It's going to be weird for you to suddenly say you're moving out like that."

He didn't answer, he just pressed the lighter down very hard.

I stared at the curtain, that the pattern on it was shrouded by the rising smoke, "I know ...... but, you also said at that time, or to act on ah, you people say move away, how else can you act? You can't," I bit my lip, "you can't pretend to know anything?"

He smiled slowly, "I can't."

Outside the door suddenly sounded Mom's exasperated voice, "Tell me clearly what you mean!" We both jumped at the same time, and I think we both winced at the same time, along with the unlucky glow of fire between his fingers. I jumped out of bed and opened the door, but there was no one outside, but Mom's voice was clearer as she walked angrily around the living room, phone in hand, "You're telling me you're emigrating now? You want to emigrate! You think I do not understand ah, immigration from beginning to end how to do more than a year, what have you been doing? You only now to tell me, the New Year's Eve you do not feel excessive ah ......"

Dad was helplessly repeating the phrase he always said, "You can't solve any problem by arguing with him, what can you solve like this?" However, Dad's voice was getting weaker and weaker, and in the end, it became talking to himself.

After Mom hung up the phone, she sat down on the couch looking tired. "What should we do?" She asked Dad. But it didn't seem like she was expecting any kind of answer.

"She looked at me, a little surprised, but her voice was back to its usual softness, "Awake?" Then she smiled helplessly and shook her head, "Your great uncle told me that they are emigrating and will be leaving in the middle of next month."

"Then let's go. Don't you want to leave?" I was confused.

"Stupid kid." She sighed incredulously, "They're not going to take your grandmother with them, they're sending her to us. I'm not mad about this, I'm mad that they're counting me out like this."

"That's too much ......" I got a little excited when I said that, the equivalent of watching a soap opera, I guess, "to treat your mother like that."

But I didn't expect it when my mom said, "Your grandmother she's just my mom alone."

Mom had never told me that story before.