Safety in the Savanna

“I know you liked George and Stephanie, but your new house is going to be wonderful! They have a little girl just your age and a beautiful backyard with a tree house and everything. You’ll be able to have so many adventures.” Miss Sandy tried to reassure Amelia, but the young girl recognized the familiar look of pity and doubt on her social worker’s face. As the two drove away from the little blue house on Spring Rose Drive, Amelia beat herself up for thinking this time was going to be different. Sandy looked back at the girl and listened as she lamented on the loss. “She called me Mia and told me she was going to be my mama, but this morning she told me that since George is sick she can’t be my mama anymore.”

Amelia thought back to last week, when she found the couple crying in the living room late one night. She had snuck downstairs to get some chocolate milk and heard George and Stephanie talking quietly in the other room. She peaked around the corner and saw the two huddled on the couch, grasping on to each other as if the world was falling apart around them. “I know how much you love her Steph, but I won’t be able to work through treatments and we can barely afford anything as it is. She deserves another foster home where they can give her the care she deserves.Time is all I have left to give, and it’s not enough to share with anyone but you.” At this, Amelia’s heart sank. She ran up to her room and grabbed Raffa, her stuffed giraffe. He was stained, his fur matted and the stuffing was all lumpy, but he was the girl’s guide to another world. She squeezed him tight as the room around her turned into a familiar savanna landscape.

She had been visiting the African drylands since she had received Raffa from one of her first social workers. She would climb up on his tall back and ride him through the imaginary land. No matter how many times she had to move in real life, at least here she had her very own hut and the same school with the same friends. She would roam throughout the savanna on a search for a mom that would love her. It was on these parent-seeking safaris that she would spend the majority of her time with Raffa, each time spotting a shadowy figure in the distance. Even though she couldn’t make it out, she always knew it was someone who loved her and was waiting for her. It was usually at this point in her fantasy that she was rudely awakened to the reality of her life. There was no savanna. There was no mom. No friends. No beautiful hut. Yet there was always Raffa, still clenched in her hopeful hands.

Weeks had passed since going to live with the Singhs, and Amelia was beginning to adjust to her new life. She loved watching Mrs. Singh arrange flowers into vases “for sick people, and happy people, and sad people” as was explained to her by Sammi, the youngest of the 3 other children who lived in the house. She would look on in wonder at the ability her foster mom had of taking each individual flower and pairing it with unexpected plants to create a colorful and comforting combination. She wanted so much to be part of this new family; a peony added to an arrangement of roses.

After a long day of playing “pirates” with the other children, Amelia ran inside unknowingly tracking a long trail of mud behind her. Mr. Singh saw this and raised his voice, upset at the sight of the filthy carpet. Amelia quickly covered her face, expecting to be struck by a belt or a heavy hand, but when she realized the physical punishment wasn’t coming, she grabbed Raffa and ran out the door with the fear that something even worse was going to happen.

Mrs. Singh watched through the window as Amelia climbed up the ladder to the treehouse. “I’ll handle it” she said to her husband, who appeared distraught at the fact that he had made the girl undoubtedly relive traumas from her past homes. She went upstairs to her bedroom closet and pulled out a shoebox. It was all she had left of her childhood, but she had a feeling that Amelia’s life had not been much different from her own. She knew what she needed to do.

With the patched up box in one hand and a juice box in the other, Mrs. Singh climbed up to the treehouse. She found Amelia huddled in a corner holding her stuffed giraffe, shaking and crying inconsolably.

“Hey sweet girl, I want you to know that Mr. Singh is sorry that he yelled. You know he would never hurt you right?” Amelia didn’t look up, but she began to cry a little softer. “What is your giraffe’s name?” When Amelia didn’t respond to her foster mom, Mrs. Singh continued “Well. He must be a really good friend of yours. He must love you very much.” At this the girl looked up and began to quietly tell of Raffa’s ability to take her to a place where everything was safe.

Mrs. Singh reached next to her, opening up the shoebox. Her fingers softly touched a small stuffed barn owl. He was the only one who knew the pain she had suffered at the hands of her father and brother growing up, and she knew that it was time for him to move on and help another girl. Mrs. Singh pulled out the stuffed animal.

“This is Ollie” Mrs. Singh started, “He is my best friend. When I was a little girl like you, there were some bad people that hurt me. I used to squeeze him tight while I was scared, and he would take me on his wings and fly me to a field of flowers. The sun was always out and everything smelled fresh. We would run around in the field and sometimes we even explored other lands together. One time we went to the jungle and I met some monkeys.”

At this, Amelia moved closer to Mrs. Singh.

“You know what?” her foster mom asked.

“What?”

“I was just asking Ollie where he wanted to go next.”

“Really!?”

“He told me he has always longed to go on an African safari!”

Eyes wide with interest, Amelia climbed on to Mrs. Singh’s lap and hugged her giraffe tight. She was back on the savanna, riding Raffa towards a bright colored blur in the distance. She knew they were on one of their quests searching for someone. “Where are we going?” she asked, but it became clear when they arrived in a field full of flowers of every color. She saw the familiar shadowy figure, but instead of disappearing into the dark, it moved closer. Amelia’s eyes filled with tears and she sighed a breath of relief. There, beside a patch of tall sunflowers was Mrs. Singh stroking the feathers of Ollie as she reached out to Amelia, beckoning her to come closer.