Tell your children 'No'

Learn to tell your kid no. No, they cannot have that cookie. No we can’t go inside. Teach them how to deal with rejection, with failure. Teach them to LOSE. Why? So they learn how to build character, gumption and class. Yes class. It takes class to have someone yell in your face and you tactfully tell them to go to hell, so they actually look forward to the trip. They need to learn that the world does NOT revolve around them and their bubble. Their art isn’t the most magnificent thing you’ve ever seen, and their face isn’t made for tv, its made for radio. Sound too harsh? Please let me explain...

Yes you should encourage your kids. Yes you should love them and build their courage and confidence up, but not to be a pretentious jerk the rest of society later has to teach manners or put up with.

So when they ask how their art is, instead of saying ‘its magnificent!’, instead ask, ‘I love your use of color, what is it about?’ let them explain themselves, not only will they get to share a bit about themselves, but they learn to express themselves better through a medium, and vocally. And learn that when making art, it should mean something to them and they should be prepared to explain it.

And PLEASE, enough of this participation trophy crap. We need to stop raising kids to wear bubble wrap but instead teach them how to deal with bullies, failure, and mean comments.

First order, get off the phones! Yes, that means you parents. Watch your kids, engage with your kids, stop letting a tv or device raise them and then wonder why they are so distant. Kids learn by example. If they only see you communicating through a device, that becomes their new normal. And if all they see is a false sense of perfection that is unattainable in social media they will strive for an unattainable goal or nothing at all.

Secondly, a 10yr old does not need a cell phone. They do not need social media. They need to...wait for it... Be. A. KID! Let then run outside, scrap their knees, explore, make up games, be rambunctious! They shouldn’t under any circumstances have to worry about their bodies, about being fat, too skinny, being anyone other than who they are. And you as a parent need to realize that it’s your job to protect them, encourage them, love them and let them be kids for as long as you can while teaching them how to be a mature and well adjusted adult.

3rd. Let them fail. Yes I said it. Your kid isn’t a genius. Let them fail, then teach them how to pick themselves up and try again. Teach them to not quit, but to try harder, shift their focus and reapply their goals, attain those goals and build momentum. Teach them it’s ok to fail. The greatest minds in history all failed more than they succeeded! Just look what Einstein, Jefferson, Edison, Tesla all accomplished! They all failed, no exceptions.

4. Say no. The world doesn’t revolve around them, they will not always get their way. Teach them they are NOT always right, and will have to deal with rejection. Whether it’s for a chocolate chip cookie, or a woman’s cookie. There will be times in this life that they will be turned down for a job or someone’s affection, and they need to learn to handle it with grace. I cannot begin to describe the immaturity I deal with on a daily basis when I tell someone ‘no’ for whatever reason and they lose it. Your sense of entitlement isn't worth me losing my job over, sorry, not sorry.

5. Teach them patience. They are not the center of the world's universe, even if they are the center of yours. Patience helps gain empathy and understanding because when they learn to wait, they inherently learn to listen.

So please, from one human to another, learn to tell your children 'No'.