New Beginning

In 2016 I decided to go to college. It was something I hadn't accomplished yet and I wanted to do it but life kind of got in the way. So I moved to Florida with my kids and saw a commercial for Full Sail University. Yeah, there were other colleges I could have attended but Full Sail University offered online classes and that's what appealed to me. I'm Bipolar and have ADD, and claustrophobia and agoraphobia so a classroom setting was not ideal to my learning style.

My journey started in August of 2016 and I was terrified. I had a one-month grace period to sink or swim. Well I ended up doing the doggy paddle through the first class which turned out the assignment we did a video assignment didn't even count for a grade. What absolute nonsense is that. I went all out for this video and I hate being in front of a camera in the first place. I dressed up as a character from one of my books. I wore black make-up and a cloak which sort of covered my face and gave this cute little speech about what I'd be working on. Honestly, the professor enjoyed the video and the fact the in spite of me hating to be in front of the camera I went out of my comfort zone and did the assignment.

During this journey I realized much of what I was going to be doing was getting out of my comfort zone and passing the line I drew in the sand for myself a long time ago. Oh, I'm not going to do this or that. Yeah, well, Full Sail University has a way of getting you out of your comfort zone whether you like it or not. So, suck it buttercup. It's going to happen. To this day I will absolutely abhor flash fiction. I won't write it or read it. You want me to read it you better pay me to do it. Or still toothpicks up in my eyelids, it's not going to be something I do willingly.

During the Bachelor's Program for Creative Writing in Entertainment I learned something about myself. Fear is a wonderful inspiration. Especially my own personal fears. I have a top five and no I won't list them. However, I can tell you that because of that list I have come to appreciate writing horror scripts. My true love is fantasy and coming in third is science fiction stories. I'm terrified of horror movies. I know what scares me and I've learned what scares the hell out of people to the point that I'll write a horror script and leave myself with PTSD afterward. Actually, there have been a few things in my own writings that have giving me PTSD. One of them was writing the death of one of my new favorite characters. In writing we are taught, "Learn to kill your darlings." Oh, indeed I did. It was brutal and graphic. Something that would make you hide in the closest and pray the murderer didn't find you.

I was proud of myself when I graduated Bachelor's Creative Writing Program. I sat home and watched my name play across the screen. No, I didn't walk down the aisle or go up on stage. My phobias; claustrophobia and agoraphobia kind of keep me homeward bound. It's alright though I celebrated with my family at home. Nice and quiet. Afterward I crocheted some pouches for my Etsy store.

Once I graduated I needed more. Sooo, I went back for my Master's in Creative Writing. At the time I am writing this I will have one week left officially as of Sunday the 24th of May. I graduate June 5th. Now thanks to this Covid-19 virus no one gets to graduate on stage and everyone gets to be home and watch their names light up the screen. I will once again be happy to do this and share with my family. It's not every day a forty-eight year old mother of four graduates from college. It's a milestone in my lifetime. When I'm fifty I'm hoping to see my name on the big screen. I have books out as well published on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. My graduation will be a momentus moment in time for me. It doesn't happen every day and I'm doing it for my family. I'm willing to make a total sacrifice for my family if I have to and whether or not they want to come with me in the long run remains to be seen.

To all the writer's out there. Keep writing. Stay safe and stay healthy. Godbless.