Going back to College as a 31 year old Undergrad

I will be transferring to a Bachelor’s Degree program before this year is over. I am 31 years old. I’m here to tell you that this process is not meant for the faint-hearted.

I have traversed a rocky road to get here and it wasn’t filled with marshmallows and chocolate.

The idea of a mountain of debt waiting for me on the other side of college didn’t appeal to me at 18. I didn’t know a lot, but I knew that. Unfortunately, my parents weren’t in the position to help me pay for it so I was on my own. I was indecisive, and to some degree, I still am. I settled on my local community college. My social life peaked during this time so school took a back seat, naturally. I was working while going to school. Somehow, college got lost in translation, and so did I. I was the personification of a thoughtless butterfly floating around without a care in the word. I was numb and I didn’t care how my immediate actions affected my future. I had to take a semester off because my grades began to implode. I went back and received my Associate’s Degree. I found a decent paying job and I bought myself a car. My brain began to rot and I could see myself slip into this mediocrity that everyone around me so easily accepted. I wanted more. I completed a professional certificate program and I got a job pretty quickly. My brain was refurbished. I have held a few different positions in this new field and all have left something to be desired. Instead of continuing to chase my tail, I decided it was time for a major change.

I am returning to higher education after an 11 year break. The process of enrolling in college at 31 is daunting. It is difficult to be evaluated by the academic prowess you displayed when you were a child. I am having to jump through hoops to fill out financial aid forms and transcript request forms. Not to mention, the unearthing of memories and choices I would rather forget. The amount of college employees you have to interact with to get something done is ungodly. It’s very cyclic. One action triggers another and you can’t jump ahead. You are at the mercy of the people determining your future. It really is a part-time job (I will continue to work full-time). Nevermind, I am trying to accomplish this feat during a pandemic. I am paying for all of this myself and let’s just say, part of the decision to go back to school is because I am getting paid pennies on the dollar in my current role and I live on my own in an expensive city.

I submitted all application materials, including my college transcript, and was under the impression that my job was done. Now, I have to submit my HIGH SCHOOL transcripts from 13 years ago. I will let you picture the antiquated system I am having to interface with for that request. I am still waiting on my financial aid package information and I submitted a FAFSA three weeks ago. The classes I need to take are filling up. I have to believe that my resilience is being tested.

Nobody told that thoughtless butterfly what it would be like to go through this with frayed, battered wings in the future, instead of applying her youthful self when she had the chance.