Feels like home

There are three of us. THREE. And speaking of 3s I was 33 the year I met my SISTERS for the very first time. This was our first picture taken together. EVER. They are 12 & 15 years older than me, we share the same father , or sperm donor as I like to call him. He was married to Ginna ( my sisters mother) and while pregnant with Ashley the middle sister, my “ father” left a note for Ginna that had Heather age 2 and Ashley in her belly at just 4 months, he said “ he couldn’t handle it” and left. Walked out never looked back. Fast forward some years he meets Tricia, MY MOM, and they marry have me and lo & behold the crackpot does it again! Except this time my mom kicked him out , after letting him come back a few times, she had ENOUGH. Filled for sole custody he of course never contested and that WAS THAT. I always knew I had “ sisters” not just step but actual BLOOD siblings... but I grew up an only child and I never had any kind of relationship with my sisters or my father ... up until March 2020. My father reached out to the three of us, said he had written a book and it was dedicated to “ his girls” convenient we were his girls when he needed to sound like a nice caring man son people would read his literal CRAP book, none the less it went to ALL THREE OF US. And I am the firmest believer that “ everything happens for a reason” cool story about that for another time. Never the less... they both reached out to me, through social media, told me they wanted to know their “ sister” they wanted me to know my NIECES AND NEPHEWS... they loved me . Talk V about throwing someone for a loop... I went from being an only child with no siblings or any nieces or nephews to overnight having two sisters. A brother in law, and FIVE nieces and nephews. There were EIGHT people, eight family members, who knew about me and WANTED to know me! Be a part of my life.

We started voraciously sharing emails with pictures and stories and memories ... literally EVERYTHING. I felt like I had known them my whole life it was the most natural and fulfilling thing I have ever experienced. They happen to live in Fresno, Ca and I am in Houston, TX... and it’s 2020 , world wide pandemic, but I HAD to meet them ... if I didn’t do it NOW, I would of talked myself out of it, because well that’s what I do! OVER THINK EVERY LITTLE THING! So I literally wasted NO TIME. As soon as I knew my schuedle and figured out Symantec’s I was on EXPEDIA and had booked my flight for 5 full days at the end of October , to meet my FAMILY. They were just as shocked as I was I think... but they were excited and of course had been encouraging me to come , I just don’t V think they thought I Would do it SO QUICKLY.

I did. And the anticipation and what if’s grew with each passing day. We continued talking and learning about eachother , learning we had SO MUCH In common, I shared more with these two strangers practically than I had with ANY other person in my life. Ever. Well I felt like a kid going to Disneyland, I was SO EXCITED I could hardly contain myself, until a few days before I was leaving.. the dread and doubt set in, fast and heavy.

What if I was nothing like they expected? What if it was weird in person and I felt out of place and in the way? Their were 8 of them, they all knew each other a lifetime and here I come practically out of nowhere to say “ Hiii , I’m your Auntie A, and your moms are my sisters . Oh how you ask? Well our “ father” was a total P.O.S & we share DNA soooo here I AM! I hope y’all like me 😬 I literally felt physically ill the whole two days before I left .

The day arrived I had a 7 a.m. flight to LAX and a quick layover then puddle jumped to FRESNO airport. Meanwhile in a hazmat suit pretty much, pictured above, bc I have a pre existing condition and EVEN IF I DIDN’T I am terrified of getting COVID. So I was basically or literally rather risking my life to meet these people. I landed in Fresno and my oldest sister and her daughter , my YOUNGEST niece of the five , were standing there , at the end of the LONGGGGGG walk way through to the other side. I could see them, they could see me. My heart was beating SO LOUDLY I could hear it in my ears, palms sweating, dry mouth, almost in tears because I’m so overwhelmed by emotions.

I reached them, they embraced me. And it felt like HOME. Every worry , every doubt, all my fears and what if’s ... they were instantly washed away . It was the most intensely magical moment I’ve experienced to date. In THAT moment I knew my life was forever changed. In so many ways, and my ❤️, well that instantly was SO FULL .

The trip itself..... ups & downs with lots of lessons! Part 2 coming 🔜!