J

Hello?

Nobody answered. I don’t even know if I spoke it aloud.

Is anyone there?

Wait…I can’t move my lips. Come to think of it…I can’t open my eyes either.

I’m cold. So cold. At the same time, I’m completely fine. It’s registering that it’s cold, but I’m more numb than anything…wrapped in an icy blanket. Can I move? No. I should be panicking right now. But it’s…fine. I feel at peace. Just as I was starting to nestle into this form of existence, I heard muffled shouts,

“Over here! I found a hole!”

What? What hole? Why did this voice sound so familiar…? Yet I couldn’t place it. Someone whose name started with a “J” I think…

“Keep searching,” called out another muffled man’s voice. “She probably drifted somewhere under the ice.”

Who? Me? Ice? That would explain the cold. I’m vaguely curious at this point, but I still don’t really care. The stimulation from their conversation is actually kind of annoying right now. I’m tired. I would like to rest here in my cozy darkness. They’re so noisy in comparison.

Now there’s a scraping noise. Will it ever end? Go home, fellas. I’m trying to sleep.

“She’s here!”

“Stand back. I’m going to try to bust the ice.”

“I can’t tell if she’s breathing.”

“You have to stay calm, stand back.”

A large cracking noise sounded right in my eardrum. If I could recoil, I would. Why won’t they stop? Can’t they tell they’re being a nuisance, or do they just not care?

Suddenly, I feel like I’m flying. It’s even colder now, I think I’m in a different place. I don’t like it here. It’s hard and my blanket is gone. It’s registering to me that someone is pumping hard on my chest with what feels like hands. What was this called? CPR I think. Wait…isn’t that only for emergencies?

I’m all the way annoyed now. The men would be wounded if they heard the string of insults that I was currently slewing at them. First, they interrupted my rest. And now I find out that it’s over a mistake. I’m fine! Why can’t they see that? I’m fine! Leave me alone!

“She’s not responding, Coop…”

Coop? I think that’s short for something. Do I know the second man, too?

My peace has been severely disrupted at this point. This is ridiculous. I feel like I’m stirring, even though I know I’m physically not. For the first time, I feel the urge to communicate with them. I just want to tell them to go away. Why can’t I tell them that…

Wait…oh shit. Am I dying? Is this what dying feels like? This isn’t scary at all. People have it all wrong. This is the most content I have ever felt. And regardless of whether or not I knew these two noisy men, they were ruining that. I wish that they would just go away.

“Coop.”

No response from the man.

“COOP! Is she going to be okay?!”

“Jason! I don’t know, yet. I’m doing everything I can, but you’re not helping here. Get off the pond and go call for help.”

Jason.

In an instant, everything came back to me. Cooper is my brother’s best friend. Jason. That’s my older brother. My whole wonderful life came flashing before my eyes. All of the happiness, the sadness, the craziness, the stress, the surprises, the laughter, the beauty, I remembered it all.

Now, I was presented with an option. Do I continue in this life, or does it end here…?

…

“Jason! Come back! She’s opening her eyes!”