296 Wake-up Call

I made bullet lists. The first was one of physical characteristics—age, weight, height, shoe size, and a dozen other aspects that make me unique.

I inserted eight generations of my family tree.

I blocked, copied, and pasted my entire diary which I had been writing daily since my teenage years. I uploaded the TIFF scans of hand-written personal reflections from before that.

I added decades of 1040 IRS returns. I scanned in all of my grade school report cards; not just the grades—but the comments, too:

"Doesn't apply himself,"

"Talks too much,"

"Unfocused,"

"Doesn't pay attention,"

"Self-indulgent."

There was even that 4th-grade jerk PhysEd teacher's—Mr. Miller's—comment:

"He refuses to learn how to do jumping jacks right, and if he doesn't shape up, he'll never amount to anything."

That piece of shit.

I added my high school transcripts, college records, and employment quarterly reviews from each time I got sacked.

I then placed my marriage legal documents and its religious ceremony records. I added the legal court transcripts of the alimony and custody battles with my ex-wife. Next, I raided my social media accounts, reproducing the personal photos, snarky comments both by and about me, and the letters of reprimand from school, work, and even some personal, heart-breaking letters from disgruntled friends and ex- lovers.

I attached my IQ test and a psychological profile from a job I didn't get.

I wrote my most cherished memories about my parents, loved ones, and friends, but also included a bigger list of blurbs about people who had wronged me, cheated me, or caused pain.

I filled out a questionnaire, answering the following:

"Who would you most like to meet?"

"What historical characters do you most admire?"

"What one mistake would you most like to un-do?"

There were more, and I answered them all honestly and with feeling.

Now, I columnated all of the data into the AI template, applying the advanced Language Model to engage the Generative AI engine to answer the following question:

"What happens next for me in my life?"

Within 0.0825 seconds, it displayed its response:

"Don't bother me again until you learn to do jumping jacks right."

My God! Could Mr. Miller have been right?

_____________

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

For Tuesday, October 22, Day 296 of the 2024 Story-a-Day Challenge

366 WORDS (without A/N)

72 DAYS TO GO! THIS CHALLENGE JUMPS ON, 366 JACKS A DAY.

There are currently three Vocal writers, jumpin' jacks and jackin' jumps, in this 2024 Story-a-Day Challenge:

• L.C. Schäfer (Up and Down)

• Rachel Deeming (Down and Up)

• Gerard DiLeo (Askew)