From The Desk of the BBC: The Tea Bandit Strikes Again

These streets never knew what hit them…they should have paid more attention in history class.

It’s a truth we all share down here amongst the dregs–what is taketh can be taketh again just as easy.

Them up there in their ivory towers never learned that lesson. Easy enough to sit there every afternoon and sip and sip and sip and laugh and laugh and laugh.

All while we die of thirst.

I hit Twinings first. Easy prey.

Yorkshire was harder. They were smart enough to pay attention.

Didn’t save ‘em, did it?

V loaded up dynamite and ran it into parliament. I always loved that book. Maybe if we had more V’s among us, we wouldn’t be in this mess.

I donned his mask and blew up a container ship of all the tea I stole in the middle of Felixstowe harbour.

The Americans would be proud.

“Why steal the tea?” I’m sure they ask.

Some days, it’s to drive the price up. My plantation, the last remaining in Britain, is now their only supplier. The barons don’t know their Pounds go directly to feed those in the London underbelly.

And I always know where the tea is.

Some days, it’s to punish those who turn their back on the world while they grow fat.

But most days, it’s the thrill of the heist. I am a man, after all.

Until I don the mask and slip away into the mind of someone else.

For when I do…

…I am…T

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A/N:

Little Entry for another great community challenge. For those stuck in a rut, this took about 7 minutes. I love a good pun piece.

WC: 250

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