92 April's Fool Not, Want Not

I'm nobody's fool.

You're not going to get anything past me. No way. I can't tell you how many so-called "friends" have tried to take advantage of me. Asking for this favor or that consideraton. Not me.

I don't care how close they are, whether they're family, or how minor an inconvenience it'd be for me, I'm not doing somethin' for nothin'. I'm a tit-for-tat guy. In this life, that's only fair.

They say I'm tight. But I'm just careful. When I hear the adage to not loan money you're not prepared to get back, I'm just going to sidestep the entire problem and not loan money.

And since time is money, the same goes with my time. I'll not waste it. If I were to take time for someone else, then there's less for me to do what I do.

And I do very well indeed. No thanks to the fools who would have me join their fool ranks. I will be nobody's fool.

That being said, it's not lost on me how lucky I am. I can afford to be the man who is an island. Neither a lender nor a debtor, be: that's me — both ways. And it's part of the reason I do so very-well-indeed! Because really, it's not luck, , is it?

If you live marginally, if you live paycheck-to-paycheck, if you struggle to help others by tapping into what little you have, then who's fault is that?

Think of how well off you'd be if you didn't have to raise any children. Think of the car you could drive if you didn't have to buy a wife one. Think how often you'd be able to afford a first class meal at a 5-star restaurant if you didn't have to feed others. Or clothe others. Or support others. Or bail others out, both figuratively and literally.

They're gonna turn off your electricity if you don't get a partial payment in by 5 PM? It won't be a partial payment for me to help you out — it'll just be payment.

I hope I'm never in such a position, because the only downside is that no one's fool is nobody's friend.

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AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Word count (excluding notes): 366

Submitted for April Fool's Day, April 1, 2024.

2024: A Story-a-Day for the whole year. This one is #92.

All pictures are AI-generated, but my foolishness is not!