August Snow

I glanced up from my phone.

I glanced around at the empty street.

I glanced up at all the skyscrapers around.

Why had she wanted me to meet her here, in the dead of summer in the sweltering heat? Why had she refused to elaborate on her singular text, at midnight? Why was this so sudden?

Her faint outline came into view, long strides ever so confident, chin held up high, smile on her face. I waved. She looked down. She kept walking. How odd.

She stood in front of me, 30 feet away, face in the shadow of the buildings. The park was empty and dark. A light mist of sweat coated my body as I stood underneath the Shanghai sun, my white shirt, translucent.

She stepped into the light. A single tear ran down her cheek. The tear dropped onto the cement, leaving a wet mark.

The mark froze.

What?

The distance between us was growing ever larger, she kept stepping backwards, away from me.

I stepped forward to close it, only for her to take two steps back. I was rooted.

I opened my mouth. She shook her head.

The wind began to blow. A few strands of hair floated gently across her face. It blew stronger.

In a low soft voice she said: I'm sorry. I don't like you anymore. We need to stop meeting. Don't ever contact me again. Don't try to find me. I don't want to see you again. I want nothing to do with you anymore. You don't need to understand. There's no point. It won't make me change my mind. Just accept this. You are free. Goodbye.

She snuck a last playful wink in.

The shadows shifted to cover me.

My body felt frozen. My eyes couldn't leave her face.

She wiped the tears off her cheeks, her smile gone, replaced by a determined frown.

The wind grew even stronger. I raised my hands to cover my face.

When I lowered them, she was gone.

Snow fell on my face.

There was nothing there.

Where was she?

There were no taxis.

There was nobody on the streets.

Why was it so cold?

I started shivering.

I ran back into the park.

My eyes frantically searched. I ran as fast as I could through the gale, my eyes bloodshot and red.

All the flowers were white.

The leaves were covered in white.

It was snowing.

I stopped.

My breathing was hard.

She stood ten feet in front of me, arms spread open, the wind blowing straight at me.

Snow piled on her clothes.

She was covered in snow, her body disappeared, there was nothing left but white.

I stumbled, almost falling.

I stood back up.

I reached forward. Trying to bridge a gap that was too far.

My hand outstretched.

The wind blew harder.

Why were there no other people in the park?

I couldn't stand the wind.

My eyes hurt.

I closed them.

Opened them again.

She was gone.

I looked around.

Everything was still there.

But she wasn't.

Why wasn't she?

I stared at the direction where she had left in. Nothing. Not even a shadow. Not anything.

The wind blew harder.

I was rooted to the spot.

The snow melted around me as it fell.

My outline was imprinted on the snow, matte-black pavement glistening through the white. My tears were imprinted on my face, white lines glistening through my red skin.

I was a snowman. A white figure in the middle of the white wonderland. My hair turned white. My heart turned black. And stopped. My face was frozen, mouth gaping and open.

I tore at my face. Streaks of blood flowed out. Red drops in the snow. Red pool in the snow. Red stream flowed towards where she was.

I tore at my shirt. Pieces of fabric came out. Multicolored bits in the snow. Multicolored bits in the wind. Multicolored bits blown away.

I tore myself apart from the inside. Bits of emotion came out. A ball of emotion at my feet. All my emotions blown away.

Snow fell into my throat. It tightened and closed. No sound came out.

Snow fell into my eye. It shut and stuck. It froze in place. Daggers of cold pierced my brain as did the pain.

Snow fell into my heart. It contracted and died. It stopped and beat. It beat no longer.

I fell over. I clutched at the air. I clutched at my last sight of her. I clutched at the lost love. I clutched at the memories.

I clutched no longer.

I laid frozen in the snow.