You know, I’m not ready to be an adult. I wish there was a way to time travel back to when I was a kid. By junior and senior year everyone always told me that I should get prepared for college and to be ready for adulthood, but I put it off because I thought I had time. Now it’s here and I’m just making it. Adjusting to life after high school is definitely different for everyone, but I’m going to tell you about mine. Right now I’m in college about 170 miles away from my house and I’m struggling between missing my family, friends and dog and trying to keep up with my college classes, homework and having some relaxation time.
A couple weeks before move in day I started packing and I was getting excited to move into a dorm room. I was going to meet new people and be on my own for the first time. The trip up to college was a blast too because my family and I were jamming out to the radio and telling stories all while the car was at its capacity with everything I was bringing. We arrived around 1 o'clock and started bringing all of my belongings up to the room. From the time we got to the college until we finished unpacking the car and they left was just crazy and chaotic everywhere.
Now. Here’s where it finally hit me. I said goodbye to my mom, dad and sister and went back up to the room, now full of packages and just sat on my bed. My head was just filled with emotions and running with thoughts, asking myself what am I even doing here? I’m alone and don’t have one clue what to do. What should I be doing and how will I live? Under all that pressure I put on myself, I just started crying and was afraid that I was going to fail. After about 15 minutes, I pulled myself together and hung out with my roommates. They came into my room, we talked and got to know each other. Throughout the rest of the day, I started feeling more comfortable and with all the meetings I had to go to I didn’t worry about how much I missed home.
That Monday when classes started I wasn’t really sure what to expect and I was just super nervous altogether. I really don’t remember much but I do remember walking in and thinking, “This is college and everyone is now an adult trying to get through school. But I don’t feel like an adult and am probably not ready for these classes uhhh?!?” Now that I’m about two months into these classes, I’ve realized that I can do this and it isn’t too hard if I really put my mind to it. The one thing that really gets me is all the homework because I get so much of it and I procrastinate really bad.
Motivation. I try to give myself motivation and tell myself that if I do it now, I’ll have more free time later, but usually it doesn’t work. There are so many other things I want to do which makes me forget that I even have homework. I always get it done eventually and I’m definitely doing better with getting it done earlier now then when I first started classes. One thing that I love is band class every Wednesday because after 4 years of it in high school it’s nice to continue that and be in a comfortable environment where I belong. I love the people I met and being able to play my clarinet!
I don’t go out much. Well I don’t go out at all unless it’s to get food, go shopping with my roommates, or eat lunch with a friend from one of my classes, but I really don’t mind because I enjoy doing just that and I have a lot of time for myself. I get to stay in my room and watch tv and take naps. If I’m not doing homework then that is exactly what you’d find me doing. I love watching Riverdale with my roommate every week and since it’s October, the Halloween movies on Freeform. It’d be nice to do something other than homework and sleeping, but for now I guess I’m doing just fine.
College life is both rough and exciting, but I think I’m balancing everything that’s happening just fine. I still miss my family and friends so much and can’t wait for a weekend I can go home and visit them, but I enjoy being here too and seeing what I can accomplish on my own. I never thought it’d be my turn to go off and be an adult but here I am and it just happened so fast. Sometimes it would be nice to be a kid again. I mean, everyone always told me to just enjoy being a kid while you can and I should’ve listened to them.