Heartbreak and a Small Bird

As we talked on the phone, the day outside was as bright as my outlook was dark. The voice on the other end of the line whispered, “it’s over” and my voice broke as I struggled for air.

Things hadn't exactly been great between us of late, but I honestly hadn't seen this coming. Call it wishful thinking, or burying my head in the sand, but I always thought we'd pull through. I put my head in my hands and sobbed silently, the staccato rise and fall of my shoulders the only outward sign of the pain I felt inside.

Ping!

My breaking heart seemed to manifest in a crack on my windowpane, the glass shaking as I slammed down my phone. There didn’t seem to be anything else to say anyway, he'd made that clear.

I rushed to my window grateful for the distraction, and there I found a little bird, a robin, crumpled on my windowsill. My heart broke anew as I took in the helpless visage before me.

As tears rolled down my cheeks, thoughts for myself were replaced with thoughts for this poor fragile little creature, battered and bruised but still fighting for life.

I channelled all of my pain into taking care of the little bird. I cooed and sung quietly to it, as my mum had sung lullabies to soothe me as a child. I made a nest-box to comfort my little robin and protect him from the harshness of life in the outside world. Together we hid away from the pain and danger that had damaged us both.

I treated him tenderly and with utmost care. What little love left inside my body I poured into my new little friend. My thoughts for my own broken heart seemed to fade as I sunk all of my energy into repairing his.

The days stretched into weeks as we comforted one another and tried to regain the strength we both had lost that day.

I awoke one morning surprised to find him flying around my bedroom haphazardly on a damaged wing, determined to repair his broken little body and spirit. He alighted on my chest and looked closely at me as if to say, “Come on, no more wallowing,” before taking flight once more. My breath caught in my chest and I felt a sudden swell of love for the little robin that finally cast out the last of my demon sadness.

From that day I decided to take a leaf out of this little bird's book. No more grieving for that which I had lost. No more pining for someone who did not deserve my love or sorrow. Watching my little robin fly I resolved to take inspiration from him and seek to repair myself.

Finally, after several weeks of tending to one another, our outlooks seemed replenished, with love overflowing from our hearts. Like my little friend, I felt full of strength and vitality and a joy for life once more.

I opened the window and after a glance and a final bob of its head, as if to say “thank you” I fancy, he took his leave of me and alighted onto a branch of the lone pear tree in my garden.

I smiled and wondered at the size of his mighty spirit in contrast to his tiny body. A quick peck into a sweet juicy pear and with a subtle glint in his eye, he took off and soared once more into the bright blue sky. The rustle of the branches causing some of the beautiful blossoms to fall gently to the ground, along with the last of my heartache.

My heart swelled with love, strengthened anew, and once more I was ready to meet the world, like my little robin.