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Going for the win

The follow-up to "And the winner is....?"

By Rachel DeemingPublished about a year ago 1 min read
Going for the win
Photo by Zachary Kadolph on Unsplash

Trigger - descriptions of domestic abuse

***

She was desperate. Sitting in her borrowed car, fingering the "joke" pistol on her lap, her knees jiggled with nervous anticipation at what she was planning. Balaclava at the ready, dressed in black, for the part. If only she felt like she could do this...

She tried to breathe deeply but her chest was constricted by tension, yes, but more so, by the reminders of brutal injury. She had made the mistake of looking at her body this morning and been horrified at the colour of her blue skin and its misshapen landscape. She had winced as she had pressed the contours of violence showing on her skin.

She had tried to escape before but she had always been persuaded to come home. It had seemed like the easiest option then, with no money and no options.

But something had broken in her that night, as she lay on the floor and it wasn't only her ribs.

It was time.

Deep breath, balaclava on, door open, quick exit.

The old lady in the music shop was terrified by the black-clad gun-wielding robber as she handed over the cash.

Fleeing the scene, her balaclava hid her shame.

***

Another micro-fiction challenge and a sequel to "And the winner is...?", a previous micro-fiction Top Story. Inspired by L.C. Schäfer's request for a heist sequel to a different story Life Through Glass which is still in the making...

Short StoryPsychologicalMicrofiction

About the Creator

Rachel Deeming

Storyteller. Poet. Reviewer. Traveller.

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Comments (5)

  • Sian N. Clutton9 months ago

    What happens next? Hopefully she keeps the balaclava on and visits her abuser!

  • Donna Fox (HKB)11 months ago

    I really liked this Rachel, it was tension filled and not at all what I was expecting! The twist of her robbing a music shop was so great, I thought for sure she was about to avenge herself for whatever transgressions her partner had done to her! Great work!

  • Shelley Carrollabout a year ago

    You said (and I felt) a lot in few words - you painted a very vivid and palpable image! Well done!

  • Andrew C McDonaldabout a year ago

    Nicely written. The anxiety and fear comes through palpably, which is hard to do on micro fiction. Good job.

  • Jennifer Cooleyabout a year ago

    Hi, I think you and I could collaborate on something together for fun and get a pretty good result out of it! Reading this struck me right away to a song I wrote back when I was only 18 dealing with escaping trauma and the same cycles that drive us mad when we can never figure out which way to go to change what is happening in our lives! So I will share that here with you, there are additional segments around this topic, which spans out to different time frames or periods of life and experience for the character in the years tried, tested and true before finally reaching escape and freedom. And I think that over time putting all of that energy and thought together we may actually produce something pretty good! So I will just leave the words to that song I wrote here for your reading pleasure and let you discover it and reply after you`ve had a chance to think on it? Beginning, Middle`s & Ends, if we worked on a collab from that concept I think we might find ourselves pleasantly surprised! ~ The Angels Cry ~ 1st verse: The Angels cry, as the days go by Watching the souls and the spirits die, People don’t know the inner mind cries They’re watching our LOVE As the days go by. Chorus: Musn’t give up hope Continue to try Reaching out to you And showing you why, Just feel the pain and let yourself Cry But Don’t Let your love die Don’t let your love die If you need a reason I’ve a reason to give…. Verse 2: They say the recessions over, But the depressions now begun There’s fighting everywhere And the youth are dying Young Don’t let your love die Don’t let your love die Chorus: Musn’t give up hope, Continue to try In reaching out to you And showing you why Just feel the pain And let yourself cry, But don’t let your love die If you need a reason I’ve a reason to give Verse 3: Lights in the corner of the room shine bright, Her head hangs low, from the damage of the blows, Looks at the knife about to take her life, Lost enough blood, no strength left to fight Nowhere to go, can’t stay another night Wishing there’s a way to make the wrongs all right! Chorus: Mustn’t give up hope, Continue to try In reaching out to you, I’ve been showing you why Just feel the Pain Feel the Pain Feel the pain And let yourself Cry…. But Don’t let your love die Don’t let your love die If you need a reason I’ve a reason to give, My Love Died My Love Died Verse 4: The Angels cry, as the days go by Watching the souls and the spirits die People don’t know the Inner mind cries They’re watching our love And saying Good-bye… As they days go by, Don’t let your Love Die Don’t let your Love Die! written by, me of course! Jennifer Cooley! If you`d like to read the other one about a future time of the story, relatable in part due do my true story just ask and I would happily share that part as well! You can email me anytime at: [email protected] :D

Rachel DeemingWritten by Rachel Deeming

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