Deception and Delusion...

This Trend Is Disturbing

There is a disturbing trend that is taking place amongst many men and women. As a Relationship Coach, I must discuss this issue because I always encourage clients and people, in general, to lead with their hearts and not with their heads in intimate matters. Let me be clear! It’s intimate for the women, but not for the men.

What Is The Trend?

Men and women met on dating apps and social media sites. They exchange phone numbers and start calling each other. Mind you, there’s always a distance between the man and woman. The distance varies. It could be a couple of hours apart or in another part of the country. In any case, they decide they want to see each other (Not in the flesh though).

They accomplish this with sites like Zoom, Skype, or Instagram facetime. Their connection is calls, texts, and facetime. The man never asks to come to see her. Men propose. Women accept or reject. He never proposes that they get together, and when she brings it up he comes up with an excuse as to why he can’t do it.

This behavior continues for months, and in some cases years. At the same time, the woman makes herself believe she is in a relationship with this man. This is the delusion. Here’s some tough love for the women. “There’s no intimate relationship without physical contact.” In short, the men are intentionally deceiving women and the women are responding to the deception with delusion.

The Essence Of This Trend

There’s a tradition that states, “One of the signs of the end of time are, that women will outnumber men. So much so that one man will be taking care of fifty women.” The tradition does not mean he will be in a relationship with fifty women. It means, he will be a comforter, advisor, and confidant for multiple women. Why is this relevant to the deception and delusion? Part of our natural inclination as men and women is to have an intimate connection with another human being.

It doesn’t matter if our lives are filled with family members, friends, and good co-workers. Every now and then we will still get lonely without an intimate companion in our lives. These deceiving men have no intimate interest in these women because if they did, they would have to see the women in person. Men’s brains and hearts can’t establish an intimate connection without physical contact. If we are attracted to a woman, we will find a way to see her. Clearly, these men have another agenda. However, because women like attention from men, they deceive themselves into believing they’ve formed a relationship with these deceivers.

Who’s To Blame?

There’s blame to go around. But, the lion’s share of it in this situation has to go to the women. Why? Because once she sees that he’s not interested in having an intimate relationship with her, she must cut it off. It doesn’t mean that she can’t be friends with him. What it means is, that she must stop sharing intimate parts of herself with this man who has no interest in intimacy with her. How does she see that he’s not interested in her in that way? It’s stated above. He never wants to be in her presence physically. A man who is interested in an intimate relationship with a woman has to see her in person.

What’s The Cure?

Men need to stop lying. Women need to stop accepting the lies. Therefore, if the men need assistance healing this part of themselves, get in touch with the “Les Brown of Relationships,” me. And, if the women need to heal from accepting the lies, I’m here for you as well.

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