Like Letters Written in the Sand Part Two

Anna-leis let herself melt into Clarence’s arms, as he held her, the tears flowing freely, she had been spending too long, not letting herself grieve, and it was catching up to her. But Clarence was there, by her side, as he had been for the last month, and the doctors said in just a couple of days, she’d be going home, continuing physical therapy as an outpatient, honestly she wasn’t sure she was ready for this. She had to worry about things like accessibility now, she’d ben needing the wheelchair, until her prosthetics came in, and then she would have to learn to walk with them. It was all going to take time, and it frustrated her.

“I don’t know how I am going to do this.” Anna-leis said, looking at Clarence, with a mixture of pain and love in her eyes. She could no longer deny her feelings for Clarence even to herself.

“I’ll tell you how you are not going to have to do this, you aren’t going to have to do this alone.” Clarence said.

“I know and I’m grateful, but there are things I have to figure out on my own. My career is over, I have to figure out what I’m going to do.”

“You’re still working on that true crime book, you’re other two were successful, and you’re good, you could pursue that.”

Anna-leis shrugged her shoulders, he brought up a good point, but she was hurting, and not able to express the emotions in the way anyone could understand, including herself.

“You don’t need to figure it all out now, all you have to know is you aren’t alone.”

“I want someone to love me, not a caregiver.” Anna-leis said sadly.

Anna-leis knew that if it weren’t for Clarence she would be left alone to figure it all out, and just the idea of having to be alone when the doctors told her they had to amputate.

She played with the ring on her finger, the one Clarence had placed on it, when he had proposed, a few days after she had woken up from the Coma, and received the life-changing news. She had argued at first, she wasn’t going to build a marriage out of pity, but that wasn’t the case, she knew that. Clarence loved her, and had for a long time, it had taken her nearly dying for her to own up to the fact that he not only had feelings for her, but the feelings were mutual, she had spent so long running away from being hurt, she’d nearly run head first into the walls, she had built up for protection.

Anna-leis would never forget the joy, and the smile that made her heart melt as she said yes, and for a moment she let herself forget where she was, forget that she was lying in the hospital bed. Unfortunately she’d be brought back to reality, and the pain she was in. A pain that was far easier to deal with, when she had Clarence by her side.

“I’m sorry Clarence.” Anna-leis said. “I’ve been running from us for far to long, and if I’ve hurt you in the process, I’m sorry.”

“Anna-leis none of that matters, right now, what matters is the love we have for one another, the fact that you are still here. I came far to close to loosing you, it reminded me of how many things I left unsaid. I never want to regret not telling you how much I love you.”

“I made mistakes too, I kept pushing you away, despite the fact, I loved you, but I was afraid to admit it, I love you now but I am done being afraid of my feelings, I’m done running from love.”

“Right now is what matters, you are what matters.”

Anna-leis smiled at him, shifting in the bed, soon she’d be at home in her own bed, a thought that both excited her and terrified her. She wanted to go home, but she was afraid of what would happen when she was alone and the phanthom pains hit her so hard, she could barely function. Clarence would move in with her after they were married and not before then. She was a woman of Faith, and he was a man of Faith, they would wait until they were married, something that she prayed would happen, when her prosthetics were on, and she was able to walk down the aisle, into the arms of the man she loved.

“I love you Anna-leis, I don’t care how you get down the aisle, just that you do. But I know how much this means to you.”

“Thank you for being so understanding Clarence, I want everything to be perfect or at least as perfect as it can be, considering all that happened, I could have never imagined that I would be facing this.” Anna-leis sat up, pointing to the wheelchair.”

“I know Dove, but nothing changes the fact that I love you, that you beautiful.”

“Clarence, I meant I need the chair, I need out of this bed.”

“I’m sorry.” Clarence said, as Anna-leis wrapped her arms around him, as he gingerly lowered her in the chair, bandages covering the surgical site , the level of amputation, in a few more days, she’d no longer need the bandages. Healing meant that soon as the swelling subsided, and the surgical wounds healed, she could start the fittings for her custom prosthetics. And the sooner that happened the sooner she and Clarence could get married.

~~~ To Be Continued