A Solar Oydessy

It’s been a long time since I’ve been really afraid of dying. In my, almost five billion years alive, death is still a certainty. Just not by old age anymore. Science once improved so much that medicine allowed the body to decay slower, and last as long as the heart is still beating.

One dose that lasts a lifetime.

Still, accidents happen. Death still claims those who fall victim to car accidents, plane crashes, or murder. There’s no restarting a dead and damaged heart.

It all had to end eventually, though. I’ve been lucky to live as long as I have, to be the oldest human still alive. There is nothing – no technology or agency – that can stop the annihilation of the human race this time.

I did everything in my power to save humanity. Five billion years of experience, determination, and knowledge have all come down to this. All that time working towards finding technology to travel to another solar system, and I could never figure it out.

If only I had more time. Maybe I could have figured out how to keep the sun from dying and eradicating all living beings in its wake.

My entire life has been dedicated to enhancing technology and saving humanity. What was it all for, in the end? What have I actually accomplished in the last five billion years that actually has any meaning?

Yes, my memory is beginning to fade. It’s a recent development, but frustrating nonetheless. No matter how hard I try to keep the image in my mind, I’m beginning to forget what his face looked like. What his voice sounded like.

Hundreds of thousands of civilizations rising and falling. I witnessed it all. Did my best to help them advance. No matter what I did, they all failed. Every single one of them. No push in the right direction could save them.

I’m still not sure how I’ve been lucky enough to survive this long. Accidents happen, still I’ve avoided death. And yet, I never had enough time.

There is nothing I wanted to learn that I missed out on, or tried. I’ve become skilled in many aspects. But the knowledge of how to save the sun or reach another solar system has remained beyond my reach.

All that time and effort. What was it all for?

The current growing civilization hasn’t reached its peak yet. Time is running out for them. For me. There are only a couple hundred years or so left before the sun explodes and they won’t advance by then to do anything at all.

I wrap my animal skin coat tighter around me. It was made from a large fox that fits like a heavy trench coat. There is nothing like it. I bartered for it with a hunter that took the animal down outside the village. The village sits fifteen miles away from my hut. All it took was a few armfuls of wood and the skin was mine.

The pelt is unlike anything I’ve seen. Pure white base with sections of red all over. Once I had the pelt, making the coat was easy. While I could have had someone in the village to make it, they don’t have the skills or knowledge that I’ve perfected over the years.

Maybe if I had more time.

Either way, it doesn’t matter anymore. Still, I feel like I have to stick it out to the very end. Might be worth it to witness the sun explode. I guess I’ll see.

A chilled wind blows against my cheeks. Fall and Winter are the only two seasons here in the mountains. Winter is quickly approaching, which means it’s time to stock up. With how far up I am, blizzards are coming. And soon.

Barking below me reminds me of the dwindling sunlight, even though it has only just risen. Winter brings short days, even if the sun is warm. Up on my mountain, away from the village, the heat doesn’t bother me so much. I can sit on the cliff above my hut and watch them bustle about like ants on a hill.

Kai, my large dog, barks up at me again and I sigh.

“Yes, old boy,” I call down to him.

Turning a heart-shaped locket over in my hands, I’m reminded of how he is all I have left in this world. The locket was a gift I gave to my wife many lives ago. Even the pictures inside have faded to dust.

“I’m not going to forget about you,” I chuckle.