Final Message

Last month, I traveled north from Girona, Spain, to Cherbourg, France, by rail to board the newest cruise ship headed to America. Leaving my mountainous hometown was emotionally challenging since I left all I knew behind. Girona is a beautiful ancient city in northern Spain, but life there was always hard for me, and I wanted a new beginning.

I am the child of poor farmers who struggled to make a living on the land. Sadly, my parents died when I was less than eight years old. My extended family was too poor to care for me, and I was placed in an orphanage run by the Catholic church. Growing up in the orphanage was full of trauma as I suffered abuse at the hands of older children and never found protection from the nuns or priests. I learned to defend and take care of myself since no one else would.

As I grew older, I worked as much as I could and saved my money so that I could escape. I read as many newspapers and books as I could get my hands on, and the stories that fascinated me were about America. The stories of people leaving Europe and making a better life in America inspired me. I worked and saved for ten years to pay for the train and ship tickets to America, and I was excited to leave Spain and travel through France for my trip abroad the newest cruise ship in the world. When I left Spain, I prayed to God to bless my trip and asked that the souls of my parents would guide me in the new world.

When I arrived in Cherbourg, the port was full of excitement as people waited for the arrival of the Titanic. The word was that the ship was the most magnificent ever built, full of luxuries. I was excited about the ship’s arrival, even if I only possessed a third-class ticket. To me, the ticket meant a new start full of new opportunities. I couldn’t wait to experience the voyage across the Atlantic and marvel at the site of the Statue of Liberty as the ship entered New York harbor. I had read so many stories in newspapers about peoples’ experiences seeing the statue and what it represented.

When the Titanic arrived, I couldn’t believe my eyes. She was the largest ship I had ever seen. Titanic was a marvel of human engineering. Some said she was unsinkable, and from my initial impression, I couldn’t argue. When my time came, I climbed abroad and made my way to my room. As a third-class ticket holder, I shared a room with other passengers. I didn’t want to take a top bunk, but I was not going to argue when I realized that was all that was left. A week sleeping on a top bunk was worth the voyage to America.

When the Titanic departed Cherbourg, it made a stop in Ireland to pick up more passengers. My area in the third-class area became more crowded as more people headed to America boarded. I enjoyed the atmosphere as people were jubilant as the Titanic left Ireland and headed out into the open ocean. As a Spaniard, I enjoyed the festive mood of my fellow passengers. I enjoyed the Irish singing and dancing, even if it was slightly different than the Spanish music I was accustomed to in Girona. I remember meeting and dancing with a lovely woman from Dublin. The food was decent but a little bland for my taste, but booze always made food taste better.

During the day, I walked outside along the top decks with my notebook to enjoy the fresh sea air and record what I saw and experienced. The water appeared dark gray and green. I knew that the northern Atlantic Ocean was much colder than the warm Mediterranean Sea I enjoyed during a previous visit to Barcelona. I thought the Atlantic was majestic as the sun shined from above despite its chilly appearance. Out there in the middle of the ocean, anything seemed possible.

On the fourth day of the voyage, everything seemed normal. The sky was clear, except the temperature seemed colder. I did my daily walks on the top deck during the day for my exercise and returned to the lower decks for dinner, drinks, and more festivities. All the booze and dancing made me sleepy, and I went back to my bunk to get some sleep. I remember sleeping for a few hours before I awoke when I heard a shrieking sound like a giant fingernail was scratching the ship on a chalkboard.

I quickly grabbed my coat and headed to the top deck to see the cause of the noise. When I initially arrived, everyone seemed normal. I looked back in the direction the ship traveled from and noticed an iceberg in the distance. I asked one of the ship’s crew if everything was fine, and he nodded yes, but something in his eyes told me to worry.

It soon became apparent that something was terribly wrong. I could hear and see the crew prepare the small boats for evacuations. The order was announced that women and children were to board the boats. Quickly realizing that men like myself would board last if any spaces were left, I ran back below to alert the people in my bunk area. I told everyone to grab their warm coats and head up to where the boats were being loaded. The scene quickly became chaotic as everyone tried to make their way up.

Everyone could feel the floors shift as the Titanic took on water. The sight and sound of the ocean water filling the Titanic caused more panic as people fought to make their way to the upper decks. I helped guide as many people as possible up so that the women and children could board the small boats. The panic and chaos spread as men fought with the crew to get on the boats, which caused several boats to fall into the water empty. Other boats seemed to be launched half full. I realized that the best I could do was continue helping others get to safety despite the dangers. I sensed God telling me that was my purpose as I rushed back down to help guide more people to the boats. As a child, I was abused and neglected, and I vowed as an adult I would never allow another person to endure that pain if I had the power to help.

I went down as many times as I could; however, more areas were too flooded each time I went. As I searched for people, I came across a young Irish girl. She was no older than six years old and appeared to have been separated from her family. My English was not good, but I did my best to calm her and gain her trust. I knew I needed to get up to the boats where hopefully, she could reunite with her family. I will never forget the look in her eyes as she accepted my help. I grabbed her into my arms and ran as fast as possible to the upper decks towards the boats. I hoped someone would recognize the young girl; however, no one did. When I arrived at one of the boats being loaded, I motioned to the crew and the ladies abroad for someone to care for the girl. One of the ladies agreed to take the girl with her. As I handed the girl over, I took off my coat and gave it to her to stay warm. The last thing I remember seeing were the tears in her eyes, and I could sense her eyes were saying thank you and goodbye. I always wanted to have a daughter of my own, and I realized that was the time God would allow me to have a father’s emotions of saving his daughter.

I continued my efforts of helping people; however, as time went on, it became harder and harder to get people off Titanic. I knew it would only be a matter of time before the ship slipped below the waves. If I were to survive, I knew the best thing for me was finding another coat for warmth, a life jacket, and a bottle of whiskey to help numb the pain after entering the freezing water.

I found a bottle of whiskey that was half empty, and I began to drink from it to help numb my senses. At the same time, I could hear the scream of people as the Titanic began to split in two and people began to fall into the ocean. I kept drinking and feeling the alcohol take effect. At the same time, I began praying for all the souls suffering in the water and prayed for the little girl I had rescued.

The water rushed across the deck as the Titanic began to slip below the water. My feet and legs were cold and wet as I walked towards the ledge to jump into the water and swim away before being sucked below. At the same time, I finished the whiskey as I finished writing my final note. I sealed the message inside the bottle and placed it in my coat pocket. I swam away from the ship and tried to stay afloat in the water. The water was ice cold, and I did my best to stay awake. Despite my best efforts, I felt myself falling asleep. As I fell asleep in the icy water, I thought about my life and what could have been.

If you are translating and reading my final message, know that I did not survive the night. Please tell others that I escaped hardship in Spain but found my purpose aboard the Titanic. Life was hard for me, but I spent my final moments helping others survive and live the life I wish I could have. I never saw the Statue of Liberty, but I earned God’s grace.

M.L. Vidal