An Unconventional Solution

My mind kept churning on the drive up here.

So many things happening all at once, and none of them I could do anything about.

You might think that meant that I would just let the chips fall where they were destined to go, but that isn't the kind of person that I am.

Janey wanted a divorce. She had met the love of her life (the fifth one this week) at spin class—Antonio.

There had been Bert from yoga, Charlotte from swimming lessons, and the list went on.

She seemed serious this time. And, of course, that meant that our two boys would stay with me, so she could be free to pursue her new life.

I shook my head.

It would be rough, but her whims were more than old.

I was done.

Then there was Gran and her heart to consider.

And my mother's eye surgery, which meant I would be responsible for taking care of her and the boys once Jane left.

Dad was already in a care facility, but he was quite insistent that he wanted to come home, and I couldn't really blame him.

I was tired... and I felt all of the coming responsibilities pressing down on me with oppressive force.

To top it all off, we were broke.

My appliance business hadn't brought in enough for the house payment this month.

We needed money badly.

Janey couldn't work; she had the boys to look after.

I had tried to take on a second job, but it had caused the business to spiral further.

I didn't know what to do.

I was tired.

And so my thoughts looped over and over again.

I wished there was a solution.

No loan company or bank in their right mind would touch me.

I sighed, put the truck in park, and climbed out.

Closing the door to my red pickup truck, I stared up the path.

It was familiar and always had a way of clearing my mind, no matter how difficult times were.

I'd come here when both of the boys were born—we had been in bad shape then too—and I'd been able to sort it all out while walking this path and come back with solutions.

Janey told me I was boring and needed to quit worrying about everything... that everything would fix itself.

Hunh.

She never worried about money or the future or the kids.

She never helped her family out other than paying lip service to it and chiding anyone that didn't do more for their family.

I never realized how hypocritical she was.

Hmmm, another reason to start the divorce.

It would be costly but... honestly, worth it.

I was just so tired.

It felt like I was carrying everything on my back all alone... had been for years.

She always claimed that I never let her help, but whenever I asked she had tantrums and accused me of asking too much of her.

Good God, I was just so tired.

I started walking, and my feet moved on their own, guided by memory.

I could hear the lake over on my left and a little ways off.

I was pretty sure that my shoes had worn the stones out here shiny.

It was beautiful here and so peaceful... I could stay here forever.

Peace sounded real good right about now.

I didn't want to do this anymore.

And then it clicked...

I had myself insured for one million dollars.

It was more than enough to give those boys a good future and take care of Mom and Dad.

Gran was feisty. She would be okay and would keep the rest of the clan together.

They just needed an infusion of cash.

My business could go to Joan.

She was one hell of a manager.

It would need to look good, though... like an accident.

Had to be airtight.

A rustling in the brush nearby brought me back to the present.

I stopped on the path and scanned around to try to pinpoint the sound.

It was coming from over by the water.

I stood still and listened.

Perhaps it was a possum or some such—I didn't want to scare it.

Then I heard a faint crunching sound... almost like something was chewing on bark or rocks.

Curiosity got the better of me and I walked closer to look.

A faint slurping sound joined the odd symphony coming from the brush.

It sounded bigger the closer I came to the area with the noise.

I stood by the bush, rethinking my initial curiosity, when something came flying at me out of the brush.

Large and bowling-ball-shaped, it whizzed past my head.

Then the brush gave an almighty shudder and a strange-looking being stood from the greenery.

Tall, lanky, and scaled... with glowing green eyes fixed on me, it stood.

I saw its mouth area seemed to protrude.

A vaguely humanoid shape with such strange features...

I should have been terrified, but I stood frozen to the spot.

I may have been in shock, but it was hard to say.

My eyes went from its mouth, coated with a reddish liquid—looking much like blood—to what it held in its hands and then to the remnants on the grass where it had been before my interruption.

The tall creature held a leg, foot still attached.

The flesh had been torn from the look of it.

The whole appendage looked to have been ripped apart, flesh and bone hanging raggedly.

Bites gouged from the flesh... taken down to bone through ligament and sinew.

So that was what I had heard.

Hunh.

An arm lay in the grass, as well as various organs.

From the clothing and build of the appendages, whoever that had been was male, worked out, and favored black.

He would have had to be strong as hell.

This creature...

I wasn't getting away.

Well, I guess a solution had presented itself.

This was as accidental as it got.

The police would say it was bears.

Not exactly how I had pictured it, but... it would serve my purposes.

I sighed and stared at the creature mildly.

It blinked at me and cocked its head to the side, then made a strange gargling noise.

I stood and waited.

It tapped a spot behind its ear and then tried again.

"Food. Would you like some?"

It then proffered the leg to me.

I blinked at it.

It was offering me a meal.

"No, thank you though."

I nodded, an oddly polite gesture considering the circumstances.

It peered at me.

"You seem very unhappy. Food will help."

It lifted the leg to me again.

I waved it off.

"Thank you again, but no. I can't eat people."

It blinked at me.

"Why? Tastes good!"

It took a bite and chewed as though it was the best thing it had tasted, then went for another bite and another.

I smiled in spite of myself.

"Hunh. Well, it certainly seems as though you're enjoying it."

It nodded.

"Delicious. Come and have dinner."

It beckoned me, so I followed it. Not for a meal, but... for a change.

It was such an odd thing to encounter, and I strangely no longer felt tired.

I felt good.

We walked to the water's edge, and my host plucked a fish from the lake, offered it to me, and, at my headshake, shrugged and chomped it down in one bite.

"You are not hungry. Why are you unhappy?"

The creature squatted down by the water.

I sat on a stump and thought for a moment, then I told it a condensed version of why I was out here.

It nodded once and then pointed across the water to a small inlet where a silvery ship sat.

It shone in the growing darkness, gleaming in the fading light.

My mouth fell open, and the creature smiled.

"My reaction was much the same when I was small and saw the landing strips filled with these. My mother brought me there to see my future. My father was much the same as your Janey. When my mother grew tired of his nonsense... she ate him. Then we bought a larger ship and became merchants. It is a custom amongst my people. Cleaner that way, I think... from what you have told me."

It sat perfectly still.

I found myself frowning as I considered what it had said.

"You are from another world?"

It shook its head.

"We were originally from this one. Then we moved away. More peaceful."

I laughed...

Despite myself... I laughed, and I realized that sitting with this creature was the first time I had laughed in... I couldn't remember when.

"Yes, I imagine it would be. Well, I wish we had the same customs here. Sadly... can't cook and eat my wife. It would lead to jail time, and then my family would have no one. Thank you for the thought, though. Nice to think about."

It blinked and looked at me.

"I am still quite hungry and will need food for the journey home."

My eyes widened as I realized what it was saying.

"Do you now? Well, since you have been so hospitable to me... would you be interested in my wife? Or are you in a hurry to get going?"

It nodded.

"Absolutely. And I can wait a bit for a decent meal."

It sat back on its haunches, still as a rock.

I pulled out my phone.

Jane had a one-million-dollar insurance policy as well.

She picked up on the second ring.

She was clearly out of breath, and I heard rustling in the background.

"So, did you think about what we talked about earlier, Ben? You know I'd need the house, and you would need to give me something to live on. But you can have Tyler and Pete. I won't fight you at all."

I heard faint kissing noises on her end of the line.

I smiled.

"Where are the boys, Jane?"

"At your mother's."

Her tone made it sound as though that was the only place they could be.

My smile grew.

There would be an investigation, but I wasn't nearly strong enough to tear someone limb from limb, and besides, there wouldn't be anything left to investigate anyway.

"Good. Why don't you come on out to the trail so we can work out the details? I think it's time that we parted ways anyway. Bring Antonio if you want. Best to make this a clean break."

"Oh, I knew you'd see things my way. We will be there in thirty minutes. No, make it twenty. Ben, this is so wise of you."

She was giddy at the thought of no responsibility, money, and a house.

I smiled and hung up.

The creature looked at me.

"Twenty minutes? For two entrées... better than takeout."

I smiled and laughed.

Well, a solution had indeed presented itself.

Janey was right after all.