Hot Tub Time Machine Chronicles Chapter 2

The following tale of temporal travel takes place in a universe inspired by the 2010 smash megahit film Hot Tub Time Machine. It is an original story, and does not feature any of the same characters as the film. This is... Life of the Party - Chapter 2.

EXT. ELECTRONICS STORE - LATER

Alex bolts around back, and up the stairs to the rear exit. He waits patiently outside the door. He checks his watch, and pulls his hat low -- careful not to be seen.

Suddenly the door flies open, and MAX CARMICHAEL heads out swiftly. He pulls at his tie, and unbuttons the top of his uniform.

Alex spins around quickly and follows. He meets strides with Max.

Alex quips, "Sell any stereos?"

Max responds, "Sure, the usual suspects who are just going to return them after their New Years party." Max breathes in the chill air, "Solar flares or not, it's fucking freezing out here."

Alex pipes, "Yeah that's a shame. Now come on, let's go!" as he picks up the pace.

Max shifts his feet into high gear, and keeps up, "Hey, why didn't you come into work today?"

Alex fires back, "New Year's Eve is a holiday! Or at least, it should be. Plus, there were some kids that wanted to do a Friday class. And I get paid to be a sensei at the dojo. So, yes I guess I did work today, but only for an hour. And mostly on my righteous bod."

Alex flexes his muscles.

Max raises an eyebrow, "So you just work out while you're supposed to be instructing students?"

Alex laughs, "Sure! You tell the pupils to do 20 laps around the mats, and then pop in a quick set."

"Do you run a martial arts studio, or a ninja army training camp?" inquires Max.

Alex says, "You must carefully train the body if you wish it to be an effective extension of your mind. But seriously, I called in sick! No one can see me. Let's go!"

Max's final words trail behind them, as they pedal it home, "Well, you almost made it in the building. That has to count for something."

INT. CONVENIENCE STORE - LATER

Alex and Max are shopping for snacks. Alex pushes the cart.

Max holds up a bag of Cheetos, and asks, "So, Cheetos, right?"

Alex replies without even thinking, "Yeah man, of course."

Max shakes his head, "No, well obviously yes. But one or two bags?"

Alex questions, "Are we going to be entertaining stoners this evening?"

Max thinks about it, "Maybe a couple."

Alex answers, "Then definitely two, and get dip!"

"Dip?" hesitates Max, "For Cheetos?"

Alex reassures him, "Max, you can't predict what these people will eat. Once I saw a guy rip a joint, and then pound three peanut butter sandwiches with KD cheese powder sprinkled on top."

Max corrects him, "What do you mean you saw that? I was there, and saw you eat that!"

Alex nods, and then shakes his head, "Not at all the point."

Max and Alex make their way to the cash register. Suddenly, Alex stops. His heart beats faster, "Max, that's her."

Max spins around, "Who?"

Alex grabs Max by the shoulders and turns him back. "Don't look!" Alex commands.

After they have settled for a moment, Alex whispers, "The checkout girl."

Alex continues, "She's the girl I've been telling you about."

Max puzzles, "You haven't been telling me about a girl."

"Well, I've been meaning to. Just look at her!" Alex says, as his eyes twinkle.

Max is again confused, "You said not to look."

"Okay, look in three, two, one... now." Alex speaks slowly.

Max turns his head. There we see a gorgeous blonde, in a tight black uniform, complete with apron. Her hair is tied into a pony tail with a pink scrunchie. She sucks on a perfectly spherical red lollipop. Max says, "Yeah, that's Kristie Halladay. She's in my Bio-Med class." Max sees Alex's bewildered look, "What? You're telling me that you've never talked to her?"

Alex shakes his head, "No, I've talked to her once."

FLASHBACK.

INT. HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAY - DAY

Alex sees KRISTIE HALLADAY approach as she walks along with her friends PRUDENCE, VIRTUE, and CHASTITY. All four girls walk by him. Alex manages to utter, "Hi."

Kristie turns, and looks. She doesn't seen anyone, just a large fern.

From the other side of the plant, we see Alex hiding. He clutches his chest and breathes heavily. He draws in quickly from his asthma inhaler.

Kristie shakes her head and walks away.

END OF FLASHBACK.

Max tries talking some sense into Alex, "Dude, this isn't school. You can actually talk to her. You're on the same plane."

Alex is bewildered, "I have no idea what you're talking about. When did we board a plane? Do you know where you are, right now? Do I need to call the paramedics?"

Max laughs, "Not an airplane, dumbass. A metaphorical plane of existence. A flat surface defined by three distinct points in three dimensional space. You and Kristie are currently on the same one. It's called anywhere in the real world."

Alex wonders, "I don't know. Are we really even anywhere? Is anyone ever really anywhere?"

Max slaps Alex across the face, "Just say something funny. Be yourself." Max turns Alex towards the register, and pushes him from behind a little to get him going.

Alex approaches Kristie, and whispers to himself, "Right, okay. Be smooth! Be cool! Be funny!"

Alex grabs a pack of gum and tosses it on the counter, "I need that because I brushed my teeth while eating a pop tart and drinking orange juice at the same time this morning."

Kristie shoots Alex a quizzical look, "Excuse me?"

"Uh, um, yeah. I'll take the gum. Dentine Ice. Just call me the Ice Man, I guess."

Kristie lets out a little laugh, "Okay, Ice Man. That all?"

"Yes," Alex nods, then looks at Max, who shakes his head, "I mean no! Uh, can I get some batteries? My TV remote died this morning."

Kristie smiles, then frowns, "That's so sad. When's the funeral?"

Alex laughs, "A joke. Hilarious. No, I mean they lost their charge. Or juice or whatever. It's some kind of chemical."

Kristie says, "Right, no I got it."

Alex keeps laughing, leading to an awkward pause, "No seriously, you are funny. Very funny."

Kristie looks at Alex then over to Max, "So you guys go to Bay High?"

Alex looks sullen, "Kristie, we have seven classes together."

Kristie laughs, "Alex, god I'm kidding. You've been sitting behind me since Grade 9. But this is the first time you've ever opened your mouth. Why? Is there something wrong with me?"

"No," Alex begins, "Nothing is wrong with you. You're perfect. It's just me. I get nervous around beautiful women."

Max flashes the okay sign with his fingers, then whispers, "Smooth."

Kristie looks serious, "So what changed today? Am I not beautiful anymore?"

The point blank aggressiveness makes Alex freeze. He tries to stutter a response but draws a blank. Max shrugs.

Finally Alex says, "So, what are you doing for New Years?"

Kristie slides a pack of fresh Duracell Batteries across the laser scanner, and into a plastic bag. She says, "I'm going to a party with some friends."

Alex looks a little disappointed.

Kristie continues, "That will be $9.93."

"Yes, right okay," Alex hands her a $10 bill, "Nice to finally meet you."

Kristie smiles, "Maybe you can stop by? We could 'meet' some more."

Kristie writes the address of The Party down on Alex's receipt, and hands it to him.

Alex tries for a verbal response but just makes a strange yelping noise, and nods. He smiles and walks away from the register towards Max, who has checked out with the Cheetos and Dip in another aisle. Alex holds up the receipts, and grins widely.