So, You’re Going to Your First Swim Lesson — Here’s What to Expect.

So, you’re ready to take the plunge, but you don’t know exactly what a first swim lesson might entail?

First lessons can be rough for everyone involved and more often than not swim lessons can be a child’s first introduction into a more formal learning experience, making it even more important for this experience to be fun and easy.

Preparing for a good, fun, and easy first lesson can take a little bit of effort but taking the time to put it in now will make all the difference in the long run.

The key here is patience. Take the appropriate time to prepare, don’t rush, and let your child acclimate.

Let me just start with, MOST kids cry.

If they don’t cry the first class they might (and probably will) the second. But that is not to scare you, some kids never cry, and kids some cry much longer than you would expect. But don’t give up, it will stop—I promise.

Even more important to understand, crying is not a reason to stop swim lessons (let me repeat that) crying is NOT a reason to stop swim lessons.

Crying is simply a form of communication, although it’s not efficient communication. Crying, in this situation, simply serves to let us know that your child is uncomfortable—remember, they are never in danger.

But don’t mistake my words for giving up your own boundaries. Every family is different, every parenting style is different and every child is different. All of these factors work together to shape how your child will respond to these extraneous situations (like strangers, separation anxiety, and even being told “no”). At the end of the day, you have the final say.

So, why do kids cry in a swim lesson?

Crying happens for a lot of different reasons and sometimes crying isn’t even about fear. Sometimes it’s that they simply don’t want to do what we’re asking them to do.

Here are a few of the main reasons kids cry during swim lessons:

• Separation anxiety
• Stranger danger
• Fear of the water
• Sensory overload
• Big life changes (a new sibling, moving, starting school, divorce)
• They are challenged to step outside their comfort zone

The key here is getting a child to use their words. Take the time to strengthen communication, it builds trust. Experienced teachers will know this, they will work to get your child to express their fears and distress in a manner that works to build that trust.

So, what does a first lesson actually look like?

This will depend on the swim school you go to, different swim schools have different lesson lengths, curriculums, and teacher to student ratios.

Expect to take a bit of time, in the beginning, to talk to your instructor. This will eat into the amount of time your child is in the water but it will go a long way in setting the tone for all swim lessons to follow. Step back, don’t hover, and let your child and teacher get to know one another — even if they are crying.

Once the lesson is complete, your teacher should take some time to brief you. They may offer some suggestions, tips, or simply just an overview of their observations during the lesson. This should take a few minutes of the scheduled lesson time and is important to the progress of your child.

Feel free to ask questions but remember they likely have a lesson following yours. If you have more questions than time, take the time at the beginning of your next lesson to ask them. Your education is just as valuable as time spent in the water even it means less time in the water for your child.

Trust takes time. What might look like “play” is often “real work”.

More often than not a first swim lesson is more play than work, but don’t mistake this for not being work. Trust your teacher! Play doesn’t always mean playing (or even wasting time). Bonding is essential for trust. And trust is essential for progress.

Think about the last time you were in a fear state, do you think you could learn complex math? Or read high-level novels? Probably not. Give your child — and your teacher — time to get to know one another, to learn how the other “ticks”.

How can you prepare for a first swim lesson?

The best thing you can do would be to bring your child in before they even begin, let them observe and take everything in. Sensory overload is real, and children experience it no matter their background.

Don’t let the first time they actually get in the water be a swim lesson, find time to go to the pool together — and play!

If you can, get into the water just the two of you — don’t go under, don’t try to teach them anything, simply just experience and have fun! Having a positive introduction to the water can be crucial for the overall tone of a first swim lesson. Let your teacher do the teaching, stick to playing until a level of trust with the water has been established.

If you can’t get to a pool, practice in the bathtub.

Practice “going under” by pouring water over their face

**(Tip: establish a routine, say something like “1,2,3 under” just before pouring water, and don’t forget to cheer them on!)

But, let’s face it, as a parent you are busy.

You’re probably juggling work, after school activities, sports, other children, and now swim lessons. You might not have time for all the extra bells and whistles — or your swim school might not offer it.

What can you do?

• Don’t talk about water like it is scary. Talk about how fun learning to swim will be! This is exciting and it should be fun!
• Involve them in the preparation process, pick out a swimsuit, goggles, a towel, even a swim cap. They will be much more excited about things if they feel more in control.
• Take time to talk with your teacher, let them know you want them to have fun for their first lesson. Let them know the things that make your child tick (are they sensitive, loud, boisterous, defiant, stubborn, playful, imaginative? Do they love superheroes, princesses, or maybe its animals?). The more input you can provide the more your teacher can understand how to help and deflect crying or stubbornness.

What would be the best first swim lesson outcome?

Obviously a perfect lesson is the ideal outcome, but that's not always the case. The best thing we can hope for would be that they get in the water and finish the lesson. Whether that means they cry for the lesson, they play for the lesson, or they put their face in the water and swim a full length of the pool for the first time, it is all a success no matter how much or how little they accomplish. You both got through it.

The goal is to leave the first lesson happy and excited to come back, but we don’t always hit our goals on the first try. So be realistic with your expectations and generous with your encouragement.

So the real question, when will they be able to swim?

There is no real clear cut answer to this question. Don’t ask your teacher, they won’t know either.

The truth is every kid is different. Some learn to swim in two lessons, some take months, some make it across the pool only to realize how hard (or scary) it was and then you have to start all over. Age matters, cognitive skills matter, development matters, fears matter, shifts in the home matter, health matters, the teacher-student bond matters, your level of engagement (or appearance of frustration) matters, everything matters.

Be realistic with your expectations, it’s unlikely your kid will be the next Michael Phelps or Janet Evans. The most important thing that matters is that they are on their way to being the safest they can possibly be around water.

Have a question? Email me here: [email protected]

I’ll be glad to answer your question, direct you to an existing article, or write up an article just for you.