How to Make Real Friends in College

It took me a couple of months in to college to figure out what kind of friends I wanted.

A lot of girls here make friends through bonding over drinking. And maybe it's my liver or mother talking, but it doesn't seem so reliable.

But, if I do know one thing, you meet the best people by accident.

Meeting My Best Friend

Our class had been moved to another building. As a freshman, that kinda made me panic. I barely knew where my classes were still.

I stood outside the new building, not far off from the original we were at. The anxiety of walking into the wrong class was killing me, but the couple of people waiting with me seemed confident.

I turned to the girl next to me and asked if we were both waiting for Media Arts to start (highkey bane of my existence).

I sat with her every day after that, and slowly she became my best friend. From eating food to crying over dumb stuff, we've been through it all now.

We both felt like finding friends on campus who wanted to do more than go downtown were near impossible to find.

We're not opposed to having fun drinking, but neither of us wanted it to consume our lives.

Now, as a sophomore, I'm so lucky to have had such a great friend for a year now.

I can definitely say it was rough prior to finding her. Finding people who want real conversations was a problem, too.

A lot of girls just wanted to talk about boys, which is fine, but not all the time! I was "finding myself" then so I wasn't super into talking about guys all day long.

But like, there is so much to talk about!! And when I wanted to talk about climate change or what the next pop star was doing, they faked interest long enough to go back to their original topic.

My best friend and I on the other hand, talk about EVERYTHING. Lately it's been politics, the environment, and how excited we are to live together next year!

How to Find Friends

I know there is nothing wrong with drinking—live ya life, girl. I just wanted to make memories I remember and to talk about more than just surface issues.

I would advise you to look in classes, around campus, someone sitting alone, just about anywhere to meet new people.

But make sure to find out if there are things in common. In my opinion, find people who want to do things that require no money and no alcohol. At least until you get to know them.

The most fun is not spending money but having the best time regardless.

Once you find those good people, hang onto them. Everybody is ready to make new friends in college, but it's a learning experience.

What to Do If I Have Bad Friends

Boy, have I been there.

A lot of times you just jump for the first nice person on your hall or class. Just be careful.

If you find yourself with bad friends, don't worry. People grow apart and together in college. Your schedules will change, and depending on the college size, may not even see each other that much.

It's easier to pull away gently in college than in high school. You're not forced to see people every day.

If they're in your dorm building, just stay busy and avoid them. Sometimes this is hard, but honestly you might need someone to tell you to finish that paper. So let me be that.

So Basically...

Just take your time. Good things and good people take patience. You'll find your niche and figure things out.

Just remember change is good and you got this.