Feasting to Flourish

Three days without a regular menstrual cycle and I knew something unusual was happening within my body. The positive pregnancy test confirmed my hypothesis. After attending my first OBGYN appointment, I was beyond flustered. So much information, in such little time. One thing I managed to retain from the lengthy lecture appointment was: “Breast is best.” However, formula feeding is not “horrible.” I figured, as long as the baby is fed, right? Despite the similarities between formula feeding and breastfeeding, they are contrasting in quite a few ways.

Six months is what I pledged. Six months of inexpensive, nutrient abundant, body demanding bonding that sometimes resulted in excruciating breast engorgement and awkward outings. Six months filled with several nursing convenient additions to my wardrobe, special bottles designed for breastfed babies, and getting used to the discomfort of a human nursing, as well as a pump simulating the process, including the discomfort. Six months of building my psyche up for the days my supply wasn’t up to par and a freezer full of labeled bags containing my body gold. After six months of challenging my body to produce immense amounts of prolactin to feed my tiny human, I finally decided to ease myself of guilt and began shopping for the “best” formula. From the commonly used formulas covered by WIC, to the $32 “breast milk based” organic formula I eventually settled on. Comparing the ingredients, I realized the list of ingredients in breast milk outweighed the list for formula, almost astronomically. However, I was pleased to discover that one of the main ingredients important to the development of the brain, DHA, was included in both. Formula contains mostly synthetic proteins, vitamins, and minerals. Breast milk was packed with all of the natural forms of these ingredients, and even nutrients produced specifically for my boy. From his body temperature, to the consistency of the saliva he produced during feedings, my body was working diligently to accommodate my son in more ways than I ever knew were possible. Eventually, feeding times became shorter and pumping less productive. It was then that I knew it was time to wean my suckling cherub.

The process of switching was bittersweet. The time spent ensuring adequate milk production was successfully substituted with a convenient concoction of Plum's Organic and distilled water. Luckily, a depleting supply resulted in a fairly uncomplicated drought. I began to become overwhelmed with all of the things I could accomplish in the 15-20 minutes I was used to setting aside for pump sessions. With formula feeding there was more opportunity for feedings to be delegated between both parental parties, as opposed to myself being the sole provider for breastfeeding. There was a sense of comfort when seeing the ounces of formula being made into a bottle, as opposed to hoping what was produced in my breasts between feedings was enough. Formula fed burps were bigger, and spitting up was more frequent. His bowels changed in color, texture and smell. As a hyper-vigilant first time mother, I began to worry. However, a trip to his pediatrician assured me that my breastfed prince was tolerating the change to formula accordingly. His weight gain trended healthily, and he stayed in the averages of the growth chart for his age. The formula was doing exactly what it was intended to do, and was not far off from what breast milk had already accomplished.

Breast may be “best,” but a healthy baby is the sublime outcome. Whether that means sacrificing your body, or redeeming your free cans of formula from your state WIC program. As long as that baby is nourished and jubilant, the route of which the nutrients is received should be on the opposite end of the worry spectrum. Being able to provide essential nutrients as easily as lifting up my shirt was an experience all in its own. However, it was gratifying knowing that the nutrients provided in a single scoop of formula were ample at keeping my boy satiated and satisfied.