Chance in a million

I can see them through this crack. It isn’t much but it’s just enough to peek through. I must keep quiet or they’ll find me, but I know it won’t be long.

Why would they think to look here? Nothing about this pot I’m hiding is suspicious, sure it’s plausibly big enough to fit me but come on, why would they look here?

Ok fine, I’ll admit a lone pot in the middle of the woods is a little suspicious but I made it weathered enough, right? My disguise casting I’d say is pretty decent if I do say so myself, but without proper time to prepare… well I just have to take what I can get.

Their long jackets don’t scare me, I’ve never been afraid of pirates but it’s true if they find me I’m done for. I can’t believe they thought to search here, there’s an entire beach front I’d thought they’d go for first.

Damn my prejudices! They’re not as dumb as they look, but they’ll have to see through my disguise first before I truly believe it. Boy, do they smell bad though, no such thing as a bath on a pirate ship I suppose - and now it’s my problem!

Being pirates, they likely aim to keep their treasure but what’s the harm of easing their burden a bit, hey? Don’t they appreciate the service I’m providing? Evidently not. No one values good craftsmen ship anymore, besides I only took a key, a tiny little key, surely they won’t miss that.

Ok, maybe I took a gem or two for my trouble but hey they were terribly untidy with it, let me tell you! Their entire stash was piled together ON THE FLOOR below deck. It was spilling all over the place. The captain at least had the good sense to store the key separately for easy looting..(cough).. attaining.

Oh bugger, here one comes.

I must remain still, perfectly still, movement shudders the illusion. Come on.. come on.. concentrate. Phew, he’s ignoring me so far, but keep still.

Is that a suspicious squint I see? Damn it! That’s never good is it - I wonder if he’s ever considered the existence of ancient cultures, for example ones that might leave behind old pottery.. in the woods.. against a tree…

Ugh, likely not. But maybe, just maybe, he’s done a bit of light anthropological reading when ashore. Yeah like at a tavern.. hmm no, or then a brothel.. no not that… maybe the captains quarters…

Right here we go, he’s stepping closer now. I think I’m done in - gonna have to leg it. What’s this? He’s turning away? Phew..

Oh wait!

I remember this fella, scrawny man with bad teeth - he was on guard snoozing at the ladder when I snuck onboard. He’s much more attentive now - damn he’s just calling his mate over.

Reeeeemmmmaaaaiiiinnnn still…

I see, yes the sword would be a predicable first choice - I can’t blame them there. Though is it totally necessary to brandish them so needlessly like that? They’ll poke an eye out.. maybe that’s what they want…

Ouch! That tickles, no stop you bastards! Haha, stop poking me.. ah I mean.. leave the ‘definitely not talking’ pot alone!

Right. Well that didn’t work.

*Poof*

“Hiya fellas, he he, care to talk this out?”

They do not care to talk this out, and now I’m running through the woods.

Fantastic! Just what I wanted, NOT, and all over this blasted key, what’s it open anyway? It’s tiny, no bigger than a thimble and yet these buggers won’t give up chase.

I will admit it does look valuable. It’s ornate yet simple design would mean it’s no mere trinket, and certainly difficult to replicate. And it has such a lovely weight to it.

Wowzer, these two are fast. They’ll be on top of me soon. I gotta think fast..

Oo oh oh! Crazy idea that just might work!

Right ok, look at the key and focus. Focus… focus… casting on the fly is never a good idea. Shhh, Me! FOCUS!!

Ouchy! Of course I find the only protruding tree root! Damn it, gotta keep going.

Ok, here we go but I need to find the best spot for the switch up. Searching.. searching.. There! Between those two embracing trees, that’ll work nicely.

“Come on, ya bastards!”

Are these guys paid! I mean seriously - what is their motivation here, I’d never lose them on foot in a thousand years.

Oh whatever, this trick better work or I’m giving up - I’m not built for long distance.

Ugh!!

Look, I can’t even measure the improbability of getting this exactly right, I mean it’s gotta be.. wait.. ok ok, shut up, here we go…

*Poof*

Gasp!

And there it is, nestled neatly in a pile of leaves - a love letter to my craft!

An example of my magnificence!

I’m simply a genius!

But wait, the true test awaits - my pirate pals approacheth.

They won’t see me above in these trees once that catch the glint of my masterpiece.

Come on, come on.

Number one takes it and number two observes. No suspicion between them. Ok they’re searching for me now, they don’t see me, aaaannnnndddd… they give up chase.

Phew!

Wow! A perfect replication cast in seconds flat - what are the chances…