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Clouds over Paradise

Lakeisha

By Janie McDermottPublished 3 years ago 4 min read
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Chapter 2

Mama’s a CNA and she been doing overtime at the hospital, going in at seven at night instead of eleven like usual, so she sleeping now. I try to help where I can, cause I know how hard she work. I washed her scrubs and a few other things for her already, now I gotta see what I can do for dinner.

Let me see now. I opened the fridge and checked the crisper. Damn! We only got one potato. But that’s all right, we got some cabbage left, and I can use those carrots. I take out the carrots, potato, and cabbage and carry them over to the counter by the sink, then go back to the fridge and pull some ground beef out of the freezer. Mama gonna like this. She loves her some stew. Wonder do we have any of that cornbread mix left?

As I put the meat on the counter, I look out the window, just in time to see Christy Mama go jumping up the steps to number 48 and bang on the door, loud. Wonder what she want? I ain’t never seen her down here before. Hmmm. Ain’t none of my business.

The colander is still in the dish drainer from yesterday, so I put it in the sink to drain the vegetables after I scrub them. While I’m doing that, I hear Mr. Ron’s pickup – I can always tell it’s him, cause his truck is loud and has all kind of squeaks. The door slams and I guess he went in the house.

Then a minute later, here come Christy Mama tearing down the steps next door like something chasing her, leaving the door wide open. What the hell them white people up to? I just shake my head. Whatever. I finish washing the vegetables and go to put the meat in the microwave so it can defrost. They’re shouting over there now, so I give up and go look out the window. And here come Michael tearing down them same steps, and he takes off down the road toward the Meadows. And then I hear a thump and a scream and Michael’s Mama crying.

Oh my God! Mr. Ron beating her up!

I know that sound. I heard it enough when me and Mama still stayed with my Daddy. I forgot all about the stew and sat down at the kitchen table. I put my head on the table and covered it with my arms. But I could still hear her crying, then Mr. Ron fired up his truck and took off, fast, that old truck squealing tires. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God! I couldn’t stop shaking. I kept hearing my Mama crying instead of Michael’s Mama. I remembered hiding in my closet under the dirty clothes and hugging my little stuffed rabbit so scared so scared so scared don’t let Daddy find me let Mama be ok. My stomach was hurting so bad and I wanted to scream too cause it was all mixed up in my head my Mama Michael Mama my Daddy Mr. Ron people hitting on each other and hurting each other…I started pulling at my hair I can’t do this!

Then I remembered Miss Barris the counselor and I took a deep breath, like she told me to do when I get panicked. I let go of my hair, picked up my head off the table, and took another breath. I looked around, and saw myself sitting in the little kitchen in our little trailer house at 46 Paradise Court and I knew Daddy was gone and Mama was asleep in her bedroom and we were ok now but oh my God oh my God oh my God does it ever stop?

Finally, I felt like I could stand up. Like Mama always tells me, you got to keep going. If you ever fall and don’t get back up, keep going, you never gonna get back up. I thought about her, and I said out loud, “All right, all right. You got this. It ain’t nothing happened to you. It’s just like a bad dream. Now, come on, girl. We got to eat, and you got to cook.”

My legs shake a little when I stand up, and I have to hold onto the chair for a second. Come on, girl, you got this. I unwrap the meat and put it in a bowl and set it in the microwave on “defrost.” I pull Grandmama Bessie’s cutting board out of the cabinet, get out my favorite knife from her kitchen, and get to work on the carrots. Mama don’t like me to use her mother’s things much, but right now I need to feel close to Grandmama. I know she gone, but remembering her makes me feel safer. Nobody hurt nobody in her house.

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