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If there is any unhappiness, don't think about it afterwards

Let go in order to be the best version of yourself

By Baru KuPublished 2 years ago 8 min read
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If there is any unhappiness, don't think about it afterwards
Photo by Austin Chan on Unsplash

In 15 days, it will be the day when I will retire according to my ID card time. I joined the workforce in 1982 and will retire in 2022, exactly 40 years. Only the two years of secondary school are not counted as years of service, otherwise, two more years can be added. Even so, the working time can be considered not too long and not too short.

Humanity

Looking back over the years, I can recall many things, such as the hardship of life, from the age of 5 and my brother returned to her mother's home with her mother, from then on lived without a father, but a strong mother gave my brother and I do not lack of fatherly life, plus our aunt and uncle as if they were their children, especially my aunt's father, the concern for me, absolutely do not know better than my biological father dozens of times, also have I had a better father's love. Therefore, I was poor, but I was very comfortable. My family did not become very bad because of my parents' divorce, except for the material conditions. Three events happened between the time I took the college entrance exam and the time I retired, but they were gently put aside.

The first incident happened in 1980 when I took the college entrance exam for the third time. 1978, I took the college entrance exam and ranked 5th in the whole commune, but still ranked 1st in physics, still 18 points lower than the score line, and did not have the chance to go on to higher education. 1979, I took the secondary school exam instead (at that time, the university and secondary school exams were separate papers), and again, due to some objective factors, I was 5 points lower than the score line. 1980, when I took the college entrance exam for the third time, my aunt, who was a teacher at the school, wanted me to pass the exam as soon as possible. In 1980, when I took the college entrance exam for the third time, my aunt, who was a teacher at the school, helped me secretly enroll in a junior college so that I could become a "consumer" and change my life by getting into the school as soon as possible, for which my aunt was severely criticized by the principal. At that time, in rural high schools, the only way to compete in the county's evaluation was to get into college, and junior college was the same as not getting in.

This year, I did not let my mother and aunt, and uncle down again, with a score of 258 points, exceeding the score line by 20 points, and it is known that this score ranks among the top few secondary school candidates in the county. After weighing my options, my first volunteer filled in the train driver program at Nanjing Railway Transportation School, which was a popular program, and after graduation, directly as a train driver, which at the time, was a very good and enviable career.

However, during the time of waiting for the acceptance letter, I became very unsettled, and delayed receipt of the acceptance letter, because, the railroad school is the earliest batch of admissions. During this period, my mother told me something, she went to a fortune teller to calculate my fate before I took the college entrance examination, saying that I would be admitted in my third year of taking the college entrance examination, but there were twists and turns. My mother said to me that it was fulfilled.

I didn't believe it, but the actual result was really "fulfilled". My aunt went to the County Bureau of Education to find out about the admissions situation and found that the notice for the Nanjing Railway Transportation School had been sent two days earlier, and a total of five people were admitted, three with lower scores than me and one with the same score as me. My aunt was surprised, but inadvertently found an anonymous letter reporting me for cheating on the college entrance exam. My aunt rushed back to the school and asked the principal, who said that someone had indeed come to investigate and that the school and the invigilator had made it clear that there was no such thing and should be unaffected.

Even so, I missed out on the school I most hoped to go to and was later accepted into the second choice, Jiangsu Metallurgical Industry School.

The incident hit me so hard that I secretly investigated and finally found out who had written the anonymous letter. It turned out to be a teacher who was competing with my aunt for the public teacher quota, and he took out his "hatred" for not being able to switch to a public teacher on me. At that moment, the heart of the unhappy, and even the idea of revenge, however, when I graduated from junior high school, and stayed in school as a cadre, and then changed jobs, slowly, the idea of revenge completely disappeared. Because, "out of blue" I have long been better than anonymously falsely accusing my teacher, and what is the need to stay unhappy, and even "revenge"? Therefore, when I see this teacher, I still affectionately call him a teacher.

The second thing that happened in 1991, was I was transferred from the school into the finance department. It was a very good thing and a very happy thing, but because of the behavior of the then principal, my transfer added a lot of unhappy elements, but also let me once the idea of revenge.

That year, I was given a new house in the school, although the area is only 37 square meters, for me at the time, my daughter was just over two years old, but also very happy, very happy, therefore, I spent all my savings to do a little decorating. However, living in just over six months, because of the job transfer, the principal asked that the house must be withdrawn to be stamped, otherwise, it would not be stamped. The personnel department issued a transfer order for one week, and if you do not report to the finance department within a week, the transfer will be canceled. And that year, it was raining constantly, a week, only half a day is cloudy, I asked my classmates and relatives to help, with half a day to move to a dangerous house.

In this dangerous house, only a month after the transfer, there are several nights because of the leakage of rain in the middle of the night to move the bed to sleep. And in winter, when it snowed, the first thing I did when I got home from work was to sweep the snow off the room, worrying that the house would be crushed. At that time, the heart resented the principal a little. However, after going to the new unit, everything was very smooth and happy, and soon, it was put down. Not only did I put it down, but when I heard that the principal was sick, I went to see him, making him both nervous and moved.

The third thing that happened in recent years, not long, just four or five years, I was adjusted out of the original job, the reason is, in the same position to do deputy more than ten years, and I have done a decade and a half should be adjusted (the reason is of course very legitimate, the reason is not so). So, to a new unit. Originally thought, will be familiar with, did not think, "teammate" is not good, not much time, the work of the contradiction appeared, there is no way to carry out the work.

Under normal circumstances, the work conflict between the first and second hand, should not become a personal grudge, should be automated to solve. However, I don't know if it is a female weakness or just born without a forgiving heart, I was contradicted and grudged. After the party hand retired to the second line, she ran to the organization department to ask not to promote me. Not to mention that the organization department should not listen to her, alone, which is also too waste of resources, because, she should understand, I do not want to be a hand. After more than a decade of deputy, has been very accustomed to, not to mention their hobby, simply do not need a hand to support the face. You see, offended people, but also a waste of resources, how uneconomical.

When I found out about this, I was fired up and wanted to go and chastise her. However, such a thing, a reprimand, will sell others as well. So, the anger was suppressed, vowing to give her some color when she was promoted. However, with her transfer away from the unit, she no longer appears in front of their eyes, she slowly, is also put down, and even forgets who she is. Recently, a friend came to the office to play, and asked me, if she was promoted, what do you think? I told my friend that I didn't think much of it, just congratulated her, sincerely congratulated her. Anyway, it is fate to be a colleague in a unit. Because, she and I have a grudge, I have no hatred for her, if her ignorance to torture themselves, the loss is still their own, might as well be put down.

Yes, putting down is perhaps the best protection for yourself, but also the best spur. If the contradictions and problems that arise in life, all bottled up in the heart, will be very tired. Especially resentment, all in the heart, but also think to retaliate, there is no end. The most effective way is to learn to forget and then let go. It happens to be that more people, who can afford to take, just can't let go. Put down, everything will return to normal, the mood will get better and better, and you can do the best version of yourself. Even if the events of recent years, because let goes, there is no unhappiness, how good. The so-called hatred is only for foreign invaders, for acts that harm the interests of the country and the people. As for individuals, it is better to let go of the past and let yourself become better. If you want to remember, you should remember the kindness and goodness of others more often.

Young Adult
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About the Creator

Baru Ku

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life."

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