Chaos

You don't like me anymore, right?

For 4 days, you haven't talked to me. Since last Saturday, you haven't wanted to contact me, even though you were online all the time, several times per day, though we met on Sunday.

Do you know that I felt scared when I saw you that day on 29 June? I didn't want to see you. I've not prepared, I don't know how to face you. I like you so much, I was waiting for you all the time. But you never showed up, I hated, I cried, I got depressed, I wanna die in your arms... But I still like you, that much.

Why did you change your avatar to a wounded heart? What happened to you? Is it because of me who didn't contact you? Or it's because of other things which are non of my business?

Why do you send your status like these at 8:39 3 July?

yo sere pecador pero a mi alrededor no veo ningun santo.

solo observa y calla que la vida te va demostrando poco a poco quien es quien.

I was about to ask you, but I've already promised that I'll never contact you initially. I can't break my promise to my love. I can feel my heart hurt, my breath faster, my stomach ache, and my throat choke when I saw you unhappy, sad, or injured. I really worried about you. Hopefully, you'll get through on your own soon. I can't be with you all the time. I may have my baby with my love. But I wish you could be happy, be strong, and be good. Sorry, I can't contact you initially. I have to respect the trust in my intimate relationship.

However, if none of these are related to me, it could be a joke. I don't know what happened during these 6 days you didn't contact me.

What I know is I feel hurt indeed in my stomach, my heart. I can't sleep well, I have to take medicine to go to sleep, to avoid too many sad thoughts. I'm sick indeed. I was thinking of all the words you said to me. I'm not able to tell which are true and which are .

Yo te necesito

Te Deceo.

Y te qudas conmigo entonces

I am with all my true heart into this relationship. But when I heard that he´s a Casanova, I felt really laughing or crying. I didn't know this word before. After checking it seriously, it says Casanovas do love each one deeply. The problem is that they love too many people. Writing these, I found myself a Casanova too, though without sex.

I don't know why he posted another 3 as below.

no necesitas muchas personas para ser feliz. solo las que te aprecian por lo que eres. Y no por lo que tienes y les puedas ofrecer

solo observa y calla que la vida te va demostrando poco a poco quien es quien.

Podré tener mala memoria, pero jamás olvidaré el día que empece a hablar contigo sin saber que te iba a querer tanto.

He said he needs me. But I don't know what happened during the past 6 days. It's like I'm a victim who is initially looking for the abuse. I can bear that he didn't come twice after making the appointment. I even feel comfortable when he orders me to call or stop or to listen, falling into the power that he shows.

Yes, I don't believe him anymore. His behaviors, what he said, and what I heard, break his attractive image in my mind.

This is dramatic, unbelievable, incredible. I felt myself stupid enough to fall in love with a Casanova... Stupid me!

If you do need someone to help you. Look for others then. I've told you I'm taking medicine for depression, but you didn't care much about me. You only want me to come over for help. Do you really love me? I guess not.