The Most Embarrassing Roommate Moment In College

I'm from Ghana, West Africa. I played tennis there and was a national champion before getting a scholarship to attend college in the USA. So before I arrived at the New Mexico Military Institute (NMMI) in the Fall of 1993, I was in the best shape of my life. At the least, that’s what I thought.

Then I found out that Roswell, New Mexico was 5,000 feet above sea-level. Ghana is at sea-level, so for those of you who don’t understand the color I’m trying to paint is that, at sea-level, the air is thicker than at 5,000 feet above sea-level. Athletes get tired very easily at a higher altitude, an athlete must train for the higher altitude. I had to be extra fit at NMMI and I was working on it.

I got to a point, my abs were ribbed. 8 packs with all the definitions. Two extra than normal for good measure. It was rock solid, I could take any punch in my guts and never miss a beat if I’m talking. One girl told me she wanted to wash her panties on my abs, I booked an appointment with her, every Saturday at noon.

Then we couldn’t meet because we were both living on campus with Troop Leadership Advisors (TLA’s) all over the place, ready to stick anyone that cuts out of line.

I mean if really strong wanted to punch me, the punch could take me to the ground but I will not be hurt at my stomach. I was built like an MMA athlete. I was 5 feet 8 inches, and weighed about 125 pounds at that time. I knew the wait because we had to do physicals every year to be on scholarship.

My roommate was a footballer on scholarship too, weighing well over 200 pounds, a lineman, came in one day. I was shirtless and I believe I was wearing black shorts, school issued one. It was a military school so everything was uniformed. I stood in front of him and I asked him to “blow me.” He was like, what do you mean? I repeated “blow me” to my stomach. Just give me any blow, do you understand me? He looked confused like he didn't understand what I was saying.

He went out and called some cadets he could find to come to our room and asked me to tell those cadets what I just told him. I told them to “blow me”, everyone started laughing. I didn’t know why. I was clueless. He took me to our troop leader in Foxtrot to tell him what I just told him and everybody else in our room. I repeated it in front of the troop leader, whom I forgot his name to “blow me”. He laughed too.

We came back to our room, still, my roommate hasn’t “blow me” yet. I figured maybe “blow me” means something different in America than it does in Ghana. I tried to explain what I meant for my roommate to do by breaking it down. I said, do you know what I am trying to ask you to do? I want you to throw a blow to my stomach like they do in boxing. He was like yeah, I think I get it but don’t use the word “blow” use “punch” instead. I asked him why he didn’t tell me why. He just said, if you weren’t my roommate, I could have hurt you or kill you, I don’t remember the exact words.

That was my most embarrassing roommate story at NMMI.