Lessons In Resilience And Strength Combined With So Much Love

The lessons my mom taught me cannot be measured as her teaching continues throughout my adulthood. A mother's love does not stop the day their child leaves the nest. A mother still has so much wisdom to share and I never want mine to stop sharing with me. I am not even sure my mom knows how much she means to me but I know she taught me unconditional love. She taught me that I am strong and capable. She taught me what resiliency is and to always push forward. She taught me independence and she reminds me almost every day that I can persevere.

I was prepared for motherhood long before I became a mom and I am so grateful to her for that. I was not blessed with the ability to birth my own children, but I am blessed that my mom taught me never to give up on a dream. As a child, I dreamed of becoming a mom. I thought the more children the merrier I would be. My husband is somewhat older than I, and he blessed me with 3 bonus daughters that I love so much. Early on in our marriage, we found out that I have infertility problems that several doctors tried to help me with. Sadly, none of them could figure out why I could not get pregnant. I felt totally defeated, discouraged, and destroyed. My mom however pushed me to keep trying. She researched options and rattled them off to me over and over. It had to be terribly hard for her to push me that way when I felt so low. I am so glad she did push though. She helped me sort through fertility options and she showered me with support. At the time, I had wonderful health insurance that covered infertility treatments as long as I was willing to travel a few hours away to see a fertility specialist that accepted my insurance.

There were so many visits and my husband could not miss work unless absolutely necessary. I could not fathom doing this alone and luckily I never had to. My mom stepped up and drove me to every appointment that my husband could not attend. She met the Doctors, learned along with me, and she gave me countless injections to help prepare me for in vitro fertilization. She even helped pay for the hotels whenever it was just too hard or too tiring to drive back and forth. When the procedure did not take, she showed me so much love but she also remained positive when I could not. She continued to help me with this process three more times. She helped me through three more failed attempts. I cannot even imagine how painful that was for her but I am so grateful that she wouldn't let me give up. At the time, I couldn't understand how anything positive could come out of four failed in vitro cycles. Now, looking back, I know that loss made me stronger. My husband and I have since adopted two sons from foster care and our losses are now our greatest blessings. If not for her insistence and strength, I am not sure I would feel this way.

As a mom now, I understand the sacrifices she made out of love. I understand all the tough choices she made and I am so grateful to her. I am blessed that she is both my mom and my friend. She makes me a better Mom as she reminds me of the importance of rest and self-care. She supported me through every infertility procedure. She became a back-up parent for added support through our fostering process. She showed love and care to every foster child as they came and went. She cried with me when loosing them broke my heart. When my bonus daughters moved to Florida with their mom, my mom became my traveling partner. She has traveled up and down the Southern East Coast with me to pick them up and take them home several times each year. When our grandchildren came for visits from Florida, she accompanied us on our outings loving on all of our children and helping whenever she can. A few years ago when my husband and I wanted to try again to get pregnant, she supported us even when it pained her to see me hurting again from something she could not control.

I am a better women, mom, and friend because of my mom. I am strong and able because she taught me to be. I can only pray that my children will feel the same way about me as they grow older that I feel about my mom.