Autistic Mom With Autistic Child

I was 20 when I had my first child. The next day was my birthday which would've made me 21. I know most young adults were finding themselves, going to college things like that. I was a fashion merchandiser student at the time, but I ended up dropping out because I wanted to be able to work and provide for my little one. When I saw my baby's face, it didn't matter about all the pain and weight gain I experienced for those 9 months. The only thought that I had was this little girl was going to change my life and I knew it, I knew it because she never stayed still while she was in my tummy.

As time went on, she grew and I got excited about her next growth spurt. She was taking her first steps. I knew that life couldn't be more beautiful than this. My baby was about to be on her way to independence. No more picking up, no more bottles, no more poopy pampers. Well let's not get too far ahead, she won't be potty trained yet until 1 or 2. I'm just thinking about all the things that are coming. I loved interacting with my little baby, she was chubby and had the brightest gums. She only had about two bottom teeth at the time. By the time between 12-15 months, she stopped making eye contact with me. By the following months after she wasn't speaking and she didn't really babble at all. I knew something was off. My baby wasn't speaking and she wasn't making any eye contact with me.

I took her to her pediatrician and they instantly bought a specialist in to do a quick evaluation and she was referred for special services. Between the ages of 1-3, she received three types of therapy. She couldn't be diagnosed with autism until she was 1. So before 1, she was still receiving it at home. She is currently speaking, knows how to speak Spanish, knows her planets, how to add, knows how to tell time on the big clock and so much more. This was only because of all the hard work and dedication that I was done home. If it wasn't for me seeing the signs between my beautiful child I would've never known and she possibly would be mute.

Fast forward to the present time, it has been a difficult journey. Some of my family's children have been diagnosed with autism and it leads me to believe that this is hereditary. Unfortunately, I also show signs that I could be autistic but never was diagnosed but I believe I am. What leads me to believe that is that I like to be alone, I don't run in big crowds. I also feel like being in a big crowd tends to be overwhelming because it's like I can feel everyone's emotions or I feel like I may be judged. But I find that there are things that I do love, I love music, art, writing, reading, I'm a Youtuber and I'm a medical college student currently.

Having an autistic child and being autistic can be very challenging. I don't like going out a lot however, I know that my child can learn if she's able to get in different environments. I also love my alone time, but I know that I have to still give a lot of time to my daughter she deserves it. I love to spend time with my child because she makes my world spin. She makes me know that when I'm gone she will leave my print here. With everything I wanted to do, I know she will leave her print.