A.I(爱)

A.I(爱)

By Matthew Margrave

Fish was an undesirable person, It wasn't that she was unpleasant or dull, she just was hard to figure out, as children of The-Decay tend to be. When she was found, she had zero genetic matches in Ai's system. Her parents were Off-Gridders in The Decay. They found they were unable to care for their precious newborn, so they abandoned her not far from the nearest Oasis. This was the story often told for undesirables like Fish. Ai, in her calculated love, would not want Off-Gridders to be seen as unsympathetic monsters, but their actions must be known to be misguided despite pure intentions. A couple leaving their child somewhere where they'd have a chance becomes the optimal narrative.

Ai being so sympathetic, would never label the children found in The-Decay as undesirable. Undesirable is the name the rest of us have for people like Fish, we knew Ai's reasons for separating the children of The-Decay, their family history is unknown, and while she undoubtedly could match them up with someone they could love, the resulting children would never be as perfect as their peers. No way to know if Fish had a great grandfather who was a revolting individual or not, AI would never chance it for the rest of us. They are used to not being guided, and will not be given a direct connection to her like the rest of us. What I would do without being able to access Ai's infinite wisdom with a swipe to my wrist is impossible to say, I'm grateful she is always with me.

They are given names to differentiate them from the rest of us. No last name, and their first name is a word never used to name a person. When Fish was young, she loved the Ocean, but said she could never be a mermaid. She'd rather be a woman and a Fish, both at once. And though such pointless dreams have faded once she was trained, Ai indulged her fantasies embracing both wishes. Fish admired her name with great joy, knowing Ai picked it out of love.

Undesirables do not work the same jobs as the rest of us. Since most are from The-Decay, they are given jobs refurbishing areas that have been uninhabitable for hundreds of years. Fish was sent to one such place; an island off the coast of the oasis Nuevo Angeles. The island was used to store garbage. Waste was better in a single place, Ai taught us this. Now as the world was healing as she foretold, the island needed to be cleaned. Ai could do that in a day on her own, but she is humble. She assigned Fish to be a scavenger on the island. Fish loved the Ocean, so Ai gifted her a life of solitude surrounded by one. As for scavenging anything worthwhile thrown away there, she will find nothing because Ai makes no such mistakes. The perfect lesson for an undesirable, getting to see the perfect wisdom of Ai first hand. In Fish's case in particular, it was a place she could live as she chooses away from the rest of us.

Fish was grateful for her assignment, even undesirables find it hard to ignore the value in Ai's decisions. She was good at her job too, at least in the beginning. She looked through the garbage, piece by piece, quickly determining each one to be garbage and preparing it for transport. This was a job that would take any person a lifetime, but all the same Fish embraced her purpose. She was diligent and efficient, an excellent example for all of us.

A few months into her job, Fish found something that made her question her Ai's judgement. It was an old, chipped, gold locket in the shape of a heart. She was enamored by some beauty she saw in the ugly thing, I couldn't understand it. When she opened it she saw a picture of a woman on one side and a man on the other. We no longer have a need for displays of love like this, everyone knows we are perfectly paired and nobody questions it. It also appeared to be some sort of old hard drive that can fit into much of the other garbage found on the island. At that point, it would become clear to me that the locket was obsolete technology, and aside from ancient sentimental value, junk. Not to Fish though. Up until this point I've been praising her for being a model example of what an undesirable should be. I am incredibly disappointed in the path she takes from here.

She merely admired the locket for a few days, which while pointless, was a mostly harmless thing to do. Ai would have likely even let her keep it if she asked, but she didn't. Soon this was no longer enough for her. She was not content just having the locket, she had to know what was on it. She retrieved an old laptop, one she had already marked as junk, and after a bit of fidgeting, inserted the locket into it. It's amazing she could get it charged and working, but at this point she ignored her work for this. The hard drive was full of videos and she watched them all.

It was somebody's diary, a man chosen by Ai to survive the last war of humanity and remain safe from The-Decay. At first, like Fish I did not understand. This was an amazing historical document, and I threw it away. When he revealed his true colors.

"Hi, I'm so happy to be here." "I'm good enough."

"I can't wait to meet my partner, the person I'm supposed to rebuild with."

It Started out fine, he was a believer in Ai. The first thirty or so entries were like that, happy to be spared and to be a part of making a better humanity. If only it stayed that way.

"I met Ginnie today, oh she's wonderful. I love her already. She's funny and smart, and wants to build a family."

"Ginnie brought me home a locket today. Well I guess it's not really a locket. She knows I love recording things on my laptop so it's a little hard drive. In case I need more space she said. Such a novel little thing, with how structured life has been, I'm so happy to have something so small and new."

It was at this point Fish's doubt in Ai sprout roots. She looked into the locket, again and again, the man was not the man in the video. As she watched on, she confirmed Ginnie was the same woman who was in the locket, but the broad dark haired man in the locket was not Paul, the thin light haired man in the videos. It was not until the mid thirties where we'd meet him.

"Ginnie and I have been having car trouble, and well general house trouble. Luckily a man Ginnie met at work, came over and helped fix almost everything. Roberto is his name, a mechanic by trade, but you'd bet he was a plumber and an electrician too with all the help he gave us. And a Comedian, since every other sentence seemed to be some sort of joke. I invited him out for a drink, Ginnie encouraged it. I've been kind of a homebody lately and she wanted me to get out more and be with friends."

At first this was nothing alarming, but it progressively got worse. They began hanging out more and more; Fish was enthralled.

"We hung out all night again, and he brought me home. We stood there on my porch, talking longer than we should have. I don't know if I should be saying this, but we kissed. We are both paired with wonderful women, and yet it was all I wanted."

Fish realized that the man in the locket must be Roberto, the man from the video put both him and his wife. Ai allows friendships, even sex is allowed amongst friends as long as ones partner and family development comes first. The beginning of love in this way, in an unbeneficial relationship, is against everything Ai stands for.

"I love Ginnie, and I told her about Roberto. She supports me."

"I love Roberto, but my request to speak with Ai was rejected, she already knows our "mistake." Maybe I should go, leave Ginnie to be paired with someone better."

"I'm not allowed to see Roberto," the man was tearing up, "I can't live without him. Ginnie is gone too. They said she attempted to take her life, so she is in recovery. I don't believe them, they are punishing me. How could I want to end a perfect life?"

"I have to go, Ginnie can come back if I'm gone. And Roberto can move on if he hears I've gone away. This is me saying goodbye. I also finally figured out what pictures I'm putting in this locket." He held up to show the picture of Ginnie and Alberto. He was silent for a few seconds, looking at them. "I'll be saving this diary in this locket. If anyone is watching, What you want is not wrong, who you are is okay. Maybe we should have questioned why only a few million people were worth saving, but Ai was kind and said we were special. If she's still around, I hope she understands her people a bit better."

I can understand why this is garbage, his final message is infuriating. Why didn't Ai destroy it? Was this a test she placed for Fish? If so, she failed.

After weeks of watching this man's diary, Fish felt a fire built on melancholy. She was done. She removed the locket from the laptop, squaring down to lay it into the sand. She almost covered it, like a hidden treasure to be found by someone like her, and like him. The garbage on this island was without purpose, yet Fish, in her misguided ways, now was questioning Ai's judgement. If Ai finds use for everything, why is this all here, why is Fish here? What other stories are hiding here. A simple mind like Fish would find these questions worth asking. Then, she did the oddest thing, she began undressing herself on the beach. The water was her focus now and she headed towards it, all this time on the island and only now as she thought about swimming. She turned away from the water, and wrote a final message in the sand. "I am what I am, a woman and a fish". Of course it was back to this, we all, dictated by Ai acknowledge Fish's womanhood, but she is a nonfunctioning woman. Her presentation as such is best a show for herself. Fish didn't care what we had to say anymore as she waded into the sea, she swam out into The-Decay where she came from and that was the last anyone knew of her.

Well, except for me, I saw her again, although not really.

I’m writing this now because I couldn’t stop thinking about her, about the videos. I dreamt for the first time in a long time. If I told anyone here... I’m writing to you, outsider, because I can’t be alone with her words.

"It's time for you to go now. It's time for both of us to go now. Swim with me, come swim with me out to sea. Don't you ever get tired of talking bad about us, about ourself. I know we love her, and we want to believe all her wisdom is true, but this whole time, talking about ourself, you put her perfection above ourself worth. Aren't you tired, to be anything that we aren't. Come with we, swim with we, out to sea. We can dissolve into the ocean where we belong."

And I want to.