How the Wee Coo Became Great

Scotland is famous for its darling, cute, hairy, wee cow (pronounced “coo”) that has grazed the rugged Scottish Highlands since the 6th century. It is miniature, compared to the average cow (with which folks are most familiar). People wonder whether the Highland coo originated in Scotland, or was imported with the Vikings from Scandinavia, or what? But actually, the darling, wee Highland coos began with a lad named Lachlan, who lived way back then, in the 6th century. Read on for his tale—but first, a little history...

Raising cattle wasn't always like the mass-produced way it is done today... People had a family cow, so they had access to milk and cream for butter and cheese—right in their own back yard! They were really more like pets, than produce. Families gave them names, rather than an ear-tag for identification (as they do today). But before the domesticated family cow, all cattle were wild.

Believe it or not, modern-day cattle are all descended from a single herd of wild ox. Lachlan's ancestors lived in the ancient days; when the only cattle were the wild Aurochs—the type of cattle in most cave paintings, and among the ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics.

Lachlan's ancient ancestors were fierce. But, he was among British and Northern European farmers who were milking cattle, around 4000 BC. His later ancestors spread the Sumerian practice of turning cow’s milk into butter and cheese.

Meanwhile, the humped Zebu cattle developed in southern Asia and parts of Africa. Taurine cattle (which became widely distributed around the world) developed from just 80 Aurachs, who were isolated in southeastern Turkey and northern Iraq! Finally, the Watusi cattle developed in eastern Africa.

Lachlan's grandfather lived in the days when the Watusi cattle (also known as the Hamitic Longhorn) were around Scotland. By the way, his grandfather was fierce, too; like his ancestors before him:

Several different cultures around the world actually began to revere cows as sacred, feeling the gods must have gifted them to humans; due to their multi-purpose usefulness for: transportation, load-bearers, plow-pullers, food (from their milk and meat), clothing (from their leather), tools (from their horns, hooves, and bones)—even their dung has been used for fuel! Aye, as domesticated animals go, cattle have been among the most useful to humans. In Lachlan's father's day, a person's wealth was even determined by how many cows they owned.

Lachlan's father was a warrior, too—but more contemplative, than fierce:

Lachlan's father was tired of having friends and relatives killed or injured from being gored by the dangerous horns on raging bulls... Also, it was difficult to care for such big cattle! The ferocious beasts would form a circle, with horns facing out, to protect their calves in the middle.

Then there were the logistics... The land on small properties of common-folk was very limited—they simply didn't own enough grass for those huge cows to graze on, if you wanted more than one or two. This meant herdsmen were often away from home, in order to move the cattle from one pasture to another, up in the open-grazing of the Highlands. Plus every winter, the herdsmen had to actually live with those needy cows in shelters elsewhere (because there wasn't room on their land to shelter them); leaving their wives and children to fend for themselves! Lachlan's father knew there had to be a better way. So, he started breeding cattle—his dream was to make them gentler and smaller.

Lachlan's father kept his plan secret; he never revealed his intentions of developing a smaller, gentler, more-manageable breed of cattle. Lachlan went with his father whenever he purchased the smallest and gentlest cow or bull he could find; so Lachlan knew full well that the sellers thought his Dad was nuts—that they had really taken advantage of him. But, nobody ever dared say so to his Dad's face—because his father was still fierce enough!

Their reaction to Lachlan, however, was another matter... You see, the fierceness in their family-line had run out, by the time we come to Lachlan; for he was as gentle as the cattle breed his father dreamed of developing—with the soul of a poet:

After his father died, Lachlan made his father's dream his own—with even more determination; for being a bright lad, he recognized the wisdom in reaching his father's goal. But, he added the goal of breeding for more milk production, to boot! Also, Lachlan wanted them to have double coats of hair, to help them withstand the winter months. With more determination came more success... Finally, Lachlan had bred enough wee coos—which he just knew, without a doubt, could improve the lives of herdsmen and their families, all throughout the Highlands of Scotland! But, he was afraid to let anybody know, for fear of becoming even more of a laughing-stock.

Now, most Highlanders love their beautiful country and are very patriotic; and rightly so, for you would be hard-pressed to find more rolling hills and such a charming land. Peaceful lochs, dramatic mountains, idyllic islands... what a delightful land in which the wee coos would become great! But, enough history—back to our tale to find out how...

Lachlan wanted to help people with his wee coos—especially the innocent children. But, how could Lachlan accomplish this without being laughed out of his village? Already, he was the topic of gossip.

Magnus, the Blacksmith, was the worst of all at ridiculing Lachlan; telling to all who would listen how Lachlan was as crazy as his father had been!

Then one day,, when Lachlan was wandering on a walk-about of sorts (so he could contemplate how to best share the news of his new, wee breed of Highland coos); he noticed signs that a Celtic person must have moved into the area! First, he saw some cairns (heaps of stones) in front of chambers in the hillside. Then, as he walked on, he saw a henge—a flattened round circle with a trench around it; the flat part was covered with a circle of stones.

Finally, from below the hill he was atop, he heard the grinding sound of someone making cupmarks on the rocks below—clearly, a Celtic practice.

Peering over the hillside drop-off, Lachlan saw the most beautiful woman he had ever seen! She was a female Celtic warrior, named Brianna. Unbeknownst to Lachlan, she had come from Ireland in hope of finding a gentle and good man, rather than a fierce warrior; like all the men she had ever known. (Little did either of them realize how each of them would help bring happiness into the other's life—for the better.)

Lachlan was so overwhelmed by her beauty, that he lost his footing... Just as Brianna sat down on the ground to rest and pray one more time for a good, gentle man; Lachlan came tumbling down the hillside and landed with his head smack dab onto her lap—as if on queue! Brianna had been seeking a sign; and here one had fallen right into her lap! Her heart skipped a beat—but first she had to determine what kind of man had literally just dropped into her life; so she asked, "What is your trade, Sir?" Being too embarrassed and flustered to lie; she was the very first person Lachlan revealed his secret to: "I have been breeding wee coos which I hope will improve the lives of everyone in the Highlands." Brianna smiled, satisfied.

There was nothing more to be done, but to immediately ask Lachlan to marry her. Assuming it had to be a dream come true, of course Lachlan said "Aye" on the spot.

It wasn't long before they both welcomed a new baby—a wee bull. By now, Brianna had heard the entire account... She knew what Lachlan had to do to change the villagers' opinion: "Take the wee bull into 'The Raging Bull Alehouse' and tell everybody WHY our wee coos—will improve the lives of all Highlanders. They will have to see it to believe it." Lachlan was alarmed, but wanting to please his dear wife, he listened to Brianna.

Nearing the establishment and spying Magnus' horse, he lamented (fearing the sign foretold a raging Magnus), "Why did they have to name the alehouse: 'The Raging Bull'? Why couldn't it be something nice, like 'The Pig & Whistle'?"

When he entered the noisy alehouse, all chatter and commotion quieted, the moment everyone spied the wee bull Lachlan was carrying. "What is THAT creature supposed to be?" boomed Magnus. Lachlan swallowed hard: "It's a wee bull. The reason my father and I have been buying up the smallest, most gentle cattle is because we've been breeding wee coos." Magnus guffawed, "Are you sure that wee bull can even do the job?" The entire alehouse burst into laughter. When they finally calmed down, Lachlan thought of Brianna, giving him the courage to continue: "I assure you, he can do the job with the wee coos. In fact, I have an entire fold of them back on my land. They're wee enough that my property can feed them all! No more having to go up into the hills for grazing!" With that, curiosity stilled the laughter.

"You're bloomin' crazy, Lachlan!" shouted Magnus. "I'll bet your wee coos don't even give enough milk to fill a thimble!" But Lachlan replied, "Actually, they've been bred to provide MORE milk than YOUR coos, Magnus." Before Magnus could snarl, Goodlad, the barkeep, cautioned all that there would be no fighting in his alehouse! Then, Fiona, the barmaid, spoke up, "Well, I think he's the most adorable bull I've ever seen!" Encouraged, Lachlan replied, letting her pet the wee bull: "And he's gentle, too. There will be no more loved ones getting gored, with my wee bulls and coos! As you can see, they're gentle enough to even bring them into your homes if you ever wanted to."

After that, Lachlan fielded one question after another from the crowd: "Why is he so hairy?" Lachlan replied, "I bred them to have two layers of hair, to withstand our cold winters. No more having to leave your families every winter to go live with the cattle!" Lachlan continued to answer more questions about the meat, the milk, their disposition... Finally, he remembered what Brianna had said, and he got up to leave, saying, "You won't believe it until you come see for yourselves. Brianna and I invite all of you to come observe our wee coos whenever you'd like." With that, he and the wee bull took their leave.

And come they did, to watch the wee coos...

Even Magnus could not contain his curiosity, and eventually came. After that, Magnus was so impressed, that he never made fun of Lachlan again.

Soon, every happy family had at least one wee coo of their own, as a family cow; and life was changed for the better for everyone—especially for the children, who thought of them as pets. They no longer had to be without their fathers every winter. They no longer had to lose loved ones from being gored. And they were getting more milk, butter, and cheese than they had ever enjoyed before! Besides normal buying and selling, 'Bridewealth' (the gift of cattle from a bride's family to a groom's family) soon spread the wee coos far and wide.

It wasn't long before the wee coos could be seen all over the Highland hills—just as they are down to this very day. And both the families who live there and the people who visit, are all the better for them. There is greatness in gentleness... Aye, the wee coos had become great!

Our tale ends with this blessing from Lachlan and Brianna, which has been passed down through the ages: "Wishing you always walls for the wind, a roof for the rain, tea beside the fire, and the love and laughter of those you hold dear."