Bad AI

“It had a 9 mm strapped to it,” Nancy, the secretary to the bank branch manager, said, “Then it said it had a bomb, if anyone ran it would blow up and kill us all. I was very scared. I had dreaded this day for a long time and now it was finally here, remote controlled robot robbery. It was after one thing.”

She had no clothes and was wearing a paper smock give to her by the investigators.

“The Money,” Tim, the FBI agent investigating the Bank Robbery, said.

“Oh No,” Nancy said, “It did not want money. It broke into one safety deposit box.”

“You had best start from the beginning,” Tim said.

It rolled into the bank lobby just at closing. Jan, our guard at the front door, said, “Halt!”

It zapped her and she hit the deck an went out like a light. That’s when it said it had a bomb. Then it rolled by me, and hit Mr. Jeffery’s door. The door burst open and the hideous thing shot Mr. Jeffrey with a taser. It said to take it to the deposit boxes, or it would give Mr. Jeffrey a fatal shock. When the gate was opened, it rolled over to one box. It put a probe to the box. Then there was a blinding light and the front of the box fell to the floor with a metallic clank. It reached in the box and pulled out a data drive. Then it turned and roll by the open cash vault. It sprayed something on the money, and all the cash slowly melted away to dust. Then it said strip off all our clothes.

Marcy said, “Oh no, I aint stripping off my clothes.”

It zapped her, and she collapsed into a pile of skin and bones. Everyone else took off their clothes and put them in a big pile. It sprayed them and they all melted away. Everyone hid behind something and would not come out. It made a great flash and all electrical things stopped working. It dropped a box with a flashing red light on it.

It said, “This is a chlorine bomb! If anyone moves, it will be set off.”

No one moved for 15 minutes or so. When the red light stopped, Vicky got out of her hiding spot and walked nude to her car and called her car’s emergency assistance.

It took like an hour to get everyone calmed down and out of hiding.

Tim said the video from across the street shows it rolling into an alley and it disappears. We can’t find a trace of it anywhere. Who does the safety deposit box belong to?”

Nancy said, “A computer company called Universal Automated. They do a lot of AI stuff. You know the ones on TV that say make it a better day, choose to go UA.”

Tim said, “Did you notice anything unusual about the drone?”

“Only that it had a 9mm strapped to it. I was so flustered that we all were forced to strip, I can’t think straight!” Nancy said, “Can I go home now and put some damn clothes on?”

“I don’t know I’ll have to check with my boss,” Tim said, “There might be more questions.”

Nancy said, “Oh that’s just fantastic.”

Tim approached Hank, the one in charge. He was talking on the phone.

He put the phone in his suit pocket and said, “What?”

“They want to go and put on some clothes,” Tim said.

“No one leaves until I say so. You take Rita, get to UA and find out what the hell was in that freakin’ box.”