Hashtag Holiday Havoc

Sandy thought little of an unmarked parcel from an unknown sender. Everyone loved the Shefferley family. Gifts weren't unusual. When she found the elf inside, cogs started turning in her shrewd brain. There's content here! She resealed the box for Savannah and Wyatt to open in front of the camera when they got in from school. So what if it was staged? Everything was.

The shoot went as expected. Savannah whined, tossing her pretty ribbons and rolling her eyes. Wyatt got bored and whacked baubles off the tree with a lightsaber. Mateo tipped his milk over the cat. Karl sloped through in the background, angling his scowl away from the camera. Sandy spliced together useable footage with a shot of her chatting animatedly in a Santa hat.

She'd been right; the unboxing was a hit! Her followers were keen to suggest names, and just as keen to vote for a favourite.

On the first of December, when the whack-a-mole that was bedtime was finally done, Sandy created a snowy scene on the kitchen counter, arranging "Jingles" at a jaunty angle with the flour bag and his own footprints.

The first week progressed as it might in any elf-friendly home. Jingles drew moustaches on the family photographs, tied up some of the ornaments with ribbon, and unrolled toilet paper all over the tree.

December marched on. Sandy was exhausted. Frazzled, actually, with the pressure of creating a picture-perfect Christmas. Not just for her children, but for her legion of followers. Why did I start this?

One night, she fell asleep without "doing the elf". She awoke next morning with a gasp, and flew downstairs, only to find that Karl must have done it. Jingles was surrounded by four broken gingerbread men and crumbs, looking decidedly guilty.

That night, Sandy went to bed early, delighted to discover in the morning that once again, Karl had got into the spirit of things. Jingles had rearranged the magnetic letters on the fridge.

you better watch out

On the third night, Jingles was hanged by his neck from the tree, with "Karl" pinned to his tunic.

"Not funny, Karl," Sandy muttered, binning the nametag and fastening the tinsel around Jingles' ankles instead.

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To be continued...