Isolation

It took Ryker way too long to bring back the pizza. My stomach grumbled the whole time. When Ryker got back with the pizza he set it along with paper plates on the table. I look at it curiously wondering how it will taste. Ryker grabs a plate and puts a piece of each on a plate for me.

I smile and take it looking at the triangle pieces. It almost looks like pie slices. I sit on the floor and just stare at it remembering the last time I had pie.

“Are you okay?” Ryker asks.

“I’m fine,” I say, trying to stop the tears from welling up.

“Definitely not,” Ezra says sitting next to me.

“I agree,” Ryker says as he sits on my other side.

“Sorry. It just reminds me of pie and I was remembering the last time I had pie,” I say trying to smile.

“Some people do call it pizza pie,” Ezra says, trying to make me chuckle.

“That’s cute,” I say with a half smile.

“Wanna tell us about it?” Ryker asks.

“After I eat,” I say as I stare at the pizza.

I pick up the supreme pizza slice and sniff it. I wasn’t sure if I was gonna like it because it had green peppers on it. I take a small bite and chew it slowly. It’s not too bad so I take a bigger bite and soon finish that slice. Next I pick up the chicken bacon ranch one and do the same. I don’t like it as much so set it down and move onto the all meat pizza slice. That one was my favorite and I finished it the fastest.

I stay sitting trying to convince myself that I had to finish the chicken slice but I couldn’t bring myself to. I try not to show my disappointment when Ryker and Ezra both finish their plates and go back for seconds. I start to cry silently. I’m too afraid that they’ll be mad at me for not being able to finish.

“Hey, what’s wrong Rae?” Ryker asks me.

“Nothing,” I say as I quickly wipe my tears away.

“You can tell us,” Ezra says.

“I just don’t want you guys to be mad at me for not being able to finish the slice because I don’t like it. I don’t want you guys to beat me until I eat it just so I can have another slice,” I say.

“Hey, we will bever beat you for not finishing your food,” Ryker says.

“Which flavor was your favorite?”Ezra asks.

“It’s fine, I don’t want anymore,” I say, trying not to panic.

“You can have another slice,” Ryker says, reaching for my plate.

“No, I’m sorry I’ll eat it,” I say, flinching away from his hand.

I try to grab the slice to eat it but Ryker moves it out of my reach. I start to panic and back up away from them. My heart starts racing as I go into complete panic mode. I bolt for the door trying to get away from them. Ryker grabs me around my waist and picks me up. I can hear him yelling something but can’t make out what it is.

Ryker carries me into the closet and puts me down on my blanket nest. He quickly gets up and slams the closet door so I have no escape. I quickly pull the blankets over me so I’m completely hidden. I breathe hard trying to calm myself down as my heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest.

After what feels like forever my heartbeat slows down and I can finally breathe without it feeling like an elephant is sitting on my chest. I hear Ryker and Ezra talking outside of the door

“I didn’t know she was gonna panic over getting another slice,” Ryker says.

“She never wrote about being beat for not finishing her food in her journal,” Ezra says.

“I feel bad because I wanted this to be a good experience for her,” Ryker says.

“I think it will still be a good experience for her, we just have to let her calm down,” Ezra says.

I grab the softest blanket from the pile and wrap it around me. I knock on the closet door. Ryker opens the door and looks at me trying to see if I’m good.

“I’m sorry I ruined dinner,” I say.

“You didn’t ruin it,” Ezra says.

“I didn't?” I ask confused.

“Not at all,” Ryker answers.

“Can I have some more?” I ask pulling the blanket closer around me.

“Of course there’s plenty left,” Ryker says.

“I’ll finish my slice first,” I whisper.

“Too late, Ezra got too hungry and ate it,” Ryker says with a chuckle.

“But, if I don’t finish it, how can I have more?” I ask.

“Because we don’t require clean plates for seconds,” Ezra answers.

“Oh,” I say as I sit back down where I had been.

Ryker hands me a plate with two slices of all meat on it. I take it and slowly start eating. I keep a watchful eye on them to make sure it’s still okay. Every time either one makes a move I flinch and move slightly away. I try to finish my slices but realize half way through the second slice I can’t finish it. I slowly creep towards the door trying to make sure they aren’t paying attention to what I’m doing.

One plate I can understand them forgiving but two plates I wasn’t gonna take the chance. I get close enough to the door and I bolt for it. Ezra notices what I’m doing and dives for me which catches Ryker’s attention. Ryker runs after me as Ezra hits the floor, his fingertips brushing my leg. I know I won’t get far so I go right and quickly enter Ezra’s room locking the door behind me.

I breathe hard wondering what they are gonna do to me when they get in. I hear the jingle of keys and mentally call myself a dumbass for not grabbing the keys. I go into the closet and close the door behind me. I very carefully climb up onto the shelf and hide behind the stacks of clothes as I hear the door open. I lay there quietly trying not to breathe as I hear both Ryker and Ezra search.

I hear Ezra saying something right outside the closet door and realize they know I’m in here. I hold my breath as they come in and turn on the light. I go to move quickly and catch my stitches on a loose piece of wood tearing them all. I try not to scream as the pain rips through me. Ryker quickly grabs me and bear hugs me. Ezra runs to his bathroom and grabs the med kit from there.

Ezra helps hold me down as Ryker presses gauze into my arm to stop the bleeding. I squirm and try to get loose but no amount of wiggling gets me out from under them. I start to cry as the pain sets in and my panic starts to fade. The weight of the two boys is somehow calming.

Ezra gets up allowing Ryker to pick me up and carry me to my room. They strap me down to the bed as I try to kick and bite them. Ryker pulls out the other med kit and quickly gives me a shot of sedation. Ryker waits a second for it to set in before starting to sew my arm back up.

“We have got to get her to a counselor,” Ryker says to Ezra.

“Are you sure the risk is worth it?” Ezra asks as he hands Ryker a bandage to wrap my arm up.

“If we don’t do it she won’t get any better. Besides there’s one here on campus who will see her,” Ryker says finishing up.

“You already checked into it?” Ezra asks.

Ryker nods as he goes to get my meds from the bathroom.

“We have to do something and this may be the last chance we have to keep her safe,” Ryker says.

“But what about other people seeing her?” Ezra asks as he unstraps my arms.

“The risk is worth it at this point,” Ryker repeats.

“But,” Ezra starts to say.

“No buts. We have no other choice,” Ryker says as he hands me my pills and water.

“I don’t want to,” I say glaring at them.

“The pills or the therapist?” Ezra asks.

“Both,” I say.

Ryker looks at me. I can tell by his disappointment that he isn’t happy with my answer. I don’t say anything else but take the pills. I’m glad Ryker didn’t give me a strong dose of sedation this time. I reach down to take off the ankle straps but Ryker stops me.

“From now on when we aren’t in here or we’re busy you have to be strapped to the bed until you show us you aren’t gonna run,” Ryker says.

“So what, now I’m a prisoner?” I ask.

“You’re a minor with a lot of issues that we have to work out before we can trust that you’re gonna be safe,” Ryker says.

“I’m fine,” I yell at Ryker.

“No you’re not. I totally get you aren’t used to having people care about you but you need to realize your actions lately have caused more harm than good. Ezra broke his nose when he went to catch you from going out the door and you bit me. We just want to keep you safe and if you have to see a therapist to get better that’s what we will do,” Ryker says as he straps my arms down to the bed again.

“I don’t need anyone,” I growl as I try to stop him.

Ryker ignores me as he checks on his brother. I watch as Ryker pops Ezra’s nose back into place before putting ice on it. I glare at Ryker as he comes back over to me. He unstraps me from the bed and lets me sit up.

“You have to realize our rules are different then your old rules and not everything is a reason to panic,” Ryker says as he sits next to me.

“I’m scared,” I whisper.

“I get that and I know these last two years have been hell with the trial. We just want to keep you safe. Not all of your father’s coworkers were put in jail, some were given probation. We need to keep you safe and that means keeping you isolated. You’re not an adult who can just go off on their own and do their own thing. You're a minor who is in our care,” Ryker says.

I sigh and curl up on my side, my back pointed towards Ryker. Ryker pulls the blanket over me.

“Ezra will be over by the door if you need him,” Ryker says before leaving.

I go to sleep and wake up in the morning still fighting my emotions. I sit up and notice I’m alone. I go into the bathroom and start the shower going. I hear the door open and Ryker comes inside. I can hear him asking me if I’m okay. I ignore him since they still haven’t fixed the door.

I walk past him into my closet. I grab a towel and clothes for the day before going back to the bathroom. The shower helps clear my mind some. I get out and dry off then put a dress and leggings on since it’s a bit warmer today. I step out of the bathroom and look at Ryker.

“Your first therapy session is in ten minutes,” Ryker says, not looking up from his book.

“How will I get there?” I ask as I braid my hair.

“Depends,” Ryker says.

“On?” I ask.

“Your attitude,” Ryker says.

“Then I’m not going,” I say as I sit on my bed and pull out my sketch book.

“Seriously?” Ryker says.

“Yeah. I don’t want the therapy but if it’s what makes you happy then I’ll do it,” I say as I sketch.

“I’ll just take her over there,” Ezra says as he comes in.

“Just because you're her bodyguard doesn’t mean you have good enough training,” Ryker says.

“What does that mean?” Ezra asks.

“It means you just turned eighteen. Before today you were still a minor who hadn't done a single bit of training to become a bodyguard. You were only chosen to come with me cause our brother died,” Ryker says.

“Sounds like you two are the ones who need therapy,” I say.

“Get up, we're going to your therapy,” Ryker says, ignoring my comment.

I put on a light jacket and follow Ryker outside. Ryker leads me across the campus to the therapist's office. I sit down in the waiting room and look at Ryker.

“You know you don’t have to be so rude to him,” I say.

“He’s still young enough to make stupid mistakes,” Ryker says.

I roll my eyes at him. The therapist comes out and tells me to come join her. I look at her and don’t move. He looks between Ryker and me.

“Go on Rae,” Ryker says.

“Not happening,” I say as I look towards the door.

“Would you prefer I came in with you?” Ryker asks.

“We can’t allow that,” the therapist says.

“If he can’t come with me I’m leaving,” I say.

“Just try it okay? I’ll be right out here and you can holler for me if you get too uncomfortable,” Ryker says.

I look between Ryker and the therapist before slowing getting up. I can’t bring myself to take a step forward. I take a deep breath and step forward. I promised myself I would try to get better so I have to do this. I step into the office and the therapist shuts the door.

“My name is Uriah, please sit,” the therapist says as he gestures towards the couch.

“No thanks,” I say as I scooch back away from him.

“Well it’s always an option if you decide you want to sit down,” Uriah says.

I stay close to the door, my back against the wall and watch as Uriah goes and sits down. I try to control my breathing but its hard.

“How are you doing today?” Uriah says.

“I’m fine,” I say as I try to control the shaking in my voice.

“Hmmm. Do you want to talk about why your arm is bandaged?” Uriah asks, trying to get me comfortable.

“I cut my arm,” I say.

“On accident or purpose?” Uriah asks.

“Accident,” I say, not wanting to get into it.

“How did you cut it?” Uriah asks.

“I fell and cut it on a nail that was sticking out of the floor,” I lie.

“Your friend said that you self harm,” Uriah says.

“I don’t,” I say, looking at the door.

“Are you lying to me?” Uriah asks.

I shake my head as I inch towards the door.

“Rae, you can’t leave yet. We still have fifty minutes,” Uriah says.

“But I don’t want to stay,” I whisper.

“The door stays locked unless it’s an emergency and there is no emergency to make you need to leave,” Uriah says.

I look at the door and then at Uriah.

“You aren’t the therapist are you?” I ask quietly as I reach into my jacket pocket.

“Not really but my twin brother had an emergency. You’re a smart little one aren't you?” he says standing up.

“What’s your name?” I ask, completely terrified.

“You’re too smart,” he says, coming closer to me.

“What’s your name?” I repeat.

“Onyx,” he snarls as I dive under the couch.

I pull out Ezra’s phone and try to remember the pin. I type in a pin praying I got it right. It unlocks and I start to type out a message to Ryker. I hit send right as Onyx grabs my leg and pulls me out from under the couch.

I wake up in a cold sweat and sit straight up. I look around confused and realize it was all a terrible nightmare. I curl my knees up to my chest refusing to move. The door opens as Ryker comes in.

“What’s wrong Rae?” he asks as he sits next to me.

“I had a nightmare,” I whisper as I scoot closer to him.

I curl up with my head on his lap.

“Wanna talk about it? Ryker asks.

I stay quiet as I try to relax. Despite how I act I am getting closer to Ryker. He’s like the brother I never had. Ryker tucks the blanket around me and brushes his fingers through my hair letting me lay there. I slowly drift back to sleep. I wake up the next morning and stretch. Ryker is no longer next to us but I imagine he’s going to show up soon.

I pinch myself to make sure this isn’t another dream. The bruise proves I am definitely awake. I get up and grab a towel from the closet. I then head to the bathroom. I get into the shower and try to figure out how to shave my legs. I holler for Ryker knowing he can hear me through the cameras. I can hear the door open and close.

“What do you need Rae,” Ryker asks.

“I need to shave my legs,” I say.

“I have to stand in the bathroom with you while you shave,” Ryker says.

“I’m okay with that,” I say.

Ryker leaves to grab one for me. I put on my swim shorts and sports bra and wait for him. He politely knocks before entering. I take the razor from him and sit in the bottom of the bathtub to shave. When I get done I hand the razor to Ryker and he leaves the room. I get undressed again and finish showering.

I wrap the towel around myself and go into the closet. I look through my clothes and find some leggings and a shirt to wear today. I put them on and then braid my hair. I step out of the closet and look for Ryker but am surprised to see he’s not in here.

I step towards the table and see some pancakes and bacon. I feel my stomach grumble and sit down to eat. Right as I finish eating Ryker comes in. I wave at him as I shove the last bite into my mouth.

“You seem to be doing better this morning,” Ryker says.

“I feel pretty good this morning,” I say.

“That’s good, are you ready for your therapy session?” Ryker asks.

“No, but I told myself I would try,” I say as I put a fake smile on.

“Well it’s good to see that you’re smiling,” Ryker says as Ezra comes in.

“Are we ready?” Ezra asks.

I give a thumbs up as I grab a light jacket. I head towards the door and as I pass Ezra I pickpocket his phone. I slide it in my pocket without either one noticing. I noticed his pin in the car on the way here. I follow Ryker across the campus with Ezra following. I’m surprised that there’s no one wandering around campus. We finally reach the building and go inside. I look around surprised by how similar this looks to my dream.

We go to a waiting room and sit down. Soon the therapist comes out to get me. I notice he’s a guy and I get nervous. Ryker walks over and they have a whispered conversation as I get up slowly. I make my way over to Ryker and hide behind him. The therapist smiles at me and opens his door.

“We can leave the door cracked if it makes you more comfortable,” the therapist says.

“Yes please,” I say, still hiding behind Ryker.

“Come in when you're ready. I’ll be right inside,” the therapist says.

Ryker steps to the side so I can look inside. I breathe out relaxing once I see it’s nothing like my dream. I slowly make my way inside and take a better look around. I see the bean bag chair and make my way towards it. I settle into it pulling one of the blankets that's by it on top of my legs.

“My name is Mr. Cinson, but if it makes it easier you can call me Uriah,” the therapist says.

“My name is Rae,” I whisper as I watch him.

“Are you okay if I sit closer?” Uriah says.

“That chair,” I say, pointing at a chair that's closer but still far enough away that I feel safe.

“That’s a perfect spot,” he says as he comes closer and sits in the chair I pointed at.

“I think so,” I say.

“What would you like to talk about?” Uriah asks.

“Do you have a twin brother?” I reply, my curiosity getting the best of me.

“Yes, I do. Why?” Uriah asks, looking confused.

“No reason,” I say.

“Hmm. Did you want to tell me about your arm?” Uriah asks, pointing to my bandage.

“I accidentally hurt myself,” I lie.

“What kind of accident?” Uriah asks.

“I tripped and caught my arm on a nail sticking out of the floor,” I reply.

“Your friend told me differently,” Uriah says.

“Well he lied,” I say.

“Really?” Uriah asks.

“I think I’m done for today,” I say.

“We still have forty five minutes left,” Uriah says.

“I said I’m done,” I repeat as I get up.

“Okay,” Uriah says as he gets up too.

I head towards the door passing a shelf on my way. I stop and pick up a picture. It’s a faded picture from a trip. I look at the men in it and off to the side I see my father. I quickly turn towards Uriah as he stops beside me.

“This is my father,” I say pointing to a man in the picture.

“Are you sure? It’s hard to make out any features,” Uriah says looking over my shoulder.

“That’s a trip we took the year I turned eleven. We went to a beach for two weeks during the summer. Father dragged me to a bar and made me stand and pose for men. I remember now. You and your brother Onyx were there. You were the photographer and you were taking pictures of everyone there,” I say moving towards the door.

“No I think you’re mistaken,” Uriah says coming towards trying to get the picture.

“Ryker,” I yell as I bolt for the door.

Ryker comes running in right as Uriah grabs me. Uriah presses my face into his chest making git where I can’t speak.

“What’s going on?” Ryker asks.

“She started to panic and I am trying to calm her down,” Uriah says, not letting go of me.

“Here let me,” Ryker says, stepping closer.

“I think we’re good here. Aren’t we Rae?” Uriah asks, digging his fingers into my ribs.

I nod in terror not seeing another option.

“Are you sure Rae?” Ryker asks.

I nod again as Uriah digs his fingers in again.

“I think we’re fine here,” Uriah says.

I can hear as Ryker walks back out the door. Uriah lets go of me and yanks the picture frame out of my hands. I bolt towards the door with the picture. I was able to get it out while they were talking. As I go out the door I run straight into Ryker who is standing right outside the door.

“What’s wrong Rae?” Ryker asks.

Before I can say anything Uriah comes out of the room behind me. He looks between me and Ryker.

“She changed her mind and wishes to end this session early,” Uriah says.

“Oh okay,” Ryker says, a bit confused.

“Can we go home now? I know it’s a bit of a drive and we still have to go shopping but I was hoping to take a nap,” I say, staring Ryker in the eyes.

“Yeah sounds good to me,” Ryker says, not correcting me.

We leave the building with Ezra trailing behind us. I look behind us and see Uriah watching us. I steer Ryker right instead of the left we should have taken. Ryker looks at me confused but does not question it. After we are out of sight of the building I let Ryker take us home. Once we’re inside my room I go straight for the closet.

“Rae, we need to talk about what happened,” Ryker says following me into the closet.

“He’s a bad guy,” I say, my voice muffled as I burrow under the blankets.

“What do you mean?” Ryker asks.

I pull out the picture and explain it. Ryker looks angry and hollers for Ezra.

“Did he hurt you?” Ryker asks.

“A little bit but I’m okay,” I say.

“Show me,” Ryker growls as Ezra comes in.

I peek at Ezra from beneath my blankets. Ezra looks between Ryker and me. I go further under my blankets as Ryker stands up.

“Take a break Ryker,” Ezra says.

“I’m fine,” Ryker says.

“No you’re not ,” Ezra says.

Ryker flips off Ezra but leaves the closet to take a breather.

“Wanna tell me what happened?” Ezra asks me.

“No,” I whisper.

“Are you sure?” Ezra asks as he sits next to me.

“Yeah, Ryker scared me,” I say leaning against Ezra.

Ezra puts his arm around me as we wait for Ryker to cool down. Ryker comes back into the closet about ten minutes later and looks at me. I watch Ryker as he comes closer and kneels in front of me.

“I’m sorry for getting angry. I wasn’t mad at you, I was mad at the therapist,” Ryker says.

“I forgive you,” I whisper.

“Do you think you can show me now?” Ryker asks.

I nod and lift up my shirt showing the bruises on my ribs. Ryker tries to control his anger so he doesn’t scare me.

“I’m gonna go talk to him,” Ryker says, standing up.

“You’re not in the right mental state to do that,” Ezra says, also standing up.

“I can come. That way Ryker won’t loose control,” I say.

“That’s a great idea,” Ezra says helping me stand up.

“No way,” Ryker says.

“Oh yes she is. It’s the only way I can make sure you won’t loose your shit and go to jail again,” Ezra says.

Ryker glares at Ezra but doesn’t protest. We head out the door in the formation that has become normal. Me in the middle, Ezra behind me and Ryker in front. We go across campus once again to the therapist’s office.