Where Would I Be?

I thought to myself yesterday, “where would I be without my son? Would I be doing my life so right without him?” Often times mother’s wonder how good they are. I on the other hand always think I am the worst. It’s only because of what my son’s dad and his family have put me through. I though realize I wouldn’t be who I am if he didn’t do some of the things he did. I wouldn’t be as over protective of my son.

In my 19 years of life I never wanted a child. Well that changed as soon as I found out I was pregnant. At the age of 19 I was thrilled I was having a child. 2 1/2 years later my baby Daniel had changed my life for the better. Some mothers didn’t need saving from anything but myself my child saved me from a lot of trouble. He has made me be able to wake up every morning and do my very best in life.

As a young mom, I have learned that you don’t need any other person in your life but your child. As it may seem some women reassured by everyone. As long as my son smiles at me I know I’m doing my very best.

Sometimes though I wish I had a partner in crime my own age. I then think, “Do I really need a man to help me get through my day?” I’ve gotten a better job for my son. I’ve been in my own place for now 3 years. I don’t think I could have done it if it wasn’t for him.

So for all the moms especially the ones at a young age like myself I give you so much credit. You give up a lot of things a young person is able to do. I never went to parties but now that I have him to don’t think I could ever do a night club ever. It’s only because I don’t want to disappoint him. I do though have a night to myself and I do have a little fun.

Christmas this year is gonna be full of love and laughter. I actually get to have my baby boy. I get to see him open a few presents from a couple family members. I’m really excited because I was actually able to get him a few things as well. To see his face when he goes to open gifts is gonna be the best part of the day. Even though he doesn’t fully understand what Christmas is; the fact that he should be able to open gifts is the greatest feeling I have ever had.

To know that I get to spoil someone other that my parents is the best. My life have never been so full of joy around Christmas until I had my son.

I never truly understood why parents have so much joy in there eyes when they see their children until I had a child of my own. To be able to raise a child is the best feeling I have had. He is the best thing that could have ever happen to me. I never felt this much peace with myself. Even that feeling of knowing I would graduate from high school even though I didn’t think I would could never surpass the excitement I have now.

Daniel, my son, could not have been the best gift from God that I could ever ask for. All I ask for now is that he becomes the best he can be. As he grows I will grow as well. He has taught me things that I never would have learned without him. He had taught me how to love someone more than anything in the world. I hope one day he will find someone that will love him as much as I love him.